Cracked Visage
by Crystilia Aerosine
Summary: Gaia has a serene visage... But the cracks are beginning to show... Gaia needs a savior. But is anyone strong enough in this world of underlying pain? Or is he already lost? ZxC. ALL CHAPTERS BEING SHORTENED TO 2,000 WORDS, NOT NEW UPDATES!
1. Overview

**Cracked Visage Overview**

**READ THIS ENTIRE PAGE! IMPORTANT FOR UNDERSTANDING THE FIC! PLEASE READ!**

**A/N:**** This story has a lot of pairings, almost all the characters in the game have a relationship of some sort, though most don't get much mention. The story won't be all romance and sex and it won't be all drama either. This story has humor, drama, romance, tragedy, action, and a lot of other genres. This is because real life has all of these things and so the story needs them to be truly amazing. This is my first Final Fantasy VII fic and my second fic of all time, so I'm still fairly new. I have not played through the entire original game, or Crisis Core, or Before Crisis… I have seen the movie and watched Last Order. I have also seen all the Crisis Core cut scenes and played pretty far into the original game. So though I am not the most versed Final Fantasy VII writer, I do know the basic story and I have researched for my fic. The POV of this story skips around a lot, so you kind of have to pay attention to the speech characteristics of the characters. I.e. Reno's yo or Rufus' sophisticated speech. Well that's it, so please enjoy!**

**Summary:**

**The world has a serene visage… But the cracks are beginning to show. Gaia needs a savior. But is anyone strong enough in this world of underlying pain? Or is he already lost? Can Cloud save himself in time to save Gaia? Or will it be up to Zack? AVALANCHE is trying, but reformed with only one original member and no Elfé, they have little hope. With Rufus taking over ShinRa after his father's death, the situation looks pretty grim. But what must be done will be done, whether Cloud wants to be the hero or not.**

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**POV:**

**Mainly 1****st**** person from several different people's view. 3****rd**** person at times.****

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Warnings:

**Yaoi, semi-AU, (some) spoilers, OCs and semi-OCs, torture, murder, (severe) language, homo and het couples, (hints) incest, very mild Tifa bashing, blood eroticism, S/M, major fluff (at times), angst, hate, OOC (at times), graphic sex (lemons, limes, etc..), dark, child abuse (Rufus), and (minor and literal) insanity. ******

Note:

**Semi-OCs. Canon Turks given names and personalities. All semi-OCs are Turks from Before Crisis, the mobile phone game in Japan.**

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DISCLAIMER:

I do not and never will own Final Fantasy 7, Crisis Core, Before Crisis, or any of the characters mentioned in this story (outside of my own OCs). I received no profit for this story, aside from the warm fuzzy feelings provided by my readers.

Pairings (past, present, and future):

Note:

** In homosexual relationships the seme name comes first, then uke, unless the pair doesn't have fixed positions. Threesomes have semes listed first, then next line for dominance, then the real uke. **

**Note: FTB - Friends with Benefits**

**1. Zack x Cloud (present)**

**2. Zack x Aeris (past and semi-present)**

**3. Zack x Cissnei (Cissnei crush)(past and semi-present)**

**4. Reno x Zack (past)**

**5. Reno x Rufus (Not fixed)(future)**

**6. Reno x Ryuu (FTB)(Semi-OC)(present)**

**7. Reno x Elena (present)**

**8. Reno x Various women (mentioned/hinted)(mostly prostitutes)(past and present)**

**9. Reno x Rufus x Cloud (future)**

**10. Tseng x Emina (Hinted)(Semi-OC, Elena's sister)(past)**

**11. Tseng x Elena (future)**

**12. Tseng x Aeris (one-sided)(present)**

**13. Tseng x Rufus (Rufus crush)(one-sided)(past)**

**14. Rufus x Cloud (mutual sexual tension)(future)**

**15. Sephiroth x Zack (FTB)(past)**

**16. Sephiroth x Cloud (Cloud crush)(one-sided)(past)**

**17. Sephiroth x Aeris (In death)(far future)**

**18. Sephiroth x Genesis (past)**

**19. Hojo x Ifalna (rape)(past)(child)**

**20. Hojo x Lucrecia (rape)(past)(child ??)**

**21. Vincent x Lucrecia (affair)(past)(child ??)**

**22. Vincent x Yuffie (Yuffie crush)(one-sided)(future)**

**23. Tifa x Cloud (onesided)(past and present)**

**24. Sears/Biggs x Jessie (mentioned)(mentioned in the future, happened in the present)**

**25. Sears/Biggs x Elfé (past)**

**26. Verdot x Tseng (mentioned/hinted)(past)**

**27. Lazard x Rufus (incest)(mentioned)(past)**

**28. Angeal x Sephiroth x Genesis (mentioned)(past)**

**29. Cid x Shera (past and future)**

**30. Dyne x Barret (hinted)(past)**

**31. Heidegger x Rufus (rape)(past)**

**Note: "Child ??" means that the child's biological real father is unknown or will be revealed later in the fic.**


	2. Prologue

**Prologue**

x-x-x

"I can't do this... Not now.. Not ever!"

"Don't leave me... please God don't go."

"You said you would always be there...You're a liar Zack."

"Why doesn't my voice work? Why can't you hear me?"

"..."

"Please Zack... I love you..."

x-x-x

"Gaia Cloudy, I don't wanna die."

"I know you can't save me, but that doesn't mean I can't wish for it."

"This hurts, this good bye. I don't think I can even say it anymore."

"I'm so cold now."

"I never got to tell you. I never said it back. I regret it now."

"God Cloud, I'm gonna miss you, love."

x-x-x

"L-life2!"

x-x-x

"Sorry Angeal, I need a little more time here, I think I might be in..."

x-x-x

"AHHHHHHHH..."

x-x-x

"Forgive me Zack, I'm not ready to be alone."


	3. Initial Freedom

**Note: The "x-x-x" signal scene changes and, most of the time, POV changes. All POV changes happen in scene changes.**

**Rekka - Cissnei and Charger - Shou.**

**For the disclaimer refer to the Overview. Please and thank you. **

**ENJOY!**

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Cracked Visage

**Initial Freedom**

"Ugh..."

Zack's moans of pain gurgled out of his throat as he strained to opens his eyes. Cloud looked down at his best friend, his lover, his mentor, his everything, and just before he passed out on top of him, he whispered five simple words.

"Thank you, Zack. Good night."

x-x-x

Blue eyes flickered open to meet blue skies. Groans spilled forth from his mouth. Everything hurt, and there was a massive pressure on his chest. With great difficulty, he slowly sat up, forcing the weight off his chest. Zack's barely focused eyes fell upon the body formerly strewn across his chest. A bright crop of chocobo reminiscent hair stuck together in tufts, held together by dried blood. "Cl-Cloud?" His hoarse voice croaked, strained from abuse caused by the screams his throat had previously been pushing forth. Panic set in as his young friend didn't respond. Zack sat up straight and latched on to Cloud and softly shook him. "Cloud! Cl-Cloud!" His voice broke with sheer panic rather than strain. Seconds ticked by as Zack searched his companion's face for any sign of coherence. Then to his infinite relief, Cloud's face scrunched up slightly, signaling he was still amongst the living. It was beautiful. Zack felt warm beads of water roll down his cheeks as sobs racked his body. He thanked the Lifestream that they hadn't taken his Cloud away. He hunched over his small love and cried his relief dry. Never in his life was he more happy to be alive with Cloud than this moment. They were together and that's all that mattered. It didn't matter if he was in so much pain he could barely move. It didn't matter he was covered in blood, rain and mud. And it didn't matter that Turk helicopters were closing in on their location. All that mattered was Cloud. As long as Cloud was with him he was free and all was good.

x-x-x

This was bullshit. This mission was pointless and complete waste of time. The Turks should be out looking the new AVALANCHE, not scouring the wasteland outside of Midgar in search of escaped fugitives. TO DELIVER A PACKAGE!! This was the most insane thing that had ever left the superior's mouth. Don't get me wrong, I respect Tseng like a father-figure, but this was crazy. Zack Fair and Cloud Strife. Peachy. Psycho A and Psycho B. Two timebombs of different categories, but timebombs none the less. On one hand you have a hyper, loud-mouthed, violent, First Class SOLDIER, country-boy. And on the other, a quiet, mysterious, mako sensitive, Sephiroth killin', country-boy. Oh and to add to that lovely picture, both have been under experimentation by Hojo for five years in MAKO TANKS! A mako sensitive is bad enough with normal dose, put'em in a TANK and you have a monster. That's why most are weeded out of the SOLDIER program early. Fuckin' lunatics.

All this stress is drivin' me to drink and smoke. Ah the two best vices below sex. Nothin' like a good scotch and smoke to take the edge off. Damn Rude, Mr. Stoic himself, will never loosen up and drink with me. All his "You can't fly a helicopter while drunk." shit gets annoying. He should know I'm a damn good pilot. I have never been drunk enough to be a danger in the cockpit. 'Sides, it takes a lot to get me smashed. I've built up a tolerance over my whole life. After all, the slums teach ya some crazy shit. The slums. Heh, that hell-hole built me up as much as it tore me down. As fightin' skills went up, emotional skills went down. Sector 7, home sweet home, right? Nah, that place has got nothin' left for me there 'cept broken dreams and hollow memories. Hell, I got the Turks now. No need to remember my severely lacking family back home.

I'm goin' nuts. This is a wild goos... Oh shit.

- Static -

"Rekka to Red, Rekka to Red. Over."

"Red to Rekka, what's up, yo? Over."

"Professionalism Red, professionalism. But what's your situation? Over."

"I think we found'em, yo. Over."

"Good. I'll inform Superior. What's your coordinates? Over."

"Point 136. Over."

"On my way. Landmark? Over."

"Blood an' carnage, yo. Over."

- whispered - "Oh Gaia..."

- static -

"Charger to Red, Rekka is having a nervous break down... What do I do?"

"Red to Charger. First of all, dumbass, you end in 'over'. Second, take the damn reins, yo! Damn rookie, you gotta be prepared for everything, including PMSing Turk women. Over."

"Y-yes, sir."

"OVER! Over."

"Sorry, sir. Over."

"Head to point 136, quickly. Over."

"Yes, sir. Over."

"Oh and by the way..."

"Yes, sir? Over."

"DON'T CRASH MY BIRD, ROOKIE! Over."

"Yes, sir!"

"OVER!"

"Sorry, sir!! Over."

"Whatever, yo. Over and out."

"Over and out."

- static -

"Must you be so harsh with him, Reno? He is new after all." I roll my eyes at Rude's comment. Charger is the radio codename for our new Turk, Shou. He is coming in to replace Mizuki, our knives girl. But the guy is dull, really dull. He should know if Cissnei drops, he should pick up where she left off. "If I don't do it, yo, he'll never learn." Rude shakes his head and shuts up just like I knew he would. We have a good understanding of each other. He knows I take my job seriously, despite my obvious lack of motivation to dress correctly, and I know he has a heart under his cold outward appearance. He also is one of the only ones in my life who know that there's more to me than the drunken slum rat persona. He just might be the only one who knows I actually have an education and that I can, on occasion, use it. He also is one of the only ones who know I am also certifiably crazy. Literally. Whack me upside the head a few times and I crack. Mako starts pumpin', eyes turn SOLDIER blue, get faster, smarter (ironically), and a whole lot more sadistic and cruel. Only Rude, Tseng, and.. well.. Zack, have seen that me. Whatever.

Aw shit. This looks bad. Lots'a blood.

Fuck you, Zack. Fuckin' asshole. Sonovabitch. Why did you have to go and leave SOLDIER? Why, yo? Man, you were my best fuckin' friend. But, damn man, my ShinRa family is more important. What's the saying? Blood is thicker than water? Well it's true. All the blood shed by ShinRa ties us together, I thought you understood that. You and the Gen. Well, the General turned out to be fuckin' crazy, but hell I am too aren't I? What about you? You fit the description of crazy too, ya know. A dumbfuck who threw his rank, friends, family, girlfriend, and life away for that cute blond of yours. Is he that good in bed? Well, whatever, that sounds crazy to me. You're lucky Tseng likes you, or you would be so screwed. Gaia, you better not be dead, you asshole. I do NOT need to be the one to find your body...

Oh wait... Is that.. you? CRYING?

HOLY SHIT! You are! WHERE'S THE FUCKIN' CAMERA!?

x-x-x

"AHAHAHAHAHA..."

"Reno you are going to die of asphyxiation if you don't breathe."

"AHAHAHAHAHA... - choke -"

"Told you."

x-x-x

"Oh Shit."

Turks.

More importantly...

Reno...

Cloud, we are so screwed.

x-x-x

"Hey Partner? Do we have a high-focused camera?" Rude smirks. "We're Turks. We have everything."

"Oh good."

x-x-x

"Let's get the hell out of here Cloudy." Cloud doesn't respond, but I know he hears me. I told him about Reno, the lunatic. The man is a timebomb. Seriously. I pull myself to my feet, dragging Cloud with me. We need to get out of here. Midgar is so close. Midgar is safety. I have to protect Cloud. I still have to tell Aeris... She may never forgive me, but I can't help that I lost feelings for her and gained them for Cloud. She deserves to know. She was amazing. I thought I loved her... Till Cloud saved my life. He did that the day he entered it. He is what I live for, he will always be my everything. I can still feel the tears slipping down my face. I don't care anymore. With a hand on my sword and one around Cloud, I begin to limp away. I know I can't outrun the helicopters now that they are here, but I'll sure as hell try. If we get caught by Turks, we are doomed. Doomed to be killed or to be returned to Hojo. I will die before I let either happen to Cloud. In fact, from the pain in my body, I have a feeling I may have done just that a couple hours ago. But that doesn't explain why I am alive now. How could I be alive? I could have sworn that I was shot fatally several times. Well, screw it, I'm not gonna argue with fate. Not to mention, I left Cloud a ways away, and I woke up with him on me, so he must have woken up! He just might be the thing that saved me. I knew he was my little moody angel!

x-x-x

"Hold still, dammit, yo!" While I'm fumbling around, Rude is trying to maneuver the bird into position. I NEED this. It just might turn this day around. "Here we go Reno." Sometimes I just loved Rude. He was so awesome when it came to these things.

"Ok, yo! Let's do this."

"On my signal Reno."

"Ready..."

"Aim..."

"FIRE!"

x-x-x

Strobe lights?! Since when did Turks use strobe lights to incapacitate targets?! I was ready for tear gas, bullets, projectiles, tranq. darts, anything but strobe lights! Damn SOLDIER eyes!

I'M FUCKING BLIND!

x-x-x

"HOLY SHIT! I GOT IT, YO!"

Rude burst into laughter looking at the photo. In any other situation, I would be expecting the apocalypse if Rude laughed like that, but hell it was really funny. Zack's face was hilarious. He looked like Sephiroth descended from the Lifestream wearing a frilly pink dress and declared he was becoming a poledancer. Not to mention, the tears were a nice touch.

x-x-x

What...

The...

Fuck...

Laughter? Where the hell did that come from.

Oh look they crashed.

Serves the bastards right.

"Come on Cloud, let's make a run for it while they are caught up with their insanity."

x-x-x

- static -

"Rekka to Red, Rekka to Red. What's wrong? Your signal just went out, are you injured? Over."

- static -

"Red? Red? Over."

- static -

whispered "Oh my Gaia... Are they?" distant sobbing

"Charger to Stone, Charger to Stone. Rekka is down again! Is anyone out there?! Over."

"AHAHAHAHA..."

"Stone??"

"Stone to Charger. We're down... AHAHAHA... but we're fine. Tell Rekka... AHAHA.. Tell Rekka... AHAHAHA... Oh Shiva just hurry. Over. AHAHA..."

- static -

Stumbling out of the wreckage, Rude takes note of the damage. The bird is most likely totaled. But it was worth it. The laughter was a delightful reprieve for this boring mission. Reno has passed out due to lack of air. The picture is worth the bird, Reno's loss of consciousness, and the reprimand for the mission and totaled helicopter.

x-x-x

Midgar. Safety. Freedom.

Finally, we can set foot here as people instead of SOLDIERs. Gaia it feels good. Even with Cloud's limp body in my arms, I can't help but be happy. "We're finally free. We can do this together, Cloud. From here on we are mercenaries!" The blond in his arms wrinkled his nose slightly subconsciously. Zack laughed, a musical sound. "No worries, Cloudy! I'll protect you!"

x-x-x

Well this is gonna suck. Turk meeting. Fuck. I'm tryin' to make this cigarette last, so I can stall my eventual need to enter the soon-to-be torture chamber. Tseng was not happy to hear I totaled a heli. In fact, he's pretty much pissed. Most can't tell, since he has no emotions on the outside and all, but I can. He starts emanating a cold aura. It's quite frightening. Dammit. But at least that picture came out great.

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**Semi-OC Turk names:**

**Rod - Ryuu - Dragon.**

**Gun - Emina - Beloved.**

**2 Guns - Hiro - Great.**

**Shotgun - Kotone - Harp sound.**

**Martial Arts (m) - Yuuta - Well built hero.**

**Martial Arts (f) - Saika - Colorful flower.**

**Katana - Kazuhiro - Great harmony.**

**Shuriken - Cissnei - Aiko - Love child.**

**Nunchaku - Daiki - Very valuable.**

**Knives (f) - Mizuki - Beautiful moon.**

**x-x-x**

**My OC - Knives (m) - Shou - Soar.**


	4. Dishonorable Dismissal

**Cracked Visage**

**Dishonorable Dismissal**

"Cissnei. Shuriken."

"Sir."

"Daiki. Nunchaku."

"Sir."

"Emina. Gun."

"Sir."

"Hiro. Two Guns."

"Sir."

"Kazuhiro. Katana."

"Sir."

"Kotone. Shotgun."

"Sir."

"Ryuu. Rod."

"Sir."

"Saika. Martial arts."

"Sir."

"Shou. Knives."

"Sir."

"Yuuta. Martial arts."

"Sir."

"Rude. Hand-to-hand."

"Sir."

"Reno. E.M.R."

"..."

"Reno?"

"..."

"For Shiva's sake."

x-x-x

The door flew open next to me, and out came a very pissed Tseng. I tensed and scratched the back of my head. "Uhh... Yo, sir." I said with a two finger salute. Tseng narrowed his eyes. "Inside. Now." I stomped my cigarette out and rushed inside, taking a seat next to Rude. Rude leaned over slightly and whispered, "You are screwed now, Reno." I groaned silently. Tseng entered the room again. "Mind explaining why you are late, Reno?" With a sigh, I stand. "Uhh, sir, I was finishin' my cigarette 'cause I know you hate the smell of them and it was no where close to being done. And I hate to waste cigarettes, so for the comfort of everyone in the room, I decided it would be best to finish my cigarette outside where all you guys couldn't smell it. Sir." Tseng nodded and relaxed a bit. I mentally sighed. "Now explain why you failed your mission and how you crashed your helicopter." I groaned out loud. "Come now Reno, explain." Fidgeting, I started the long and drawn-out lie I wove together while outside. I knew Rude would agree with whatever I threw out. I also knew Tseng wouldn' buy it either. But I could give him the real explanation in private where I won't look like such an idiot.

"So you see sir, a fallen grunt's gun was set off by the target and set on auto. Pointed directly at our chopper, we could not really avoid the shots. A bullet pierced the cockpit causing electrical damage. The worst of the damage was located in the piloting system, resulting in a technical malfunction. Which, in the end, resulted in our unconventional landing, sir." I finished with a small sigh. Tseng raised an eyebrow, not a good sign. "So you're saying you were brought down by a standard issue machine gun for grunts? Not even a SOLDIER gun? A grunt gun? In a ShinRa Turk issued helicopter? Sounds outlandish, really." I stuttered. "The gun was wielded by a First Class SOLDIER! He has been trained in firearms!" I cursed in my head. "A wounded First Class SOLDIER." Tseng corrected. I opened my mouth to defend my story some more, but Tseng held up a hand. "Quiet Reno. Sit down." I hung my head. "Yes sir." Just as I was sitting down, the door opened. Everyone stood and saluted. "Sir!" A chorus of voices said in unison.

Rufus ShinRa was a scary man in many ways. Physically he wasn't impressive. Not very tall, blond hair, blue eyes, pale, skinny, white suit. Oh and not to mention he was a kid! Head of Turks from sixteen to eighteen, from there he took over Vice Presidency. I joined Turks at fifteen, he was twelve. So that makes him about twenty-two now. Considering that I was raised in the Sector 7 slums, I grew up fast, and he was the only son of the most powerful man on earth, so he was pampered most likely. That probably puts him at a seventeen year old's maturity, if even that. But Ifrit is he scary. I've heard about some of his secretaries being shot just for calling him on the intercom while he had a headache. I usually thank Shiva he runs the Junon H.Q. But for right now the terrorist attacks have made it important for the entire Turk force to be here in Midgar. And Odin forbid Rufus be alone for a week. I mean the kid's got a sawed-off shotgun he totes like a woman's purse. Oh and not to mention his mutated guard hound Dark Nation. No this kid needs security EVERY HOUR OF THE DAMNED DAY. I suppose it's cause he's the Pres' only son. Or rather his only accepted son. After all Director Lazard was just a fuck up created with a slums whore. And now look, he's gone missin'. I wonder how that happened. Sometimes it makes me wonder whether or not it's all a game. Or a show. To entertain the dead pricks up in the Lifestream.

"Rufus will be joining us to evaluate each of the Turks individually. Being the former head of the department, Rufus knows what to look for in our Turks and due to the recent terror activities we need all the evaluation possible." Tseng explained carefully. Sometimes I envied his status of being able to call Rufus, well Rufus, without being shot. I once slipped and I got twenty stitches in my leg from Dark Nation. Rufus nodded and took the seat at the head of the table near Tseng, yet away from everyone else. It was also widely known he HATED to be touched. That was a certain death offense. No escaping that one. Only Tseng could touch the kid. After all, Tseng raised him. The boy's father wasn't very "loving" and that much was obvious. Rufus cleared his throat and turned to Daiki. Daiki and Rufus got along well. Both were wealthy, strict, high-up, blonds.

"What is your weapon of choice?"

"Nunchaku, sir."

"So short-range, correct?"

"Yes sir."

"Hmm."

"Any specialization?"

"Negotiations sir."

Emina tensed as Rufus turned to her. I wanted to reach out and rub her shoulder. She is an ok girl, real straight-laced, but not bad.

"Weapon?"

"Gun, sir."

"Long or short-range?"

"Preferably long, but I can handle short, sir."

"Excellent. Area of specialization?"

"High-pressure situations, sir."

"Very valuable. You'll go far in ShinRa with those specifications."

Emina glowed. It was no secret she had a crush on Rufus. She also had an eye out for Tseng too, and that seemed to be mutual, but it seemed she was really into Rufus. Who wouldn't be, really? He is kinda sexy after all. Like most people in ShinRa, I'm bi-sexual. Almost all SOLDIERs are, since women aren't often allowed into the program. But as a Turk, I am surrounded by hot males AND hot females. So I have a little more variety then the SOLDIERs, and luckily I'm pretty damn good with seduction. I get laid. Heh. What more can I say? Everyone likes a redhead. Oh look, Shou is having a panic attack!

- sigh - "Weapon?"

"Uhh...um..."

With a smirk, I help the kid out. "Knives, rookie?" Shou smacks his forehead to the table. "Y-yes t-thank you s-sir."

"Knives, sir."

"Throwing knives?"

"Uhh.."

"For Shiva's sake! Yes rookie, throwing knives. Forget your name too? It's Shou, by the way." Shou turns and glares at me for making a fool of him. The initial confusion was cute, then it became fuckin' annoying. Rufus obviously felt the same. "Next time, know your own weapons." Shou stuttered out, "Yes sir, sorry sir." Tseng rolled his eyes inconspicuously. Hiro next.

"Primary weapon? Please tell me you know what it is, or I may be forced to shoot you."

"Dual guns, sir."

"You have been referred as personal guard for me. What's your back ground in that area?"

"I was a body guard for Don Corneo, sir."

"I see."

"Are your guns short or long-ranged?"

"One is short and one is long, sir."

"Very good. Prepared."

Suck-up. Ooh Yuuta...

"Answer the previous questions."

"I have no weapon, sir. I am a martial arts expert. As a former Costa del Sol detective, I'm specialized in problem solving, investigations, and interrogations, sir."

"Good."

Interrogations? Don't make me laugh. That's my shit. Whatever, yo. I let out a snort, drawing attention to myself. I held up a hand in apology and waved to signal for them to continue. Kotone, sweet girl that one is, she is shaking. She is usually very bold, but Rufus intimidates her.

"Go on."

"Shotgun, like yourself, sir."

"Excellent weapon."

She perked up a little and smiled. I just might have to 'do' her if she keeps smiling like that...

"I specialize in hunting and tracking, sir."

"Quite a bit like myself, nice to see."

Kotone's smile looked like it might split her face. It was making me dizzy, so I directed my attention to the next unfortunate victim, Ryuu. Haha, my favorite. Ryuu is my little mini-me. Rod-totin', slum drawlin', gang leadin', thief! Ah my little protégé.

"You should know the drill."

"I use a rod, sir. I'm also pretty good with hand-to-hand. An' I specialize in gang activity, theft, covert operations, body guard protection, undercover operations, hacking, vehicles, piloting, escape artistry, assassinations, and mechanics."

Rufus raised an eyebrow. "So many talents? Tell me what you did before Turks, how were you discovered, under what terms were you recruited, and who recruited you." Ryuu nodded. "I was a violent gang leader in the Sector 3 slums, I got cocky an' decided to try ta steal'a ShinRa bike an' I got caught." Rufus' arched eyebrow rose higher. "I would hope so, or I would be worried about our parking garage security." Ryuu smirked slightly. "Nah, sir. I took out the garage security. I got caught by a'drunk Reno. He, pardon my speech, sir, kicked my ass. Well, 'e was impressed an' offered me a job. I was interested in gettin' outta the slums, so I accepted an' he took me under 'is wing. I learned how to use'a rod and some extra skills. He said if I kept loyal, he could get me inta Turks. Well 'e did and I been loyal ever since." Rufus nodded and cocked his head at me. "Good work Reno." I gave a two fingered salute. "Thank ya, thank ya, sir." Rufus turned to Saika next and nodded in her direction.

"I am a strict martial arts user, but my agility allows me to avoid most attacks directed at me. My style is kick-heavy, which allows me some range in comparison to punches. My talents center around split-second decisions, high-pressure situations, and strategies."

Rufus nodded silently and turned to Kazuhiro.

"I use a katana. And I can face high numbers of enemies without panic and succeed in winning the battle."

It was now I noticed, Rufus skipped Cissnei. What was up with that? She noticed too, but said nothing. She kept shooting him looks though. Rufus cleared his throat, and looked down at his papers before looking up again. "Thank you for your time, if you will I need to speak to my first and second in command alone please." All the others stood and went to exit. "Cissnei." She turned to face Rufus. "Yes sir?" She asked politely. "Stay behind." She nodded. I started to get nervous. What would Rufus want with Ciss? She was like the mother of the Turks, everyone loves her. After all she has love in her true name. Aiko, love child. It fit her well. She had a crush on Zack, that much I know. I wonder if this has to do with her break down mid-mission...

"Cissnei, some disturbing information has come to light. And it does not make you look good." Rufus' eyes were ice. Oh Gaia. Here it comes. "May I ask what it is, sir?" Rufus sighed. "It seems you have been aiding our fugitives." I audibly inhaled. Cissnei cringed as if she knew this was coming. She sighed and stood up straight. "Explain my offence and charges, please sir." Rufus took a deep breath. "You were seen allowing Zackary Fair to escape from capture. As well as misleading your fellow Turks into thinking he escaped on his own. And providing a ShinRa issue motorcycle." I let my head fall to the table. What have you done, Aiko? "It seems only right to have you dishonorably discharged." Cissnei relaxed a bit. I mentally groaned. She didn't understand that it meant me or Tseng will have to kill her. "I understand, sir." I raised my head with tired eyes. "Would you like me to escort her out, sir?" As much as I liked Aiko, she was a traitor. And ShinRa was more important than her and more important than me. Rufus nodded without looking at me. At least I could make this easy for her, I thought as I stood, motioning towards the door for her.

She followed me out into the hall. We walked to the "Discharge Room" in silence. Most thought that the room had a place to put your weapons and uniform and an elevator which led outside. Nope, it had a place to put your weapons and a easily cleaned tile floor. We entered quietly. I locked the door behind us. Everyone saw us walking to the room. Shou avoided our eyes, I made a mental note to kill that little asshole in revenge. Cissnei changed back into Aiko, taking off her Turk jacket and placing her weapon on the table. By now I think she had an idea of what was going on. It killed me to know this had to happen. When she was done, she turned to me with sad eyes and said softly, "Tell Zack my real name please." I nodded solemnly and took out my gun. I checked the cartridge, it was full. With a sigh, I pointed it at her. I couldn't look, so I stared at the ground, putting on the silencer, flicking off the safety, and finally pulling the trigger. One shot. That's all it took. I was thankful I had perfect aim even when I wasn't looking. I didn't look back I just left the room with the face of a dead man.


	5. Futile Resistance

**Cracked Visage**

**Futile Resistance**

This food wasn't all that bad once you got used to it. After five years in a vat of mako, anything tastes good. Even cold pea soup and stale bread. Well it was the only liquid food they had for cheap, and since Cloudy wasn't really all that lively and I needed to feed him and all, I thought it was fine. I wish Cloud would wake up. I miss his little remarks and deep red blushes. Cloud could be so cute. And when he was miffed, he got cuter. I made sure to call him 'Spike' often, since it garnered a huff and pout. His pout was his perfected skill. I, and most everyone else, couldn't resist its charm. He's so damn small and cute. It was one of the things that attracted me to him initially. Usually I'm more of a ladies man really. I've been with a couple guys, but never in a relationship. More like desperate sex brought on by long, drawn out missions away from home and ladies. But Cloud... Cloud was special. There was something about him that makes me want to protect him and love him. I still have yet to tell him that too... I remember when he first said it...

- Flashback -

Zack and Cloud are laying across the couch in Zack's apartment. Zack has his arm over Cloud's waist. Cloud is reading a book to prepare for the upcoming SOLDIER exams. Cloud keeps shrugging Zack off every time he tries to nuzzle his neck. "Zack, stop. I'm trying to concentrate so I can pass this exam. Then I can be a SOLDIER like you and we can celebrate or something." Zack blew out air and put on a fierce pout. "Aw come on Cloudy! I wanna cuddle!" Cloud muttered something like "Zack the Puppy alright," before closing his book and turning around in Zack's arms. "Cuddle, huh?" Zack nodded, his face bright with hope. Cloud smirked slightly. "Ok I'll give you cuddling." Cloud launched himself forward in Zack's arms. Zack laughed and rolled back, pulling Cloud on top of him. "Mmm... I could get used to this..." Zack purred as Cloud nipped at his ear. Their relationship was still young, but it felt like they were perfect for each other. Zack's hyper and Cloud's quiet attitude balanced each other. And for the first time, for Zack, it wasn't only about sex with a guy. He always thought he would only have relationships with feelings with women. But here was Cloud and his innocence.

Cloud was too innocent really. Too young to understand why Zack wanted sex so often and acted annoyed to be refused, too naïve to understand he was the current object of Zack's lust. He just assumed that Zack was sleeping with other people. He never expected him to be faithful. After all, Zack was a First Class SOLDIER, what would he want with a virgin cadet? But unbeknownst to him, Zack was being very faithful. Cloud was too good to cheat on. Zack knew he was lucky to land such a sweet, beautiful, smart, strong, and caring person. He had no intention to ever give him up. Even now looking as Cloud's eyes slowly drooped with sleepiness, Zack was overrun with emotion he had never felt before, aside from Aeris of course. But it couldn't be the same, could it? He was sure he was in love with Aeris. How could he feel that for Cloud? He was content in liking Cloud a lot, but love? He wasn't ready for that yet. Zack pondered this as he lifted Cloud, carrying his small lover to his room. And yet, as he laid Cloud down the boy whispered something so softly Zack had to even strain his SOLDIER hearing to catch it, and though he thought he didn't love Cloud, why did four simple words fill him with such warmth?

"I love you, Zack."

- End of Flashback -

Cloud is worth the hassle. He is worth every second of my time. He is worth more in fact, but this was all I had to give for now. But things will change soon. We can get work, I'm sure of it. So far all we've got was a couple deliveries, but hell Gil is Gil. As long as I can feed Cloud, I'll be fine. I can withstand hardship better than him, I was a First Class SOLDIER after all. At least there aren't too many SOLDIERs walking around the slums, so for now we are safe. I haven't gotten up the nerve to go see Aeris yet. I'm afraid to hurt her. She was an angel, but Cloud is my true light. He brightens my days even when I think the sun will never shine again. It's funny that his name is Cloud, since when he is around my skies never have one. He makes me smile constantly and mean it even when I don't want to. He is so important to me. I could never bear to lose him. So I will do anything to keep him safe. So here I am, petting his hair and slowly feeding him soup. But no matter what I will always lov... Oh Shiva no. Reno.

x-x-x

I need'a break. Nah, I need a drink. Heh, so I guess this place will have ta do. I suppose I could go have a drink on the plate, but ya know, the best alcohol comes from the slums. They know how to make it down here. Not to mention, all they serve on the plate is expensive wine and cheeses. The Nook. Some crappy bar/diner. It will have to do, I can't wait anymore. It's kinda dirty in here... Whatever, yo. The alcohol is all that matters at this point. "What will it be?" The bartender is suspicious. I don't blame'em. I'm pretty shady character in this suit. An' I'm armed. Well then he should know not ta fuck with me. "Scotch." The man whips the drink up fast. Who the hell is he lookin' at? I take my goggles off my head and inspect'em. They reflect behind me. Holy...

x-x-x

Time to sneak away. Quietly stack the dishes. Throw some Gil on the table. Put a jacket over Cloud's conspicuous hair. Wrap an arm around him and prepare to leave. Slam! Dammit. In slides Reno into the seat across from us, slamming his glass down. Fuck it. "Heya Zack." My eye twitches. "Hello Reno." He smirks. "No need to be formal, man, I'm off duty." I relax a bit. I know Reno doesn't do ANY work off duty. "What do you want, Reno? We're just trying to stay alive here." He leans back and pulls out a cigarette. The man behind the counter yells "No smoking.," Reno flips him off and lights the cigarette. "I don' want nothin'. I was just lookin' for someone ta drink with, yo." I shrug and call to the bartender for a beer. The man brings it, shooting us suspicious glances. "Fine." Reno closes his eyes and puts his head in his hands. Something's wrong. Reno isn't one for looking stressed. "I had ta kill'er, ya know. She wasn' supposed ta help ya." Oh no... "C-Cissnei?" Reno nods. "Yeah, her. She wanted me to tell ya her real name. It was Aiko. She's dead now, yo. Rufus gave the order." I snarl making Cloud flinch in my arms unconsciously. "You didn't have to follow it!," I growled out. Reno raised his head enough to shoot me a glare. I froze. Reno didn't usually look that pissed, even when he was angry. This glare was sheer hatred. "I follow my orders, unlike someone I know." That hurt. I was known for following my orders no matter what back in SOLDIER. But now that I disobeyed one, and left SOLDIER, my reputation is tarnished permanently? I guess so.

Reno was officially scaring me. He really looked upset. Reno has killed thousands and never batted an eyelash. In fact, Reno is extremely sadistic. He loves to torture people, why was one woman upsetting him so much? I've seen him LICK blood off his hands. I swear the Turks are all crazy, blood-lusting, freaks. If it wasn't for the mako in their blood, preventing all diseases, I would expect them all to have AIDS from overexposure to slum rat blood. "What's up with you, Reno? I wouldn't expect you to care so much." Another hate glare. "Aiko did NOTHING wrong, 'sides help you! It's your fault. She liked you, ya know. Liked ya a lot. It was heart-breakin'. But you wouldn't care, after all you are a FUGITIVE. You used to be my best friend. How could you do this to me? To ShinRa? Even when you're gone you still screw me over!" I recoiled slightly. I knew my leaving ShinRa would upset Reno like this. We were close. Best friends. Drinking buddies. And of course, old fling. Just a couple times together was all it was. No feelings. At least not for me, and I assumed the same for him. Reno of the Turks. The Playboy of ShinRa Electric Power Company. He has slept with almost all the secretaries and female employees. Half the SOLDIERs. And the majority of the rest of the male workers. I wouldn't be surprised if screwing Reno wasn't part of the job description. Why would there be feelings for me? Ridiculous right? Well now, hearing this, I'm not so sure.

Reno just shook his head and placed it back in his hands. "-- that good?" I heard him whisper. "Whaa?" I responded, not hearing the question. "Is he really that good?" He asked a bit louder. My cheeks lit up. I could have sworn the same happened to Cloud. "I.. uhh.. we.. We haven't slept together. Yet." I said sheepishly while adjusting my collar. Reno raised an eyebrow. "Liar." I growled at that. "I do NOT lie!" Reno raised his head up with obvious shock. "You mean you left ShinRa for a PROSPECTIVE fuck!? Not even a good lay? A PROSPECTIVE one?" I narrowed my eyes. "I left _ShinRa _because I was held captive and TORTURED for FIVE years, Reno! AND you didn't see what _ShinRa_ was creating in that mako reactor in Nibelheim. Monsters, Reno! Monsters! With mako! So what does that make us SOLDIERs, hmm? Monsters in-training? I will not be a part of that! Cloud had no future there anyway. How could he? He is mako sensitive, he could never handle the constant mako exposure of SOLDIER. And look at him! He is small, Reno. He was bullied and picked on for that. And can't you imagine what would happen now that everyone knows he is the one who killed SEPHIROTH! It would be hell for him. And for me. Can't you understand that?" Reno closed his eyes again and nodded softly.

"I'm sorry, Zack. But that doesn't change my job. Keep running. Then maybe one day we can be on the same team again. Just not ShinRa." And with that Reno stood and left. I slumped forward in my seat. Tears stung the corners of my eyes. I looked to Cloud and smiled softly. "You're worth it." I assured him and myself. Slowly, I stood dragging Cloud up with me. Together we limped out of the diner. Together. Always together.

x-x-x

In a bar in Sector 7, a meeting was underway. AVALANCHE. Terrorists. Or saviors? They preferred to believe the latter. AVALANCHE was just reforming anew. New members. New leader. Same goal. Take down ShinRa and everyone inside it. For Marlene. For Nibelheim. For the Planet. For Elfé.

x-x-x

"This place will have to work for tonight, Cloudy." We were camping out in a small alley in Sector 7. It was kinda dirty, but it would do. At least the plate above shielded the slums from rain. It sounded like it was pouring up there. All the water is directed out of Midgar by pipe systems and sewers. And the chance of a leak was very rare. The plates were built with mako-tempered steel. Strongest stuff on Gaia. The rain did lower the temperature down here though. I watched Cloud shiver softly. My brows furrowed. "I'll be right back, Cloud. I'm gonna go find us some blankets or something." I imagined he nodded and I turn to go search for warmth. Yet before I go, I swing around and press my lips to Cloud's forehead and then his lips. "Be right back, love." Now where to find discarded blankets? I checked around the dumpsters and in other alleyways, yet found nothing. Ah ha! Some material scraps! "Well, well." Oh Gaia. "Looks like I found the fugitive. The bossman will be very pleased with this." I whirl around quickly, just in time to be struck over the head with a rod by what looks to be a Reno wanna-be. It sucks how close he was, I didn't even notice till it was too late. Damn Turk stealth.


	6. Misplaced Memories

**Cracked Visage**

**Misplaced Memories**

I hate it when it rains. I always think about the grey clouds that will be above the plate, out of my reach. It seems Clouds and I don't mix well. They are always out of reach for me. Wallowing in my sorrow, I drag the trash out. Barret should be doing this. He lives at my bar. I cook for his daughter. I run the hide out for AVALANCHE for Gaia's sake! I should at least get some help cleaning up. Just cause I'm strong from martial arts, doesn't mean this trash isn't heavy! One of these days.. I'm gonna... Oh Shiva.

x-x-x

"What is it you needed, Ryuu?" The young sandy redhead smirked at Tseng's voice over the PHS. "I've got Target Z."

x-x-x

"Cloud wake up! Wake up! It's me! Ti--" With a fast inhaled breath, the small blond sat straight up, gasping out, "Zack!" There was a woman in front of him. She seemed familiar. Her eyes darkened at hearing Zack's name. "Cloud it's me Tifa. Remember me?," She asked with a falsely sweet voice. Inside her head a voice raged. "Why did he say his name!?" Cloud shook his head. Everything was blurry. "Ti-fa? I don't remember. I don't remember anything. Only that Zack was with me. Where is he?" Tifa's heart clenched hearing her true lover say he didn't remember her, but she understood there was something wrong with him. "No one was here with you Cloud. I found you here in this alleyway, alone. Zack isn't here. In fact, I haven't seen Zack in five years." Cloud's eyes widened. "No he was right here! Just a second ago! He promised! His sword is here too!" He gestured to the sword next him. Cloud started to rock. Tifa's eyes welled up with tears. "Shh.. Shh.. It's ok. I'm here now. I won't leave you." Cloud looked at her. She seemed to know him, and she looked familiar to him but nothing more. "Who are you? I know your name is Tifa." She perked up slightly. "You remember my name!?" Cloud shook his head sadly, unhappy to disappoint her. "No you said your name a few minutes ago." She slumped again, but immediately rose back up with a smile. "Well then I will have to refresh your memory! But let's head inside, it's cold out here." Cloud nodded and stood.

They went inside Seventh Heaven to warm up. Tifa had a plan. Cloud would be hers and only hers. Zack doesn't deserve him.

x-x-x

"How might I ask did you stumble upon him?" Rufus had an eyebrow raised at the young Turk. "Well ya see sir, I was headin' to this bar in Sector 7 called Seventh Heaven since they got this girl their with the biggest chest I've ever seen, and I saw 'im stumblin' 'round the alley. I snuck up on 'im an' knocked him out cold. Then I dragged him back here. He didn' have the other fugitive with him. An' he'sa SOLDIER, so I figured he would be wakin' up quick. That's why I left the scene without lookin' for Target C too." Tseng kept his eyes on the restrained and sedated ex-SOLDIER lying on the table. Rufus nodded and seemed to except Ryuu's story. The door suddenly flew open and in rushed Reno. "Sorry I'm late sir. You wanted to see... What's he doing here?" Reno went from frantic to frighteningly calm in milliseconds. "I caught'em!" Ryuu gushed, looking for praise from his mentor. Reno smirked and clapped Ryuu on the back in congratulations. Ryuu beamed. It was obvious the older Turk had a strong influence on the younger. "Reno and Ryuu, take him to a cell on floor 67." Both nodded and grabbed one half of Zack's body. Together they carried him out of the room.

x-x-x

"Welcome to the Headquarters of AVALANCHE!" Cloud looked around the underground room. It was impressive. A high-tech computer and huge t.v., a table, and a punching bag in the corner. "What's AVALANCHE?" Tifa smiled. "A group of people dedicated to saving the planet!" Cloud let out a low whistle. "Like recycling and stuff?" Tifa let out a small, musical laugh and shook her head. "No bigger. we are an anti-ShinRa organization." Cloud stiffened. "ShinRa?" Tifa nodded. "Yeah. Something wrong?" Cloud nodded and looked at her. His face was worried. "I was part of ShinRa, Tifa. I'm not anymore, but I was." Tifa blinked and started slowly, "Well that's ok. You left them. Now you can help us save the planet. And redeem yourself." Cloud shrugged. "I suppose." Tifa shifted a bit. "Cloud..." He turned to her. "Yes Tifa?" She looked at him. "Would you like to help us with our next mission? We are going to blow up a mako reactor in Sector 1." Cloud smiled softly and nodded. Tifa erupted with joy. "Thank you so much, Cloud! You might be the thing that makes our mission a success! And we'll pay you of course." Cloud nodded and examined a dagger laying on the table. A screeching alerted the two to more people coming down. A huge, black man descended along with two other men and a young woman.

"Yo Tifa! Who da hell is he? You know you can't bring strangers down here! Shi'! He could be with ShinRa!" Tifa rolled her eyes. "Calm down Barret, Cloud is a childhood friend of mine. He is an ex-SOLDIER, but he says he will help us with the next mission." The black man approached Cloud menacingly. "You still workin' for ShinRa, punk?" Cloud's eyes grew cold and he stood up straight. It looked like he may have grown a bit too. "Not a chance. I'm against ShinRa." The man nodded and extended a hand. Cloud shook it and took notice that the other hand was replaced with a gun grafted on. "Barret." "Cloud." The young woman came forward with a slight gleam in her eye. "Jessie." The smaller of the two men left came forward next and extended a hand to Cloud. "Biggs." Last was the heavy-set man. "Wedge." Cloud nodded at everyone. Another screeching and down came a little girl. "Papa!," she squealed as she ran into the black man's arms. Cloud thought it was weird since the girl was extremely pale, but he paid no mind. Tifa gestured to the young girl. "That's Marlene. She's Barret's daughter." Cloud nodded.

Barret sat down in a chair and face everyone. "Let's talk 'bout the mission."

x-x-x

"Move! Move! Let's go!"

"Come on spiky!"

"Set the bomb!"

"Ten minutes to detonation!"

"Jessie!"

"Door1 unlocked!"

"Door2 unlocked! Hurry!"

"Get out of here!"

"Ten seconds!"

- BOOM -

x-x-x

What the fuck was that? Aw shit, yo. Terrorist attack. Time for work. - brriiinng - " 'Ello?"

"Yes, sir. On my way." Damn you AVALANCHE, I still had an hour I paid for with that girl.

x-x-x

"HELL YEAH!"

"WOOT!"

"Convene at the train station!"

x-x-x

This mission was too easy. It won't be like that next time. I think I may hate Barret. He's too loud. Then again, I'm just extra quiet right now. With what Tifa told me... I don't know anymore. If I'm supposed to love her like she tells me... then what about Zack?

Slam "Sorry." I mumble looking at the person I ran into. I blink. She's beautiful. "It's ok. Are you hurt?" She has a musical voice too. "Yeah, I'm fine." I bend down to help her pick up her stuff. Flowers? You don't seem too many of them around Midgar. "Do you know what's going on?" I look up at her. "Uhh... No, I was just trying to get away from the panic." She nods. "Oh ok. Would you like to buy a flower?" I nod dumbstruck by her. She giggles. "One Gil, please." I pull out a note and hand it to her. She picks out a lily and hands it to me. "Thank you." I say softly. She smiles a blinding white smile. "You're very welcome. Have a nice day." She walks away. Wow. Now I'm even more confused.

x-x-x

"That mission went well. But we're not done yet. We still have more reactors. Our next target is the reactor in Sector 5." Everyone nods at Barret. As everyone heads for the food I pull him aside. "What about my pay?" He snorts. "Here." He hands me an envelope. I can already tell there is a problem by how light it is. I open it. 1,500 Gil? He has got to be kidding me. "1,500? I won't do the next one for less than 3,000.," I say coldly. He narrows his eyes. "Hell no, spiky. You will take what you get." I shrug. "Fine, then obviously you don't need me." I hit the button on the pinball machine which takes me to the bar level. I head for the door. "Cloud wait!" I sigh softly. Just let me go Tifa. "You can't leave! What about the planet?" I snort. "The planet isn't worth the pay. I have to eat you know." And with that I turn to go. "Wait. I'll pay the three thousand." Just as I move to say something, Barret comes up. "Don't pay him shi' Tifa! He's just a pansy SOLDIER boy." I open my mouth to retort, but Tifa beats me to it. "Don't you dare insult him! And we need him! Pay him the three thousand!" Barret shifts nervously. "That was for Marlene's schoolin'. Fine, I'll pay ya two thousand. Nothin' more." I agree only because I need the money. But as soon as I can, I'm gonna get the hell out of this organization to go find Zack.


	7. Welcomed Comfort

**Cracked Visage**

**Welcomed Comfort**

Well that mission was a bust. Sure we destroyed the reactor, but now I'm dead. Or at least it feels like it. "Hello! Hello!" Huh? My eyes feel heavy, but I force them open. There she is. The angel of the slums. "Hi." I croak out. She giggles. "You know you're the second man to come falling through my church's roof? He was cute too. But you might be cuter." I smile softly. "I never caught your name." I slowly stand, brushing off the dust. "Aeris." She is very beautiful. Her brunette curls, the pink bow in her hair, her pink dress, her green eyes, everything. "I'm Cloud." She smiled again. I can't breathe, so I look around. Flowers... growing? In Midgar? Wow. She can even make the planet do strange things. "Well hello lil'sis. And Cloudy-kins." I wheel around to face the voice. Red hair, green eyes, red tattoos under his eyes, Turk suit? He seems familiar. "Cloud! Wanna job? Can you be my body-guard?" Aeris runs behind me. The man's eyes widen. "Oh dear this is hilarious. What would Zack say?" The man proceeded to bust into laughter. Both me an Aeris tensed. "You know Zack!?," We both blurted out. I turned to her. "You know Zack too?" She nodded. I put a hand to my head and rubbed my temple to ward off the coming headache.

"Know Zack? AHAHAHA! I think everyone in this room knows Zack pretty well if ya know what I mean, yo. Or rather, he did say you two hadn't slept together yet, Cloudy, and I hear your a virgin Aeris... So I guess I know Zack the best, yo!" I growled. "There is no way Zack would sleep with a low-life like you!" The man quieted a bit. "Oh well he did. A couple times actually. I think he had plans to sleep with you too, Cloud, so you aren't out of the loop completely. 'Sides, me an Zack were together a LONG time ago, yo. Not since Nibelheim. Fuck man, ya know, I got every reason ta hate ya. Ya KILLED the Gen, yo! You stole both my best friends in different ways. Ya had ta steal Zack's heart, and then killed Seph. Fuck. You suck, yo. But whatever the man is in love with ya, even if he won' say it. Been faithful to ya too. Not slept with one girl or guy. None of his old flings could say that much, yo. And for you to have not been sleeping with him, leaving him sexless, you must be awesome in some way. Well he's with me and the Turks for a'bit. I'm tryin' to get 'im out, but it's kinda hard with all the surveillance, yo." I narrowed my eyes. "How can I believe you. I don't remember anything. So I have no idea if me and Zack were together or not. And from what a friend of mine says, I'm her boyfriend and I love her. She says I was going to propose to her. How do I know Zack isn't simply my best friend?"

The man snorted. "Sounds like jealousy. Is it that cute, busty, girl from Nibelheim? The one you saved at the reactor there? What was it? Tif? Tima?" I growl out a correction on Tifa's name. He laughs. "Yeah her. She hates Zack, ya know. She blames SOLDIER for her papa's death." He uses a fake sweet tone for the word "Papa". "I can assure ya, you an' Zack are together. Or at least ya like each other, yo. But he still has feelings for lil'sis behind'ya. Or he's too afraid to break up with 'er. I think it's the second one. But whatever, yo. I gotta get somewhere, so I'll see'ya and I'll tell Zack you woke up, he just might start cryin' again. He cried over ya the other day, yo. He is really inta ya." The man turned to leave, but stopped. "Don't hurt him, Cloud. He doesn't deserve it. He's given his life, friends, girlfriend, family, job, everything up for you. I talked to him about it. All he said was, 'He's worth it.'" And with that closing statement he left. I fell to my knees in shock and confusion. Aeris sat down next to me. "Are you ok, Cloud?" How can she be so kind? She just found out I was dating her boyfriend and she's worried about me? She must be an angel. I fall into her arms and take comfort from the only selfless person left on Gaia.

x-x-x

"So you can't remember anything?" I shake my head. We are sitting on top of a child's playground. Aeris is sweet. She says, "As long as it makes you and Zack happy, it's a good thing. I still have a chance at love, every day I'm alive." She rubs my back softly with a smile. "It will come to you." I look up at her. "I hope so." She placed a small kiss on my forehead. No wonder Zack was in love with her. "Hey is that Tifa?" I look up quickly. Sure enough, Tifa is being carted around on the back of a chocobo-drawn carriage... In the skimpiest dress in creation. Oh Gaia.

x-x-x

"President ShinRa, you wanted to see me sir?"

"Tell me what are your attachments to Sector 7?"

"Little ta none, sir."

"Good. Because we are dropping the plate. And you are the one who will do it, Reno."

A slow smile spread over my face. "With pleasure, sir."

x-x-x

I will not do this.

"Come on, Cloud! We have to save Tifa!"

"No."

"Do you want her to go the Don?"

"...No.."

"Then come out."

"... Fine."

"Oh Miss Cloud! You are so cute!"

x-x-x

Shiva save me. He's gonna kiss me. Oh Gaia! "AHHHHHHHHHHHH..." My scream echoes through the entire room.

x-x-x

"Cloud! Thank you for rescuing me! But now we have to save the plate from dropping." I nod. I'm still traumatized. He nearly did it. I was so close to being kissed by the most disgusting man on Gaia. Holy shit. This could drive me to drink. Not to mention... twitch that guy was there. The Don called him Reno. He got a fucking PICTURE. Why must Shiva hate me? Now we have to run as fast as we can to save the plate and slums. I doubt we will make it, but we can still try... Zack would never give up, so I won't either. We're close now, at the pillar. Tifa is sending Aeris to save Marlene. I don't want her to go, she could get hurt... Zack would never forgive me. But then again, that little girl deserves a chance too and Zack might not forgive me even more if she didn't get one, so I say nothing. Me and Tifa begin our climb. Jessie, Biggs, Wedge... All of them are hurt. They won't make it if the plate drops. More incentive on our parts then. Or more guilt...

x-x-x

Time to finally get rid of this hell-hole! This is a good day. Wish I had some scotch...

x-x-x

I failed. Nothing more, I failed. Everyone is going to die. Jessie, Biggs, Wedge, Marlene... Aeris... That Turk will pa... "Aeris!" She's alive. That's all that matters. "Tifa, don't worry she's safe!" The helicopter begins to fly away. "AERIS!," I scream. "Rescue me, Cloud!" Don't worry I will Aeris. I will.

x-x-x

Aw shit that hurt, yo. Cloudy just kicked my ass, maybe he is stronger than I thought... I got to go tell Zack! "Zaaaacckkk!" I whine, knocking on his door with my left fist since my right was obviously broken. I enter the room with a smirk. "What do you want, Reno?" He is withering away without his Cloud. Good thing I'm here to give him good news then. "Hey guess what? Your pretty blond just kicked my ass! You train him yourself?" Zack perked up and smiled. "Yeah I did. Is he awake?" I nod. Zack's grin could split his face in half. Gaia, I love his smile. "You look like shit Reno." I shrug even though it hurts. "I know, when don't I?" He laughed a bit. Captive or not he was still human and needs human contact. I pull out Cloudy's girly picture to show him. It hurt to do so, but it was worth it to see more of that smile. He erupted into fits of choking laughter, I sat down on the edge of his bed and laughed with him. The sharp intakes of air hurt bad, man, maybe I am really fucked this time...

x-x-x

ShinRa Midgar Headquarters. I was hoping not to ever have to return here. Whatever. Aeris is here and so is Zack. I will get them back.

x-x-x

"This is too easy." I muse out loud. Barret snorts. "Maybe it's cause you flirtin' with all the guards, spiky. Is everyone in SOLDIER gay?" I shake my head. "No we're bi." Barret rolled his eyes. Tifa cocked her head. "Why?" I turned to her. "Because mostly men are recruited to SOLDIER, but there are plenty of secretaries. But out on long missions, sometimes the SOLDIERs get well.. frustrated." Tifa blushed and turned away. "Well that's how Zack explained it to me." Tifa tensed. "Who's Zack? Your ol' boyfriend?" I shook my head. "No, it seems he is my current boyfriend, according to Reno. And I believe him." Tifa whipped around. "Reno? The Turk who just dropped the plate? You listen to him? Besides I already told you about you and I, Cloud." I turned to look at her with slightly icy eyes. "Reno knows Zack. I know it. I remember asking Zack who his ex'es were and he named Reno in there. And Reno didn't hurt me or Aeris when he had us alone. I don't like him, but he and I have some sort of truce over Zack. And as for _us_, we never were and if I find Zack here, we never will be." With that I turned away. I heard her sniffle. "Damn spiky, that was kind of cold." Tifa shook her head. "No he's right. I should have never deceived him. We weren't, but I wish we were. I'm sorry." I nodded as the elevator reached the 68th floor.

The doors opened to reveal two Turks. Dammit. One girl and one guy. "Hello AVALANCHE, allow us to introduce ourselves. My name is Emina and this is Daiki. We are going to kill you now."

x-x-x

The girl used a gun, yet she was no match for Barret and the guy was a nunchaku user. They're dead now. Easy. Too easy in all honesty. Our whole breaking into ShinRa seemed too easy. It's almost like they wanted us to do this. I hate being a puppet. There she is. Aeris. Oh Gaia. Not him. Please Shiva not him. Not Hojo. I fall to my knees, mind buzzing with blocked out memories of torture. "Ah Specimen C, nice to see you again. Specimen Z has missed you." I shake with barely suppressed fury. "DON'T CALL US THAT!" It explodes my pain, my hurt, my fear, all of it. Flashes of Zack bleeding on the cliffs outside of Midgar. Flashes of being stuck in a tank of mako. Flashes of my hometown burning. I rush at him. Barret stops me. I turn on him. I nearly kill him before she stops me. Soothes me. "Cloud! Don't let him win!" I fall down again. Aeris... Thank you. I pass out.

x-x-x

"You're getting some company, Zack." I shrug. I don't care unless it's Cloud. They toss someone in. My breathing stops. "...Aeris?" She stirs. "Zack." She smiles at me. That smile. I wish I could look away so it didn't hurt. "Why are you here?" I choke out. "Oh well I got captured when Reno dropped the plate, but Cloud came to rescue me from Hojo. But then he had a break down and I had to help him, but he'll be fine. He is very sweet. I like him. He is a good choice for you. He needs you to cheer him up!" I nearly have a heart attack. "Y-you know a-about Cl-Cloud?," I ask quietly. She smiles again. "Yeah Reno told us about it. He says you love him. How could you not? Cloud is adorable! But he needs love in his life, you are a really good pair." I choke on a sob. "Thank you, Aeris." She walks over and pets my forehead. "No problem, you deserve to be happy."

x-x-x

Where am I? My eyes flick open. A cell, great. Oh wait... why is out door open? I look over. Tifa is on another cot. The door is wide open. I stand and walk over. There is blood all over the hallway. I walk out. At the end of the hall is a dead Turk. He had a keycard... Name badge says "Shou - Knives." It looks like the Turks are losing a lot right now. I head back to my cell and wake Tifa. "Cloud?," She asks as I shake her. "Tifa, come on, we are escaping." She jumps up quickly. We run to the cell next door. We open it to find Barret and some cat... dog thing... "Come on we are getting out of here." I say quickly. The... thing approaches me. "Hello we didn't get to meet previously. I am Red XIII." I was shocked to say the least that it could talk, but I still acknowledged it. "I'm Cloud." Red bowed slightly. "Nice to meet you, Cloud." I nod at him and turn to go to the last room. I slide the keycard through the lock. The door is forced open asI begin to open it. A fist comes crashing toward my face. I catch it and look up at my attacker. Tears flood my eyes as I meet familiar blue eyes. I fall into Zack's arms happy to finally be "home."


	8. Stained Innocence

**Cracked Visage**

**Stained Innocence**

"Zack..." Oh Gaia is it good to hear him say my name after months of him being comatose. It was so good to hold him. He is so beautiful. "Cloud. Cloud." All I can do is sob his name. It's perfect. All is good in the world suddenly. As long as I have him, nothing can touch me. "Are you hurt? How did you get here?" I smile softly. He is always looking out for people. "No. I was caught off guard by a Turk about two weeks ago. He knocked me out and carried me back here. You were in the alleyway. I see you kept my sword safe." He looked at me with his tear-filled eyes and smiled a bright smile. His entire being lit up and I felt my heart clench in my chest. He was so perfect. "Yeah. But unfortunately I had to use it. I know you don't like to use it since it was Angeal's, but it was kind of life and death." I shook my head softly. "It's fine, Cloudy. As long as it was to protect you I'm fine with it." Cloud smiled sheepishly. "I kinda had to protect everyone. Aeris, Tifa, Barret... And of course I needed to try to stop Reno from dropping the plate..." Cloud's eyes darkened sadly. "I failed at that though." I picked up his chin and made him look at me. "Reno is twisted. And he's fast, smart, and strong. I got to see what you did up close, you did the best you could. And you saved some people, so you're a hero in my eyes." Cloud buried himself in my arms. I was blissfully ignorant of the glares coming from Tifa and the disturbed looks from the large black man. However, I could feel Aeris' smiles. But at that moment Cloud was all that mattered.

"We need to get out of here. Like now." I saw the logic in Cloud's thinking, but I was reluctant to move and ruin this perfect moment. Then I got some inspiration. "Hey Cloud.. When Reno came to visit me... he kinda showed me an interesting pic..." I couldn't finish. Cloud crushed his mouth to mine to block the words. Aeris giggled. He pulled back and growled. "Not. A. Word." I laughed and hugged him tight. "Ok Cloudy. But I will NEVER forget. Now let's get out of here." Cloud stepped back, taking my buster sword off his back. "Here, this is yours." I shook my head. "It's yours now. You took care of it, you fought with it, you saved lives with it. It is a symbol of my honor and my dreams. And I share my honor and dreams with you. Angeal gave it to me when he knew I was finally a man. And now I give it to you." Cloud's teary eyes overflowed again. "But it's yours. What would you use?" I put a hand on my chin in contemplation. "Uhh... I will find something, but the sword is yours. It's what I feel is right." Cloud nodded, spinning the sword before settling it on his back. I raised an eyebrow. "Oh? Already have a special move, huh? Nice touch." He smiled softly before turning to the rest of the group, wipping his tears, and barking out orders. "Alright. Everyone stick together. Two groups. Me, Zack, and Aeris make group 1 and Barret, Tifa, and Red make group 2. We move together. I think it would be best to check out what caused so much trouble before we get out, so we are following the blood trail. Be weary of SOLDIERs and Turks. We met little resistance in getting in, but I have a feeling that's changed now."

The large black man, Barret I suppose, growled a little. "Yo spiky! Since when di' you get voted AVALANCHE leader? Last time I check it was me." Cloud rolled his eyes. "I don't care. But at the moment Zack and I are the only ones who can get around this building. But if you wanna be the leader, be my guest." Aeris held up a hand. "No. I think you should be the leader Cloud. You are one of the best fighters. You know the building. And you make a good leader." Cloud shrugged. "So does Zack." She shook her head. "No, I still vote you. I have a feeling about it, and my feelings don't often lead me astray." Tifa looked at Cloud and nodded. "I vote Cloud too." Red looked between Cloud and Barret and agreed with Aeris and Tifa. I added my vote for Cloud, making it 4 to 0, if Barret and Cloud's votes don't count. "Well then, it's decided! Cloudy you are our fearless leader." I clapped my hand on his back with a smile. He just smiled a bit and motioned for us to get moving.

x-x-x

That sonovabitch. Daiki. Emina. Cissnei. And even Shou. Four Turks in the space of a few weeks to days. All because of, in one way or another, Cloud. Even more reason ta hate him. Oh well, this new girl looks promising. Elena. Emina's lil' sister. I have a feeling she might even go farther than Emina in the Turks. I hope so for her sake, yo. She truely wants to rise out of her father and sister's shadow. I wish 'er luck. Damn I'm down for count for awhile. Ryuu and Rude are flyin' me outta Midgar... I can't even fly a damn bird. Dammit.

x-x-x

We got stopped by a Turk on floor 69. "Names Yuuta, and I'm here to kick your ass." Zack chuckled at the guy's comment. I found it rather idiotic as well. He is faced with terrible odds. Not to mention, it's obvious he is a martial arts guy. It's his funeral. Zack took the defensive since he had no weapon. Aeris used her Restore Materia to heal, only furthering nmy belief that she is an angel. I was offense. Too easy. He put up a good fight, until I used Braver. After that, a Bolt from my Lightning Materia and he was finished. His keycard got us access to floor 70.

- static -

"Hunter to Thief and Stone. Hunter to Thief and Stone. Over."

"Thief to Hunter. What's wrong? Somethin' change?Over."

"Yuuta is dead. Over."

"Oh shit... Over."

"And..."

"Yeah? Over."

"The President is..."

x-x-x

He's dead. The tormentor of Gaia. The leader of ShinRa. The most powerful man on the planet is dead. President ShinRa is dead. Masamune is sticking out of his back. I wonder if that was meant to be irony. Think about it, he invested millions of Gil to develop and make the "Perfect SOLDIER" and here he is with his creation's sword through his heart. I look at Cloud, he seems smug. He is too distracted with the fact that the President of ShinRa Electric Power Company is dead to notice whose sword it is. It's probably better left that way. Barret is doing some form of happy dance. Tifa and Aeris are getting a closer look. Am I the only one who finds this odd? Come on! The man is guarded like crown jewels! Where are his Turks? "I've found his guards." I look at Red. He seems to be the one besides me who sees something wrong here. I approach the closet he is looking in. I sharply inhale. There are two mangled bodies are hung by their jackets neatly. Both are completely skinned and re-dressed. I started to dry heave. I check their coat pockets reluctantly. The larger one had a badge with the information, "Kazuhiro - Katana. Radio Name: Art. TURK - Presidential Guard." Oh Gaia. Kazuhiro. He used to be a big name in my hometown, back when it was honorable to have joined ShinRa. I tucked the Gongagan's ID badge in my pocket and looked at the next.

The smaller had, "Saika - Martial Arts. Radio Name: Fist. TURK - Presidential Guard." She looked a lot like Tifa. "Hey Tifa? Did you have someone related to you by the name 'Saika'?" She looked to me confused. "Yes actually. I had a cousin who trained martial arts with me when I was with Zangan in Nibelheim. She was older by a few years and left just before the town was destroyed. Why Zack?" I shudder. I walk to her and give her the ID badge. Tears fill her eyes. "She and I were close... Is her body..." I stop her. "If you were close you don't want to see her like this. She is unrecognizable anyway." Tifa shook with sobs. I gave her a pat on the back. Cloud hugged her. I had a feeling Cloud might have known her too, but I didn't press the issue. The sound of a helicopter landing disrupted their mourning. "Rufus ShinRa.," I say as I look out onto the tarmac. The blond heir just stepped out of his helicopter. "Time to throw him a welcoming party and inform him of his father's death, huh? He is the new President of ShinRa now." Cloud's voice held contempt and hatred. I couldn't blame him. He walked out the door to the tarmac, I followed closely. I examined the young ShinRa heir. He was handsome, very handsome. Blond, blue eyes, small frame, pale skin, young face. His appearance reminded me slightly of Cloud, yet he had a certain intmidating factor about him. An air of superiority too. He was accompanied by one guard and a creature. A dual-gun wielding man with dark hair. This will be interesting.

x-x-x

What the hell are you doing Rufus? Takin' a helicopter right ta the scene of your father's murder with only one guard an' your mutant dog? You had better not die, ya dumbass. Wait. Why do I care if he survives? Oh yeah, he's the one signing my paychecks now. Damn.

x-x-x

This is cute. The AVALANCHE team is here to welcome me to my Midgar office. Oh how foolish, they assumed I would be upset by my father's death. I could laugh at that. Finally. I wish I could give the man who did it a metal and a place as Vice President. I would, but it might cause some waves inside my company. Oh how long I have waited to hear such sweet words on my tongue! My company. Gaia will soon see how Rufus ShinRa runs things. No more of this idiotic "protect and serve" lie. ShinRa once again rules by fear. Just as my Grandfather did, and his father, and his father before that. I will reclaim the long standing tradtion of ShinRa rule by fear, the one my father thought would turn the people on us. Ha. Let them try. Perhaps the current terrorist attacks are a sign. It is time for change. I once ran the Turks. And I know how to get things done efficiently, unlike my father. When someone needs to die, then they will die, until then they will remain puppets for ShinRa willing or not. Like Cloud Strife and Zackary Fair. Two ex-SOLDIERs with skills beyond anyother. Cloud should have been a Turk. He would have fit in well with them. He has cunning and wit, I acknowledge that. Zackary was well placed in SOLDIER. I have a feeling they may be worth keeping alive.

Oh look at that, Cloud is sending his friends off to begin their escape. I knew he was smart. The other AVALANCHE members hold no value for me. It was one thing when it was Elfé and the Ravens, they had plenty of potential. But of course they were destroyed. Pity. But this Cloud, he holds infinite possiblities, therefore I will actually put effort into keeping him alive. It was a pity to have to order Reno to kill Cissnei, especially now when many of his Turks have been killed in a matter of hours, she did nothing truely wrong. After all, I did order Tseng to keep Zack and Cloud alive, under my father's ever-watchful eyes of course, and he once again proved himself to me by having more loyalty for me than my father. That is why Tseng will never lose his place here. I could even call him a father. He raised me. Healed me when my father's beatings left me wounded. Nursed me back to health after my father ordered experiments on me by Hojo. Trained me to protect myself better than even the Turks could. And always respected where my boundries were... Oh no Hiro, that won't do. I can't have you harming my little puppets. Oh you imbicile. You got blood on my immaculate suit as you died. Damned fool. There Dark Nation can make you a snack. Hmm my action seemed to shock Cloud and Zackary. "He was not ordered to attack.," I state simply. I beileve it is time to leave here. Where is that helicopter Kotone? Ah there you are. "Till we meet next." With that I take my leave, the situation has begone to bore me.

x-x-x

"Sir what about Hiro?"

Oh bother.

"Forget him. Take me to Junon."

She shakes her head.

"Tseng gave me specific orders to have you taken directly to Costa del Sol, sir."

I raise an eyebrow.

"You obey me over Tseng, Turk."

"But sir..."

I've had enough. I've lost nearly all my Turks in twenty-four hours, one more won't hurt.

"Sir! Please don't! I..."

- Chik Chik -

"Please sir, I'll take you to J..."

- BAM -

- static -

"Stone to Hunter. Stone to Hunter. What's going on? Over."

"...- fumbling noises -..."

"Is Rufus safe? Over."

"..."

"HUNTER! Is Rufus safe? Answer. Over."

"Rude this is Rufus. It seems that Kotone has had an accident on the wrong end of my shotgun. I am flying myself to Junon Harbor. Meet me there. Understood?"

"Yes sir. What will we do with Reno, sir? He needs some medical attention. Over."

"He will receive it in Junon. Inform your colleges that you, aside from Tseng and Elena, are the last Turks."

x-x-x

That was strange. Rufus killed one of his own Turks? For shooting at us? Something doesn't add up. But for now, we need to get the hell out of Midgar. I give group 2 , Aeris, and Zack the order to wait for me in the ShinRa lobby. Zack was reluctant. I don't blame him. I don't like being apart either, but it was irrelevant. I dashed towards the vehicle display room and loaded a motorcycle onto a truck. Thank Shiva for grunt hotwiring courses.

x-x-x

What the hell is Cloudy doing? Driving this huge ugly blue thing inside the building. It didn't even have a chance of holding us all anyway. "Uhh.. Cloudy... that won't hold all of us..." He rolled his eyes at me. "It doesn't have to. Group 2 and Aeris will take this truck... I have something better for us Zack." A grin broke out on my face as Cloud unloaded the bike. "Cloud, you're awesome." He smiles. "I know. You drive." I hop on the bike and motion for Cloud to join me. He straddles the bike and wraps his arms around me. I have to force down a tidal wave of dirty thoughts as he does this. Cloud is too innocent for that. Right? Well he was, but now? He's wielding my sword, he is taking charge, he is becoming a hero... Just like I wanted to... But I can see that he's gonna make it there. I don't know if I qualify as a hero, but I know Cloud will be. It fills me with pride. We have to leave Midgar. I know that much. I head for city limits with Cloud on the back of the bike fighting off the persuing SOLDIERs. Here we are, Midgar City Limits. I can see the cliffs I nearly died on. Lovely. The SOLDIERs are falling back now, we are free again. How many times will we have to taste tantalizing bits of freedom before they are revoked and we are forced to earn them again? It's begining to get old really.

I can feel Cloud hug me tighter and put his head on my shoulder. He's tired, I'm tired. We can't do this AVALANCHE thing. It's too much for us. I just want to settle down in a town and rest for awhile. I know that doesn't sound like me, but it wears down on my soul, this running, I just want to take a break. We are heading for Kalm. Kalm. It could be nice there for us. Or maybe even Gongaga. We're both country-boys, so we could fit in nice in my hometown. I'm sure my ma and pa will accept my orientation. It would be calm out there, soothing. We need that. After five years of torture and months of running, me and Cloud need to find some peace. A home. I'd say Nibelheim, but that's not an option... Unless we want to live in a bruned down hell-hole with the worst memories imaginable. I highly doubt that.


	9. Blissful Ignorance

**Cracked Visage**

**Blissful Ignorance**

"I was what?" I couldn't believe it, I wouldn't. I had suspicions concerning my miraculous recovery on the cliffs, but I couldn't even begin to believe that I had died. "You were dead Zack. I h-had to use the R-Revive Materia. I know y-you never wanted to be revived if you died, b-but I couldn't be a-alone y-yet. I'm sorry." I suddenly felt dizzy. Cloud grabbed the handles and started steering. I slumped back into him. Dead? Revive Materia? How could that be true? I told Cloud I never wanted o be revived, but does it even apply here? Did I really not want to come back? I am sure I would have, but still. How could I have died? I even thought the idea over a few days ago; it didn't scare me like this. I suppose that it's true what they say. Ignorance is bliss.

x-x-x

They're all dead. Every last one of 'em. How could I have just seen'em in a meeting a few days ago? Me, Rude, Ryuu, Tseng, and Elena is all that's left. This officially sucks, yo. Now I have no one ta pin the annoying missions on. Turks or not, I didn't really care for the rookies an' lower ranking Turks. I only liked Ryuu really. The girls were cute and all, but hell they could be annoying, yo. Cissnei wasn't like that though. She was an angel in a dark company. Dammit. I wish I had hated the girl. I really hate guilt. God I need ta get laid, yo. I wonder if Ryuu is up for a lesson in important Reno habits yet. He really is hot. He will have no troubles with the ladies. That face of his has an edge to it. The red hair and mako blue eyes just complete the exotic features he has. If he grew it out, we could pass as brothers. He needs some tattoos though. We can get those in Junon at that little parlor I got my Kanji for ShinRa done. Yeah I got a ShinRa tattoo. It's my way of reminding myself that I belong mind, body, and soul to ShinRa. I got the tat after Zack became a fugitive. I was drunk of course, but I still liked it when I woke up. Ryuu needs some face tattoos now too. Then he will ascend ta the next rank of Renoness. Renoness? Where the hell did I pull that out of? I have to suppress a shudder at my very dumb name for being like me.

"Hey Ryuu. Give Rude some time up on the front alone. Come keep me company." Ryuu nodded and climbed in back of the heli with me. Rude caught my drift and put up the metal cabin and cockpit divider. "What did ya need Reno?" Gaia he was so innocent around me. It was real too. He gained a monumental amount of respect after fighting me drunk. It was kinda cute, yo. I ran my fingers through his hair softly. He tilted his head at me but said nothing. "I'm feelin' lonely. Com'ere." He nodded, putting his head on my chest and laying down with me. I continue to stroke his hair. He isn't gay or bi, I know that much, so the fact that he is letting me do this is a huge step. I gotta feeling he sees me as family. I can relate to that. The Midgar slums are a very cruel and unforgiving place. I kiss the top of his head. He relaxes even more. Maybe I don't need ta get laid. Maybe all I need is some one ta hold and ta hold me. "Can you roll over and hold on to me?" I ask this quietly, that way if he doesn't want to, he can pretend he never heard it. But shockingly enough he does what I ask. "Are feeling ok?" I nod. He worries over me.

"Why do you care so much Ryuu?" He shrugs. "You're the first stable thing in my life. You and this job. I don't want to lose you too soon." I have to smile at him. A real smile, not a smirk for once. He blushes. Here is my chance. I lean in close, tilting my head at the same time. He copies the motion. His lips taste sweet. Like rum. He is more like me than I thought. After a good minute or two of kissing, I begin to lap at his lips. He opens instantly, granting me access to the sweet cavern. Wow, yo. I'm thanking the Lifestream for sending me this little gem. I lace my fingers in his hair and pull him even closer. He is so submissive. He just lets me crash through the barriers his sexual orientation set up. I know this wouldn't be the case if I were anyone else. It kinda makes me feel special, yo. His hands are fisted in my shirt, and he is whining in almost a pleading manner. I pull back slightly. His eyes are glazed, his lips wet. A pink blush has dusted his pale white skin. And his hair is slightly disheveled. I moan softly at the sight. Ryuu is very beautiful. I have a feeling he cares for me deeper than he probably should, and I'm not helping matters with this. I wish I could feel it back. I wish I could tell him I love him and kiss him into oblivion. But I can't. I know that. I need some strong and forceful ta control me. Ryuu is too gentle. I have so much blood on my hands, that I need someone with just as much on theirs. Someone who can kiss me even when I'm covered head to toe in it. Someone not afraid to kill and enjoy it. Ryuu can kill, but he doesn't find it… I don't know… erotic? Like I do. I know that makes me sick, but I like it and I can't help it. Zack didn't feel the same way, but he also didn't care I did. He treated me the same as everyone else. Maybe that's the reason I can't let go.

I force myself back to the present and kiss Ryuu again. Maybe I can't love him, but I can humor him. He doesn't deserve this unrequited love, but how can I change? I suppose I will have to make it my new life mission to find Ryuu a girl or guy worthy of him. Until then I can pretend for him. He is worth the time. Maybe this is what Zack feels for Cloud. An overwhelming desire to protect. Ryuu is like a little brother to me, but nothing more. I can love him like family, but I can never be in love with him. For some reason that makes my heart clench. Sometimes I wish I had just let him steal the bike and get away. If I never knew how perfect he is. Ignorance is truly bliss.

x-x-x

It seems like my home away from home, Junon, will no longer be my main place of residence. Becoming the president of ShinRa will change quite a bit in my life. Ah but it is very much worth it. Dear father, why couldn't you die sooner? I could have taken this company so far in the time it took you to finally die. All those years of being beaten half to death with a cane, burned with cigars, sliced with letter openers… Those years are gone now, and so begins my rein over ShinRa and Gaia. How do I measure up now? Am I still worthless? Hmph. I think not. First order of business, the parade. How sweet of the unknowing people for them to throw me a parade to welcome me to office. Little do they know it will be their only chance to save themselves from me and my new power. I won't interfere if one gets the bright idea to kill me. But nobody likes an anarchist. I have a feeling I will be fine. It will be beautiful. The world will crumble in my hands for cursing me with such a father. I've been beaten, raped, stabbed, burned, tortured, and submitted to scientific experimentation. Can it get much worse? Why would he do that? Oh he believed I was too feminine and he took a guess that I wasn't exactly straight with my sexual orientation. I have never admitted as such, he just assumed. He was correct, but it still wasn't something you guess about and then proceed to punish the victim on that guess.

I suppose that's why I love to torture, maim, and kill. I enjoy inflicting the same tortures, which were inflicted on me, on other people. Most don't deserve it, but I still can't help myself. I can control myself most times, but sometimes I need a little… indulgence. Oh how sweet screams sound pouring out of hoarse throats and the delicious taste of innocent blood. Being a Turk helped to introduce me to these pleasures. I was an excellent interrogator. I never got squeamish at the slight of blood or death. It was thrilling. Perhaps that's why I find Reno so fascinating. I am familiar with his story. Born to a slums whore, who later died of AIDS leaving Reno lucky he was born with street mako in his blood, it protected him from the disease. The woman obviously had the disease long before she started using mako, or Reno would be affected too. A gang leader at 13, an assassin at 15, and an expert hacker at 16. Those were the skills that got him noticed by the Turks. In ShinRa, he was put through some extra tests by Hojo. His blood showed a natural energy, created within him. It was like fire in his veins, literally. And his interaction with the summon Ifrit was amazing. The summon became a part of him. Reno doesn't need a Fire Materia, he has one inside him. It was this discovery that reopened the Zirconiade Case. This in turn lead to problems with the original AVALANCHE.

It was assumed that since both had a summons material inside them that Reno and Elfé would end up meeting the same end. And yet Elfé deteriorated and Reno is strengthening. Perhaps this has to do with the fact that Ifrit was absorbed naturally and Zirconiade was inplanted. No matter, Reno was a complete success… At the expense of some mental control. He has the tendency to attack and kill anything when threatened and injured. His sadistic side is enthralling. I've only had the pleasure of seeing it twice. Once when he was assigned to being my bodyguard in Rocket Town, and we were attacked by AVALANCHE Ravens. And then when I personally threatened his life with my shotgun for touching me. Yet he doesn't even remember that encounter, but I will never forget it. He pinned me to the wall, slamming my head down hard enough to cause a wound and proceeded to lick the blood off my forehead. From that moment I believe "fell for" Reno Sinclair. He was the only one outside of Tseng and my father to ever one: forcefully touch me, two: touch me period. And yet I wasn't angry. Well I was at first, but the second he started to lap up the blood I became entranced. And although I have "feelings" for Reno, I doubt I will ever have the chance to act upon them now that I am the president. An employer just doesn't have relations with his second-in-command male bodyguard. I wish I never found that I could maybe even.. love.. Reno. Ah blissful ignorance, how I desire thee.

x-x-x

She's gone. Emina, my dear Emina. She's dead at the hands of the people I tried so desperately to save. I can't help but frown with sorrow, staring at the ring in my hands. I roll it between my palms. She was perfect. Strong, smart, beautiful, caring. How could she be gone? And in her place is her little sister. Elena is sweet, but she is merely a girl. She will never fill the shoes Emina did. I knew Emina had feelings for Rufus, but I could get past that, and I hoped she would too. We had been together for seven months as of three days before her death. I was going to ask her to be mine. My wife. Now all I can do is imagine what she would have said. I knew she should have quit the Turks as soon as she found out. My wife and my child. I was going to be a husband and father. I should have asked her when I found out she was carrying. Maybe she would have listened when I asked her to stay off the field. My bed is empty permanently for the first time in seven months. I know that as the first-in-command Turk, it is my duty to not let emotions hinder my performance. I still need to protect Rufus. But Shiva, I'd be lying if I said it wasn't hard. I wish I could pretend this never happened and go on with life as normal. Gaia, is ignorance bliss.

x-x-x

It's so cold in here. This coffin. My eternal tomb. Damned to wither away here in this Gaia forsaken hole with no contact from the outside world. Why did I have to fall in love with her? Lovely Lucrecia. Gaia she was beautiful. But she was also married. She was Hojo's, even if she didn't want to be. How I loved that woman. I wonder, was the child mine? Or was it Hojo's spawn? She believed it was his, but sometimes I entertain the thought that I left her with a child. Even if the child grew up knowing only Hojo, perhaps the young thing came into the world with crimson eyes or pale ivory skin and jet black hair. How that thought gives me pleasure. It would be my last insult to Hojo. If I was a man of faith, I would pray that I was the one to give Lucrecia her child, but alas I am not. Stuck here in this dreary hole, there is no room for faith. And here I am damned to spend my entire life, undying and not aging. Like a vampire I am. A creature built to suck life one helpless being to feed myself and give myself entertainment. Yet even without nourishment, I do not die. I wish for it every day. As I also wish I could rewind time and have never joined ShinRa. Ignorance of pain is eternal bliss and pleasure.

x-x-x

Everything hurts. Everything. I suppose at a time like this I should be grateful to be a fucked up product of Hojo. Yet I'm not. How can I be? I have yet again been denied the chance to be with my beloved, Elfé. Damn Revive Materia implanted in my body. Gives me the ability to live forever and yet doesn't allow me to revive other people. How cheap is that? I'm all alone again. Wedge, Barret, Tifa, Cloud.. Jessie. My only hope of being happy again is dead. Do I have to make a new name now? First Sears Baron, then Biggs Sparrow. Now what? Complete Idiot? Sounds right. Elfé… How I wish I could see you. Even just for a minute. To tell you I love you. To kiss you one more time. Thanks to ShinRa you're dead, Jessie is dead, AVALANCHE is dead, again, and I'm stuck here with out a way to die and join you. Remember when things were easy? Back when we were kids growing up in the slums? Doing odd jobs for money, aspiring to do great things? Those were the days. I think I'm losing my mind Elfé. I can't live without you and I can't die at all. Maybe I should give up with the group ShinRa destruction efforts. I can start a one-man army type operation. Since I can't die, what do I have to lose? I want to die anyway, so I really have nothing to lose.

I slowly pull myself from the Sector 7 wreckage. Oh what's this? "AVALANCHE terrorists kill the President of ShinRa. Fugitives include: Cloud Strife, Zack Fair, Tifa Lockhart, Barret Wallace, Aeris Gainsborough, and Red XII, an escaped science mutant. If they are sighted, they are wanted dead or alive, preferably dead. Rufus ShinRa will be taking over the presidency and will be inaugurated in Junon." They survived? Thank Shiva. Maybe there is hope. Now just to get to Rufus. Junon, huh? Well then that's where I'm headed. If I can get there in time I can hook back up with AVALANCHE and we can maybe still win this David versus Goliath war. I have to do this for Elfé. For Jessie. For Wedge. For my family. For myself. I wonder if they will be shocked that I'm alive. I'm sure they will be. No one could really survive that plate falling, unless they had.. well… a Revive Materia implanted in them. Hmm, maybe I can scare them a bit to cheer myself up. It would be worth the pain Tifa would dish out to see their faces. It hurts to know that until Junon, I'm going to be alone, but I will have to deal. Even if I wish I could forget. The saying "Ignorance is Bliss" is too cliché for me. But it applies.

x-x-x

I wish Zack would talk. He has been quiet ever since I told him what happened on the cliffs. We reached Kalm safely and grabbed a room at the inn. I hope he doesn't fall too deeply into his depression, cause I'm not even sure I am as stable as people think. I still have moments where I fade in and out. I wish I didn't get the flashbacks… Maybe Ignorance is the most valuable thing anyone could ever ask for.


	10. Fleeting Insanity

**Cracked Visage**

**Fleeting Insanity**

I believe it's time to split up. We have overstayed our welcome with AVALANCHE. I signed up for one or two jobs, not a permanent position. Honestly, I couldn't care less what happens to the planet. Me and Zack just need to get the hell out of here. I'm thinking Costa del Sol for awhile. Zack likes the sun, and Costa has plenty of it. "Hey Zack." He turns to me. He has been too quiet lately. Time for an attitude booster. "Yeah Chocobo-head?" I smirk slightly. "How bout Costa del Sol? I've never been and I wanna swim in the actual ocean." His eyes brighten ever so slightly. "Uhh, sure. Whatever you want to do, I'm game." Not good enough. "Come on Zack! Be enthusiastic about it! Think of the sun, sky, and sand. We can have our own vacation! We need it after all." Finally he smiles a real Zack smile. "You know what, you're right my little Chocobo-cutie! We can kick back and enjoy our premature retirement!" I laugh softly, he grins. I love Zack when he's happy. He can brighten a room... more like brighten a town... I stand up from my place on the bed next to Zack's, and make my way over to him. He lifts the covers and allows me to crawl into bed with him. I like it when Zack takes the time to cuddle with me. It gives our relationship some comfort. He lets me lie my head on his chest over his heart as he strokes my hair. I look up at him with a soft pout. Zack tells me constantly how he loves my pout, so I thought I'd indulge him. I feel the shiver travel through his body. He leans down and I meet him halfway, connecting our lips in a very tender kiss. I usually like these kisses the best, but at the moment I want something faster, so I fist my hand in his hair and pull him closer. He catches my drift and begins to lap at my lips for permission to enter. I grant it quickly.

Zack always tastes like sun and clean air. That's one of the reasons I chose Costa del Sol, it's a nice thought to imagine kissing him under the sun and in the waves. We've had too much country, really. Even us country-boys get a bit bored out there, not to mention trying to get back into the "country" routine after coming from SOLDIER and it's fast-paced nature. It would be too hard. Just as our kissing begins to really speed up, a soft knock at the door surprises us, causing me to bite down slightly on Zack's tongue. He howls in pain and I blush furiously as Tifa runs in at the sound. No wonder I prefer the tender ones. Tifa's face went from shocked, to embarrassed, to pissed, to a little too calm for comfort. "Oh sorry, I didn't know you were _busy_."I turn an even darker shade of red as Zack howls of pain turn into howls of laughter. I smack him on the head to shut him up, causing another howl of pain. I look at my hand confused. I was sure I didn't hit him too hard. Oh well. "We weren't. We were just... um... cuddling?" Oh Shiva, I should never open my mouth. Tifa rolls her eyes. "Barret thinks it's time to go. One night here is enough. We need to get to Junon in four days for Rufus ShinRa's parade." I shake my head. "No. Me and Zack are done. We are just leaving. I didn't sign up for this. Zack and I want some peace, so we are going on a personal vacation for awhile." Tifa looks at me with wide hurt eyes. "You aren't going to stick with AVALANCHE? What about Aeris? What about... me?" Oh damn that's right. Aeris. "Uh well Aeris can come with us I guess. But we are leaving." Zack backs me up. Tifa lowers her head and leaves the room. I see tear drops on the floor where she stood. If I was a bit nicer I would care, but at the moment Zack is all that matters.

I think whatever happened in ShinRa mansion really fucked me up. I was never this cruel or uncaring. I also never had these flashes of pain and desire to kill. What did you do to me Hojo? I looked at myself in the mirror the last time I had a flash and I saw my eyes, they are just like Sephiroth's. Oh Gaia, I hope Hojo didn't make me like him. Please Shiva no. I couldn't deal with that. All I can do is hope and pray I'm still Cloud underneath it all. Or at least, I hope Zack will still care about me if I am different. I think he will, after all he's different too. He has sobered and I have become more bold. I can sense a power in me now. Like a force I am meant to use for something great, good or bad. I also have a feeling that I can't really control it and that Aeris senses it too. Hojo did say she was an Ancient. They can tell things like that. I know I have to protect her. Everyone's life depends on it. Zack doesn't play a huge part in this, that much I can see. I have a feeling he is here for more moral support. That's weird since he is the one that wants to be a hero. I don't care anymore. It feels like all my emotions were sucked out of my body, leaving me numb to everyone but Zack and Aeris. Well that doesn't bother me, they make up my entire world anyway. Zack. Gaia, I love him. And Aeris. I think I love her too, but differently. My love for her is one of devotion. I know that it is my place to protect and look after her. I am in love with Zack. I could spend the rest of my life with him and be happy. I need to think this out some more.

x-x-x

Finally, some real ground. I hate Junon, but hell it's nice to touch down. I hate flyin' when it ain't me piloting. I gotta go see the damn doctor now. Aw fuck this ain't gonna be pretty. We're in the elevator now. Ryuu and I had a nice little make-out session in the chopper, so I feel a bit better. His taste is still on my lips. I let out a small, inaudible sigh. I need a break, yo. Thank Shiva we're headin' to Costa after the parade. I'm glad the president is dead. Heh, I suppose he ain't the pres anymore either. I'm hopin' Rufus will do a good job. Gets him off the Turks' backs too. I may be scared of 'im, but I don't want nothin' bad ta happen to him either. He has seen me at my worst and didn't fire me. I gained a bit of respect for him after he dealt with my psychotic side by himself. Though I still don't believe the story he gave me. There is no way I just let him be after goin' crazy on him. Sounds fishy, but I can't remember and he's alive, so I'm not gonna argue. Well here we are, time ta see the doc.

"Hello, Reno. Good to see you again." Fuckin' doctor with his fuckin' cheery fuckin' voice, callin' me by my fuckin' first name. "FUCK THAT HURTS, yo. Asshole!" He shakes his head. "It seems you broke some ribs and fractured your arm. You used a Cure Materia, correct?" I nod. "Well then we are going to have to re-break and set the bones." Oh. Hell. No. I pull my gun on him. "Just try ya fuckin' prick!," I bellow at the top of my lungs. "Must you be so loud Reno?" I whirl around fast pointing my gun at Rufus in instinct, this causes Rude to pull his gun on me out of instincts as well. Ryuu stands there dumbly, obviously this all happened too quick for him to respond. I drop my gun arm when I see it's just Rufus and Rude follows. "Sorry sir, ya snuck up on me." He raises his eyebrow. "A Turk being 'snuck up on'? Bad form Reno." I scratch my head and nod sheepishly. "What's wrong with him?" Oh great, Rufus is gonna see how big of a baby I am. "He has broken ribs and a fractured arm and won't let me re-break and set them." Rufus surprises me with his expression, it's grave. So he has the same fear as me. "Rude, Ryuu, Doctor, I wish to have a word with Reno alone. Please stand outside." I nod at Rude and they leave the room. "Yeah sir?" He looks at me with dark eyes. "Lie down Reno." Oh Shiva. This could be one of two things, neither is really good... Well option one could be nice... Mmm... "Uhh sir? I don't think that's a good idea..." His eyes tell me he is very serious. Gaia. "Reno. Now." Aw fuck. Might as well find out what he has in mind. "Uhh.. What are ya plannin' sir?" I reluctantly lie down like he asked. "I'm going to set your bones." OH SHIT HE CHOSE OPTION TWO! Damn my perverted mind and too high, for my own good, hopes. "Bad, BAD idea sir." He rolls his eyes as I try to squirm away. No, no, NO! I could kill him if I freak out. He straddles me and I thrash wildly. It's better if I kick the shit out of him than kill him. And in this position... aw fuck.

"Reno I believe I may be the only one strong enough to re-break those bones and survive without sedating you. And I know you don't like being sedated, so relax, I'm anticipating you losing control." I stop thrashing to look at him. "Sir, you are the president of ShinRa, AKA my boss. It is my duty to PROTECT ya, not kill you! I know ya survived one of my 'episodes' but this is crazy, yo! I ain't gonna let you... FUCK!" Rufus slammed down on my ribs with his hand. I heard the snap and I also felt the fiery power growing in my body. Rufus shifted to pin my wrists down as I started to lose control.

x-x-x

Damn I forgot how strong Reno was when he was crazy. I have to use all my power to pin him down. At least it's only me doing this, so if I have to soothe him, I can do so without explaining myself to the doctor or other Turks. His eyes are blue now. I can see Ifrit's fire burning in the core of his eyes, a red flame in the middle of the blue fire that is his eyes. "Reno it's only me, Rufus, calm down. I need to set the bone." He smirks up at me. "Oh? Gonna just leave me hangin' afterwards? What if I want a little more?" A shiver runs up my spine at his words. Damn him for being so erotic like this. I set the bones quickly, he hisses at the pain but I can hear the bones fusing instantly. Lucky him with his hyper-healing. I move to the arm, at least he's being agreeable. "Done." That was too easy. "Umph." All the air in my lungs is released as I am flipped onto my back with him now above me. "Good, cause that was quite arousin'." I give up easily to his mouth, I don't want to fight anyway. I feel him trail kisses down my neck, stopping at my collar. He pulls it down slightly and begins to suck and bite hard, drawing blood. I throw my head back, exposing my neck in submission. It feels too good to stop. Then there is this beyond annoying sound of a door creaking open. "Sir? Oh. S-Sorry." Ryuu runs from the room in what looks to be tears. Reno's body freezes. Oh Gaia. I put on my best "I'm-going-to-kill-you-for-touching-me face". I don't want Reno knowing I want him like that too soon. "Huh?" He shakes his head, his eyes shifting back. "Awake?" He nods. "Good. Get off of me and hand me my shot gun by the door. I never said you could touch me." His eyes focus completely and he looks down horrified. "I... What did I do?" I roll my eyes. "I set your bones, and you then proceeded to flip us, straddle me, and began kissing and biting my neck to the point of drawing blood. Tell me Turk, why shouldn't I kill you?" He looks terrified and embarrassed. "I don't know sir. Maybe you should."


	11. Irrational Fear

**I don't own song!!**

******Hero by Chad Kroeger feat. Josey Scott.**

**

* * *

**

Cracked Visage

**Irrational Fear**

He jumps off me and grabs the shot gun, handing it to me. I smirk and set it down again. "I'm going to let it slide, knowing that it wasn't really you, but next time put it somewhere my collar can cover." I get up to leave. "Uhh sir..." I cut him off quickly. "Go find your little boyfriend, it looks like he was crying. Perhaps you should inform him that you aren't the type to stick with one person. Or rather assure him that it wasn't you. Either way, what happened never leaves this room." I smirk slightly as I grab the knob of the door. "Sir, wait." I turn back to him. "Yes Reno?" He rubs the back of his head looking away. "Uhh has that ever happened before? And what did ya mean 'next time'?" I laugh softly. He looks up startled. "Yes it has, the last time I saw your other half, I didn't tell you about it so you wouldn't be embarrassed. And as for the 'next time' I have realized it is a trend with you when you lose control. You seem to like the taste of blood. I don't know if it's everyone or just me that gets the kissing part, but as long as it means I can live through the encounters I'm happy. Honestly Reno, a bit of bloodlust is _refreshing_. A good Turk would have a little of it, a better Turk would be made of it. You are an excellent Turk Reno. I have had the pleasure of seeing you fight. Besides, I never said I didn't enjoy the attention." With that I left wordlessly. I saw Rude and the Doctor looking at me questionably, I really didn't care. "I set the bones and his hyper healing took care of the rest. Look after my Turks." I turned on my heel and walked down the hall. I had to wait for the elevator, and I saw the young Turk sitting on a bench. "He wasn't sane, you know." He looked at me confused, his eyes were red, I had a feeling Reno was important to him. "He loses control when in pain. Ask him about it. But I can assure you, me and Reno have no history and for the moment no future." I get in my elevator when it arrives, leaving the Turk to wait for an apologetic Reno.

x-x-x

I have to admit I feel a little bad for Tifa. Cloud really could have been a bit nicer to her, but I don't think he was really in the mood for her right now. "Ready chocobo-chick?" I love using chocobo nicknames since he hates them and that gets me a nice glimpse of his famous pout. It has never let me down and it didn't start today. I approach him to kiss away the cute pout he has put on. I don't know what's better: seeing the pout or getting rid of it. "Yeah, I guess I'm ready. We need to head for Junon to catch the boat, but I want to split up from AVALANCHE." I nod, I have to agree with him, the AVALANCHE crew can be a bit much at times. I can't believe Cloud actually picked Costa del Sol though. I mean I'm not complaining but it's not really like him. We leave the room and stop at the girl's room. Cloud knocks softly. Aeris opens the door and quickly steps out. "Cloud what did you say to Tifa? She has been crying for the last hour!" Ah Aeris and her mothering instincts. "I told her me and Zack are leaving for Costa del Sol without AVALANCHE, we need a vacation. We wanted to know if you wanted to come too Aeris?" She shakes her head. "No. I'm going to stay here with AVALANCHE for awhile. I think they need a mother figure here. I will maybe hook back up with you if we meet again, but for now I'm going to stay. Besides you and Zack need some time alone and freedom." I can tell this worries Cloud. "I don't know Aeris. What happens if you get hurt?" She smiles one of her blinding smiles. "I know you will save me Cloud. I just know. Now take care of Zack and make sure he doesn't get himself killed! And have fun too! Good-bye, I'll tell Barret about you leaving so you won't have to hear it." Cloud nods at her and I follow. Aeris presses a kiss to both of our foreheads and walks back into her room. "Let's go." Cloud turns to me with some tears swimming in his eyes. "Do you think she will be ok?" I have to smile at this small bit of innocence Cloud has retained, it makes me feel good to know he is still him. "She'll be fine. Aeris is a tough girl. Besides, I have a feeling this won't be the last we see of AVALANCHE." I give him a comforting hug to reassure him.

We take the motorcycle, it's not like any of them would know how to ride it anyway. Junon is a couple hours away and we have to go through Mithril Mines to get there. I'm not looking forward to a meeting with the Midgar Zolom. That means we are going to have to get chocobos! Oooh I can't wait to see Cloud's face. Truth is he hates them. They seem to scare him for some reason, and they love him. Thinking about chocobos makes my mind wander to Cloud and how he has changed. He seems stronger. How did he go from no sword training to knowing how to wield the Buster Sword? Or even lift it? Grunts only receive gun training, swords come in at SOLDIER second class. Maybe watching me so much helped to teach him, or maybe whatever Hojo pumped into him has something to do with it. J cells, strain S. That's what it was called. Jenova cells, strain Sephiroth. Those are in Cloud and I. Hojo once said Cloud was a failure, and I was a success, but I think he was mistaken. It seems Cloud is the real success. He is very strong and smart, and I just feel like I am his side kick or something. Like the roles were switched after I got captured. Cloud's eyes have a strong mako presence now. Could Hojo have been trying to recreate Sephiroth in Cloud and I? I can hear Sephiroth in Cloud now and that scares me. Am I like that? What does it mean? Is he meant to be the hero now? Why is he so protective of Aeris? Why does she think he will be the one to save her? I can see a darkness growing in my sweet little Cloud, he is changing even now, and I can't stop it. I want to be his hero, but I know deep inside something is coming and it isn't me who will save Gaia, or Aeris, or Cloud. He will be the one to stand when everyone else has fallen. Sephiroth's sword. Why was it in Midgar? Is he the threat? Cloud has killed him once where I had failed, will he do it again? Can he do it again? I pray to Minerva that he can. Odin forbid he can't and we all die.

x-x-x

I have a song stuck in my head. That hardly ever happens to me, but what is really weird is that I can't ever say I've ever heard it before. How can I have a song stuck in my head if I never heard it? It's been stuck there for days. Ever since I work up from my comatose state in the alleyway.

x-x-x

_I am so high, I can hear heaven  
I am so high, I can hear heaven  
Whoa, but heaven  
No, heaven don't hear me_

x-x-x

Is this meant to be a sign for me? A calling?

x-x-x

_And they say that  
a hero could save us  
I'm not gonna stand here and wait  
I'll hold onto the wings of the eagles __watch as they all fly away  
_

x-x-x

Am I that hero? That's not who I am. It should be Zack, but somehow I know it's not.

x-x-x

_Someone told me  
Love would all save us  
But, how can that be  
Look what love gave us_

A world full of killing  
blood spilling  
That world never came

x-x-x

Love. The song is right love can't save anyone. We all wish it could, but it can't. Love causes problems on it's own... But then what about Aeris? She loves everyone and is selfless, is that how everyone is supposed to be? I think so, but light can't exist without shadow, for every Aeris there is a Sephiroth.

x-x-x

_And they say that  
a hero could save us  
I'm not gonna stand here and wait  
I'll hold onto the wings of the eagles  
Watch as they all fly away  
_

x-x-x

Can I even be the hero? I don't even trust my own mind anymore, how can I save everyone if I'm not sure I can even save myself?

x-x-x

_Now that the world isn't ending  
It's love that I'm sending to you  
Isn't the love of a hero  
And that's why I fear it won't do_

x-x-x

I don't want this job. I don't want to be the "hero". I want to be Cloud and be alone with Zack. Let AVALANCHE play the hero.

x-x-x

_And they say that  
a hero could save us  
I'm not gonna stand here and wait  
__I'll hold onto the wings of an eagle's  
Watch as they all fly away_

x-x-x

They can't be the hero. I know it. It's my burden, and I will, in time, bear up to it, but the life of a hero is a lonely one. At least I have Zack and Aeris to guide me.

x-x-x

_And they're watching us (watching us)  
They're watching us (watching us)  
As we all fly away  
_

x-x-x

If I do this, maybe I can finally be at peace and I will have earned my rest. I know I have a duty, and my duty will not wait for me to make up my mind. I wish I just knew where to go and what to do.

x-x-x

_And they're watching us (watching us)  
They're watching us (watching us)  
As we all fly away (yeahhh)_

x-x-x

I guess if I knew what to do then I wouldn't be a hero would I? Heroes don't know that they are going to be heroes or when it will happen. I will just follow my path as the Lifestream intended.

x-x-x

_And they're watching us (watching us)  
They're watching us (watching us)  
As we all fly away  
Whoa ohh ohh _

x-x-x

I have a feeling my biggest feat will be overcoming myself. But I will cross that bridge when I come to it, until then I will just enjoy Zack's love and company. It seems we are getting close to mithril mines now, my musings have taken longer than I thought. "Hey Zack, aren't we getting close?" He jumps slightly, I guess he was musing too and wasn't expecting me to talk suddenly. "Uhh yeah we are, but we need to make a pit-stop and pick up some better transportation." Huh? Better transportation? Isn't the bike good enough? Oh Shiva. Are those? It can't be... He wouldn't do that to me… Gaia please no… Why? Why me? "CHOCOBOS!"


	12. Valiant Sacrifices

**Cracked Visage**

**Valiant Sacrifices**

It looks like even from the grave Emina can still show me up. Why does she always have to be the "perfect" one? Can't anyone see I am just as good? I have better shooting marks from the academy, I have higher strategy scores too. I am faster, stronger, smarter, and a better shot! And my marks from the academy proves it! How can people still see her as better than me?! Sure she had the pretty blue eyes and fair skin, but I have the long golden blonde hair and dark chocolate eyes! I never wanted to take her place, all I wanted was to be a Turk! Emina's little sister or not. I can't believe he said that to me! _"Elena stop trying so hard. You can't be her." _How dare Tseng? Yeah maybe he was in love with Emina, but I am my own person! I never said I was trying to be her, and as for trying too hard, I was trying to make a good impression on my new boss! Unlike _her_ I don't have to sleep my way into the company. I can be a great Turk on my own. Tseng will realize this soon enough. I am trekking through these dirty mithril mines to keep track on Sephiroth with Tseng. How could he dammit? I know I am letting this get to me too much, but it was fucking rude! He thinks just cause I am young I can't be cut throat too. Well he is in for a surprise. So far my favorite Turk by far has to be Reno. And he is fairly good in bed too. We slept together on my first night in the Turks as a "welcome" greeting. No emotions, just sex. That's how it should be for Turks. Obviously Tseng forgot that. I knew Emina was pregnant. She told me so, gloated more like it. She didn't reveal the father, but you'd have to be blind not to see. Well at least he has calmed my one fear. That he would only recruit me to take her place... Now I can show everyone how much better I am than her. She and father have always seen me as the lesser. I will prove to them I can be a good Turk. I am moving fast through these mines, Tseng is lagging behind. "Elena, slow down or you will miss evidence." Oh don't make me laugh. "Oh really Tseng?" I toss back the bag of evidence I collected already. It is full of hairs, leather scraps, etc... I haven't missed one thing. "Fine, carry on then."

He tosses me back my bag and bends down to grab another long silver hair. I collect everything I see so that I don't miss any speck of DNA. Oh look a blood sample. It looks like Sephiroth punched the stone and cut his hand. I photograph the rock and use a Q-tip to collect blood. I bag it and sterilize the scene with disinfectant. "What in Gaia are you doing?! We need that evidence." I smirk and continue to destroy the bacteria. Tseng grabs my hand and pulls it away from the blood. He looks angry. "Did you not hear me Turk? You are the rookie Elena! Do as I say dammit." My eyes flash. "Actually, _sir._ I already bagged plenty of samples while you were catching up and for the leftovers, it would be negligent to leave it for a monster to come lick away, perhaps causing a mutation in the creature, which will then die and be eaten by other monsters, contaminating them as well. It could cause a biohazard mess and I thought it would be best to remove the Jenova cell and mako tainted blood with disinfectant so we could avoid such a situation, _sir._" He narrows his eyes, he knows I'm right. "That doesn't change the situation, Turk, I gave you an order and it is your job to follow it. Understood?" I shake my head. "No, sir. You told me to stop trying so hard since I can't be _her._ So I thought it best to stop following your orders until you get out of the mopey depression my sister's death has put you in. After all if I listened to you right now, you could cause the entire mission to be ruined. I have had sufficient training. I know when to make an insubordinate decision and right now is one of those times. Until you can realize that Emina is dead and you are still alive and the leader of the Turks, I feel that your orders can't be trusted. You seem to have skewed your lines of work and personal life, forgive me for not wanting to be in the hands of an emotional lunatic. After all, only someone still attached to a _dead_ Turk would accuse an alive Turk of 'trying too hard to be like the _dead_ Turk'. I know you cared about Emina, but to tell you the truth she wasn't all that special, there are plenty of slut secretaries I could introduce you to so you can ease the pain in your heart. Oh forgive me, _sir._ That was a bit too blunt."

I catch his hand as he moves to slap me. I narrow my eyes to deadly slits. "Perhaps I can continue with my mission now?" His face is red and he is breathing heavy, I know it was harsh but it was all true. "You are an insolent brat! You can never be her!" I laugh cruelly. "I never said I wanted to be, sir. All I want is to finish here and get back to Junon for the President's parade." I turn my back and begin to disinfect again. I hear him unholster his gun. Oh lovely, he is going to shoot me. See if he can. I step slightly to the right and avoid the bullet easily. I step again to the right as the next one comes, never turning to face him. Now I step left as he anticipates my stepping right. He unholsters his second gun and I duck slightly. The bullets hit exactly where my head was. I have yet to be fazed by this. Why should I care? I know if he hits me I'm dead, and if I try to run I'm dead. All I can do is try and avoid them without getting riled. Basic Turk training. What was that? I whirl around pulling my own gun and shoot in his direction. I hear him shoot at the same time. The bullet pierces my right shoulder. I don't cry out and shoot again. He fires again and this time it hits me in the stomach. I drop my gun and fall to the ground. Basic turk training... never let a comrade down. I see the monster fall behind him, I fatally shot it, and I smirk. Betcha wouldn't do that, would ya Emina?

x-x-x

I turn slowly and look at the monster at my feet. She... protected me? And I shot her... I drop to my knees. My blood runs cold. I lift my hands to my face to look at them. "What have I done?," I whisper. I crawl forward and pull her into my arms. "Elena.. Please Elena say something!" She has a smile on her face and her breathing is shallow. "I bet you weren't expecting that huh?" Her voice is so faint. I see drops of water landing on her cheeks. I lift a hand to my face and feel the tears leaking from my eyes. "Don't die. Just hold on!" I fumble around for my Cure Materia. I can't seem to find it. "Check my bag, bottom left pocket." I grab her bag and do what she said. I find the materia there and I pull it out. "Cure 3!" I see the wounds sealing. I don't deserve to be the Turk leader. I nearly just killed one of my own, because I was in a blind rage when she was right in the end. I hunch over and sob out all my pain. Losing Emina was hard on me, but it hurt much more to imagine losing Elena right now. I feel her hand in my hair, petting it down since the humidity in the mines has it sticking up at odd angles. "Shh, shh. It's ok. I know you loved her." How can she be soothing me when I just nearly killed her? Can she be so selfless? "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." She is like Emina and yet she isn't. She is bold, strong, smart, caring, protective, a good Turk, better than I have ever seen in fact, and beautiful. Emina wouldn't have done it, I know that. She loved me, but not as much as she loved Rufus. Maybe it really was a case of unrequited love. Could that be it? Could the woman of my dreams have been just that, a dream? I didn't think so, but now it seems that's just what she was. "I'm so sorry Elena. I was wrong. So wrong. Can you ever forgive me?" She laughs a real laugh. It's so musical. So sweet... "Tseng there is nothing to be sorry for. I was out of line. Can you accept my apology?" Gaia she really is everything Emina wasn't. Emina never would have apologized like that. "There is nothing for you to apologize for Elena. You did what was right for the mission. I was blinded by my own pain. Tell me something though and don't spare my feelings. Did she love me?"

Elena's eyes welled up with tears slightly and she blinked them back. "She.. She did Tseng. But I think there was someone she wanted more." I knew it. "Rufus?" She nods. "Yeah. But she did care about you. She was happy to be having your baby." I shake my head. I think I always knew deep down. Those nights when she would say his name instead of mine. The mornings she would wake up after a good dream and see me and be in a bad mood. I think I always knew she was dreaming about waking up to Rufus. I think I believed that I could eventually get her to a place where she was at least content to be with me. I close my eyes and frown. "Tseng..." I hold up a hand to stop her. "It's alright Elena. I think I always knew. Please forgive me for hurting you. And you are a far better Turk than any of the others. I can see that. She would have never done that for me, thank you." She smiles a beautiful white smile. Oh Shiva. "It's fine Tseng. Basic Turk training." Maybe that ring still has a purpose aside from sitting in my pocket for all eternity.

x-x-x

Hell hath no fury like a Turk scorned. Ryuu just became the epitome of his name. A dragon complete with fire-breathing, yo. Save me Shiva.

x-x-x

"I hate you Zack." I have to laugh at him, it's too cute. "I know my love." Cloud did not take the chocobo news well. He cried. I laughed and cuddled his tears away. The scene played out a little like this.

- Flashback -

"Wark?"

"Oh Gaia, please just leave me alone."

"Wark."

"No wark. GET BACK!"

"WARK!" (chocobo battle cry)

"WARK! WARK! WARK!"

"WEEP!" (baby chocobo)

"SHIVA!"

- End Flashback -

They seemed to think Cloud was a mate or something. The chicks leaped into his hair and settled into a nest-like cuddle. The adults proceeded to wark at him and perform mating dances. Poor Cloud was attacked by the sweetest creatures on Gaia. I think he liked the chicks though. Maybe it was his mothering instincts taking over, but I believe he warked a little at them to soothe them as we slowly removed them from their new found nest. I wish we had a chocobo chick of our own. Too bad momma Cloud can't make them himself. It would be a little blue-eyed, black haired, chocobo chick. It would get my color, but his hairstyle. Damn I want a one. "Hey Cloudy? Do you wanna have a baby?" Oh Gaia he fell off his chocobo.


	13. Pitiful Explanations

**Cracked Visage**

**Pitiful Explanations**

I can tell I have my work cut out for me with AVALANCHE. Tifa is an emotional wreck, Barret has anger issues, and Red is homesick. I suppress a sigh. The planet is dying and I have to make sure Cloud is ready to save it. I really have no time to be taking care of these over grown children, but I know Cloud and Zack need a small vacation first. We have to save the planet from Sephiroth. I know all this because the planet and Lifestream tell me. Sephiroth the terror of Gaia. Jenova the false Ancient. It is Cloud who will defeat them. I know my role in this cosmic game. The sacrificial lamb for the planet. I know I have little chance of surviving, but to save everyone else it is worth it. Death doesn't scare me. Living scares me. Being alive is much more scary than dying. When you're alive the world keeps changing and things happen constantly which can rock a person's world. When you're dead you are surrounded by friends and family in the Lifestream and you can help keep the planet alive. I want to be brave for my mother. I want her to be proud of me when I see her in the Lifestream. I can't let Cloud know that I won't survive either, he needs my support and I don't need him worrying over me every second. His face is too cute to be drowned with tears.

x-x-x

"Alright Reno. Explain." Here we go. "Ryuu, there is a part of me that no one understands, even I don't really. It comes out when I experience severe pain. When I was younger, I was infused with a summon Materia for Ifrit the Fire God. When I freak out, my body strengthens and I become different, yo. Stronger, faster, smarter, more cruel, et cetera... And I can't control myself. Only Rufus has really ever seen that side'a me and survived without a scratch... Well a scratch inflicted ta cause pain..." Ryuu shook his head at me. "Yeah maybe cause ya were too busy suckin' on his throat! 'E seemed to enjoy it too!" I knew he was going to freak out. "Well I don't know, but I know that Rufus is also the only one strong enough to fight back. You might not know it and this can never leave this room, but Rufus was experimented on when he was a kid. His ol'man didn't really like 'im. The Pres beat him and shit, yo. Sometimes he would stumble inta the Turk lounge covered in blood. He was infused with J cells and mako. 'E was treated like an animal. It made him stronger and all, but it fucked him up mentally like me, ya'know? Makes us like hurtin' people. We like the taste'a blood and shit. That's why I don't think me an' you can ever really be together..." Ryuu sobbed. I wanted to reach out and hug him. "But then why did you lead me on Reno? Aw fuck now I sound like a whiny bitch. Dammit look at what ya do ta me Reno!" My eyes fill with tears seeing his face with tears of pain rolling down his cheeks. "I didn' want ta lead ya on Ryuu. I really like ya. But I know you ain't like me. I don't wanna fuck you up! I hate being like this, Ryuu! I don't want to freak out one day and kill you on accident. That should tell you how much I care, that I'm willin' ta give ya up to protect ya." He is still crying. I wrap my arms around him and push his face into my chest to let him cry. "But what if I don't care? What if I want you anyway?" I shake my head softly while looking down at him. "I wouldn' let ya. I never said we couldn't be close Ryuu. But I can't be with ya, if ya catch my drift." I press a kiss to his forehead.

"You mean we can be together, but not officially?" I smile softly at my little Turk. "Somethin' like that. I can never promise ya love, Ryuu. I just can't feel it. For no one. But I can promise ya that I care bout ya more than anyone. The only reason I won' be with ya is so you don't get hurt in the long run. 'Sides, even though I care for ya, I ain't the most faithful. It ain't cause I wanna cheat and shit, but when I get drunk I get a strong sex cravin' and I can't tell who's who, yo." Ryuu nods into my chest. Man this kid is cute. I gotta protect him. I know it. "Ok. But just don't leave me yet. I don't care if ya can't love me. I just want your affection and I can pretend I have the rest. But I got ta know... Do ya like Rufus?" Aw shit. Well I guess I shouldn't start lyin' now. "Sort'a. He is the only one submissive enough ta ever make my other side complacent. And 'e is forceful enough ta deal with the sane part'a me too. I think kinda fill in the gaps for 'im too. Submissive ta his dominant and dominant ta his submissive. Ya get me, yo?" Ryuu nods at me. "If he can make ya happy, then I can deal with it. But until then stay with me?" I smile and pull him up to catch his lips with mine. "Wouldn' have it any other way, sweetie. Now back ta Turk mode, yo." Gaia I love his smile. It is so damn bright. "Ok. But I was thinkin', you mentioned tattoos? Can we go get some later tonight?" I have to smile at this little-me. "Sure, love." He blushes and cocked his head at me. "Love? I thought..." I cut him off. "I know. But I thought ya'd like the nickname." Shiva he needs ta stop smilin' like that, or I'ma gonna jump his bones. Holy.. The boy can kiss when he's happy. His friggin tongue is shoved all the way down ma throat, but I ain't complainin'.

x-x-x

What a touching scene. I wonder if Reno would have said so much if he knew I was watching. So he likes me hmm? I believe I can work with that. He was correct in his assumption that being experimented on "fucked me up". But I actually think that it may work in my favor with Reno. He needs someone as crazy as him to balance him out. Drunken sex cravings? I will have to look up his alcoholic preference.

x-x-x

Mithril Mines are the darkest and dirtiest caves on Gaia. And not to mention this humidity has my hair sticking out at even odder angles than usual. And these chocobo spikes are dangerous when introduced to people's eyes. Shiva, what the hell was Zack trying to do with that "you wanna have babies?" comment? Give me a heart attack? I assume he meant for me to be the "mother" too. No. Way. In. HELL. "Aw come on Cloudy, lighten up! It was just a joke!" Joke my ass. "Liar." Great here comes the pout. "I don't lie, Cloudy. And why wouldn't you want babies with me? They would be precious! Black haired chocobo chicks! They would get your innocent blue eyes and chocobo hair! Then they could get my black hair and personality! They would be PERFECT!" I scoff. "Not if hell froze over, Zack. I will not be pregnant. Besides you aren't taking nature into a count. Did you forget I am MALE?" The pout deepens. "No, but you never know. The mako could have made it possible! You know, to carry on the SOLDIER species!" I arch an eyebrow high. "SOLDIER species? One: SOLDIERs are human, Zack. And two: I wasn't a SOLDIER." He rolls his eyes. "Close enough Cloudy. Besides, you would make a good momma chocobo! Didn't you see yourself warking soothingly to the chocobo chicks?!" Oh perfect. Odin forbid he miss something like that. "It was so they would get out of my hair easier." That was a total lie. I was warking at them so they wouldn't be scared. Dammit, I'm such a girl. "Whatever. We haven't even gotten to a bed yet. We will continue this conversation in Costa." And with a wink, he turned to keep walking. He would say something like that. I guess that's part of his charm.

"Are sure you are ok Elena?" What was that? I hold up a hand to Zack and he nods. I take the Buster Sword off my back and ready myself. Zack takes up a defensive position. Two Turks emerge from a pathway. One male and... wait isn't that the Turk girl we killed at the ShinRa building? "How did you live?," I shout disbelieving up at the woman. She looks at me confused then recognition spread over her face. It was then I realized it wasn't her. "Oh you mean Emina? That was my sister. You killed her alright. I'm the new recruit. Elena." Ah so that's it. Zack looks tense. "Tseng! How could you do that to me and Cloud? You let us be taken by Hojo! How could you? I thought you were my friend!" Tseng? That sounds familiar. Here comes the flashes. I grab my head as pictures and voices flood my brain. "Cloud!," Zack calls out in worry. I see me and Zack on a mountain. I have my ShinRa grunt helmet on, he is not wearing the Buster Sword.

- Flashback -

_"At least someone is keeping up." _

_"Well I'm a country-boy too." _

_"From where?" _

_"Nibelheim." He laughs. _

_"What about you?" _

_"Me? Gongaga." I laugh. _

_"Like you know Gongaga!" _

_"No but it's such a backwater name." _

_"Ditto Nibelheim." _

_"Like you've ever been there." _

_"No, but there's a reactor out there right?" _

_"Yeah." _

_"A reactor outside of Midgar usually means..." _

_In unison: "Nothing else out there." _

_We laugh together. "Hey Tseng! Good news! Me and..." _

_I remove my helmet. "Cloud." _

_"Me and Cloud are both backwater experts! Oh yeah!" _

_"Good. Carry on then!"_

- End Flashback -

So that's how we met... I raise back up and wave at Zack to let him know I'm ok. "Forgive me Zack, but it was orders. And Turks..." Zack scoffed and cut him off. "Always follow orders, yeah I know. I got the same story from Reno. Fuckin' Turks. Looks like Cloudy and I took out most of your staff." Tseng's eyes grow dark. "Yes you did. Including the woman pregnant with my child." Zack's smug look faltered, as did mine. What? "W-who?" Elena closed her eyes and then reopened them quickly. "My sister. Tseng was going to ask her to marry him." Zack's face fell like a stone. I felt mine do the same. It was me who killed the girl. Well rather it was Barret, but I helped. I can't believe I did that. "I'm so s-sorry." I stutter out looking at my hands. "It's fine. She was under orders. A Turk follows orders to the grave. She should have never been on duty in her condition. But it doesn't make it hurt any less." How can I forgive myself? A child? I am a monster. I begin to shake. Zack rushes over and pulls me into his arms. "If you will excuse us, we must continue. Our orders aren't to hunt you. Consider yourself lucky." There is a bitterness in his voice as they leave. I don't blame him. How could I? I feel dirty. I just want Zack to hold me. "Let's camp for tonight Cloud." I nod at him. I don't think I could make it out of these caves like this anyway. I'm too disgusted with myself to move at the moment.

x-x-x

Poor Tseng. I know that wasn't my idea of him awhile ago, but I had no idea Emina meant so much to him. I would have been more tender with my words. He really is sweet underneath the cold exterior. Damn, I'm falling in love with my boss and sister's ex-lover. How can I get him to feel things for me, without thinking about her though? I wonder if we can do this? We just emerged from the mines after several hours of trekking through them. "Are you going to be ok, Tseng?" He nods solemnly. Maybe Emina never realized what a catch he was, but I sure as hell do. And I won't rest until I have him.


	14. Feigned Loyalty

**Cracked Visage**

**Feigned Loyalty**

Why is it that all my loves have to be unattainable? Emina and even Aeris. Aeris is a beautiful girl, I would be ecstatic to have her, but I know I can't. And now I am beginning to feel things for Elena. How could I ever ask her to be with me after I insulted her, attacked her, and nearly killed her? Not to mention that I was in love with her sister and rival. My brow furrows in deep thought. "Hey Tseng?" I turn to face her. Gaia she is gorgeous. How did I never notice this before? "Mmm?" Oh very intelligent Tseng. She smiles as I mentally berate myself. "Would I be considered a slut if I asked you out on a date?" I open my mouth and then close it in shock. What?! "C-Certainly not." I stutter. "Well, I know you wanted Emina, but I thought maybe you should start playing the field again. After all a broken heart is something that can't be cured alone, y'know. But I was scared that you would think I was trying to sleep my way up the ranks, but I can assure you I'm not. But I also don't want to be used as a "replacement" for Emina. But besides that, I would very much like to go out on a date with you." I quickly say a few thanks to the Lifestream, Shiva, and even Leviathan. "You couldn't ever be a replacement for Emina." Oh damn, that didn't come out right. "I m-mean.. That you are very much different. You are.. um... sweeter, uhh.. stronger.. braver... a better Turk... I uhh..." I smack my forehead. Elena laughs softly. That beautiful musical sound. I make a mental note to make a fool of myself more often. "I understand Tseng. So when we get to Costa?" I nod enthusiastically. She smiles at me. I feel faint. Oh look here is the helicopter. Thank Shiva. I was afraid I was going to continue to make an ass of myself in front of this beautiful woman like a teenage boy.

x-x-x

We need to get out of these mines. Cloud has settled down over night, but we still need to get to Junon. The exit for the mines was pretty close to our campsite. Ah fresh air! we set out to Junon on foot. It's fairly close so I don't worry too much. We should arrive before sundown and it is just before sun-up now. I know what Tseng told Cloud upset him deeply. Cloud couldn't imagine killing a pregnant woman. I hold him close even as we walk. He hasn't said a word all night. That blonde girl, Tseng looked pretty worried about her. I think he might be in love. Heh.. It'd be good for him. Maybe getting laid will loosen up that stick up his ass so it can come out. "Zack." I look down at my small lover. "Yes Cloudy?" His eyes are full of tears. I lean down and kiss them out of his eyes. "Do you think I'm evil or crazy?" I frown at him. "Of course not, sweetheart. You couldn't have known. Tseng should have taken her off the field. Turks aren't allowed to get pregnant, you know." Cloud shakes his head at me. "No besides that. I feel like I'm not me anymore. Do you think I'm going crazy or turning evil?" My poor baby. "Never Cloud! You are perfect! Nothing will ever change that! You could be scarred from head to toe and enjoy killing people just for the thrill of seeing blood and I would still think you were perfect. You are my Cloud and I..." Oh Shiva here we go. Lifestream give me strength. "You what?" I spin him in my arms to face me and stop walking. I look straight in his eyes. "I love you Cloud."

x-x-x

Did he just say...? What I think he said? "Y-you love m-me? But I thought that you weren't... ready?" Could he really mean it? Gaia I hope so. "Yes Cloud I do. I am ready now. Finding out I died on those cliffs made me realize that I would have died without ever saying it. That scared me Cloud. I realize now that life is too short not to live it to the fullest. And it's true Cloud, I do love you." I throw myself into his arms. "Gaia, I love you too." With those simple words, Zack calmed all my fears. After our moment, we turn and continue towards Junon. It takes about 6 and a half hours to reach the Harbor. It's about 1500 hours now. So like 3:00pm. Damn even after being in ShinRa I still have to convert military time. Zack has it wired into his brain. "Well, well now!" Oh Shiva give us a break. "Reno." Zack doesn't even turn. I do though. The redheaded Turk is emerging from a tattoo parlor with another redhead Turk. "That's specimen Z and C!" I growl at the younger Turk. "Aw calm down Cloudy, no need to bite my boyfriend's head off." The young Turk looked at Reno and glowed. This kid looked exactly like Reno. "Boyfriend? More like brother!" They did look like brother. They even had the same tattoos on the face, even though I could tell the young one's were new. Zack finally turned. He tensed instantly. "You're the one who captured me!" I growled again at the younger now at the new information. Reno chuckled. "Calm down both of ya, yo. We're both off duty so we ain't gonna capture ya. Come'on Zack, let's go grab'a drink at the bar. Y'know, for old times sake!" Zack tensed once more then relaxed. "Fine. Cloud wanna go have a drink?" I look at him incredulously. "You trust him?" Zack smiled. "When Reno is off duty he does NO work. I promise. He had the chance to catch us back in Midgar before you woke up, but he was off duty. So he sat down and had a drink with me. I wouldn't put you in danger." I nod at him, but I make a mental note to keep an eye on Reno's little friend. He seemed to be the type to do something rash.

We walk to the nearest bar and grab a booth. "So Zack, what's up with ya? Where's the rest of AVALANCHE?" Zack shrugs. "We split from them. Me and Cloud are headed to Costa." I tense and look at him. "Don't worry little chocobo, I ain't gonna sell ya out. Only way that'll happen is if ya get caught as on the boat. Ya know Rufus is headin' to Costa too. Don't get caught or I'll have ta kill ya." Zack frowns. "Great. But I doubt you can fight both me and Cloudy off. After all we have drastically cut the Turk division back on our own, you know." Reno's face gets serious. "You're damn lucky Ryuu was with me. If you had killed him, I'da hunted ya down and tortured ya, yo. Hojo ain't got nothin' on me when I'm lookin' for revenge. But I gotta thank ya for killin' Shou. Knives rookie. He was the one who turned Cissnei in." Me and Zack exchange looks. "We didn't kill him. We found him dead outside of our cells." Reno sighed. "So it was him, huh? Was his sword really in the Pres' back? Seph. Funny how both my best friends end up being against ShinRa, yo." Zack looked guilty for a minute. "I told you Reno. I had no choice. It was my job or Cloud's life, and I'm not sorry I chose him." I smile at Zack. He is so perfect. "Yeah, yeah I know. And I sort'a get what ya mean. I'da done the same for Ryuu. But still, I miss ya man. Wish we were still on the same side, yo." Zack nodded. I understand how they must feel, if they were best friend then it must be hard to be separated by orders now. Reno's PHS went off and he held up a hand to silence everyone.

x-x-x

Aw shit, it's Rufus. "'Ello, sir?"

"Reno, I have some specific orders for you."

"Sure, shoot sir."

"Acquire Zackary and Cloud's help in tracking AVALANCHE's movements."

I gape at the phone like it was spitting acid. "Uhh, sir? Where will I find..."

"Don't give me that Reno. I keep an eye out over my Turks. This isn't the first time you've seen Zackary. Now I realize you are off duty, but I just gave you orders. Fulfill them or kill them. Tell them that all they are required to do is to keep an eye on them, nothing else, and if they can do that they will be pardoned with ShinRa."

"Uhh.. Ok sir. Will do."

"You'd better Reno. I know how much your job means to you."

Oh Gaia. "Understood sir."

"Goodbye Reno."

"Goodbye Rufus."

- click -

x-x-x

"Well that was lovely." Zack cocks an eyebrow at me. "I just got some bad orders, but ya'know I'm a Turk and have ta follow'em right?" Zack sighs. "You were ordered to kill us?" I shake my head. "Nah. It seems Rufus has eyes everywhere, we're bein' watched right now. Now ma orders are more like orders for ya. Ya gotta join up with AVALANCHE and track their movements. Nothin' more, just watch'em. If ya don't I gotta kill ya. And 'e said if ya do it, you'll be given a full pardon with ShinRa. Then ya'll be free. I'm just givin' ya some advice, do what Rufus says. The man is as much a maniac as I am." Zack and Cloud don't look happy at the news. "We don't have to kill them or betray them or anything right? Just watch their movements?" I nod at Cloud. I hope they make the right choice, it would suck ta kill them and Ryuu might get hurt. Zack faces Cloud with a stern face. "I think we should do it." Cloud nods slowly. Excellent. "We'll do it. But we won't hurt them." I smile. "Good ta do business with ya. Seal it with'a toast?" Zack rolled his eyes but lifted his mug of beer and cloud did the same. Ryuu followed me. Our glasses clinked and we tossed our heads back and took a long drink. Thank Shiva.

x-x-x

Staring at the screen in front of me, I smirk. It's good when things go according to plan. I knew Cloud and Zackary would have a purpose eventually. Sephiroth is expected to be on the boat which will carry me to Costa del Sol. AVALANCHE should be arriving soon. And I see the cross-looking young Sears Baron, or Biggs Sparrow, sitting behind the group on the screen. Oh he doesn't look happy. How petty. I suppose he will have to be bribed into silence as well. Or rather... let him try and warn them... The AVALANCHE group will think he is insane, after all they did nominate Cloud the leader and he is favored by the two women. That will be much more fitting. I have to admit Reno's depiction of me was quite accurate. I'm quite pleased he chose to follow my orders. It would be a pity to have to kill such a fine Turk. Time for a vodka.

x-x-x

Those pigs! How could they betray AVALANCHE like this? With SHINRA! This is disgusting. Wait till I tell Barret, he'll have a fit. This is the guy Jessie had a crush on? The one who nearly broke us apart and then got her killed? Sonovabitch! I knew someone from ShinRa would go back to them eventually. Damn feigned loyalty. I wanted to believe Cloud too, since he went on two jobs with us and even saved Jessie. Gaia this stings. I still have one little charge... I could set it and remove them from the situation right now... Sure some innocents would be killed, but then AVALANCHE will be clear to deal with ShinRa. It would be two Turks and two traitors in one blow. I smile slowly. I pull the charge out my pocket; it's tiny since Jessie was such an amazing engineer. I place it on the bottom on the table set for 12 minutes. I stand up and leave some money on the table for my drink. I pop up my collar to hide my face as I make my way out.


	15. Justified Anger

**Cracked Visage**

**Justified Anger**

What in the hell does this guy think he's doin', yo? Tryin' ta blow us all up? Sears Baron, eh? Too bad for ya that I knew ya were there, ya idiot. He attempts to leave the bar and I stop him by extending my E.M.R. in his path. Cloud swings the sword off his back and does the same. "Excuse me." He's usin' a false voice. "Nah, I think ya should go disable that lil'charge back there, Sears. Wouldn't want ya ta get blown ta high hell with us, yo." He stiffens. "I can't die." I laugh a good long laugh. "That don't mean ya can't feel! Seriously I expected ya ta be trapped under that plate forever, yo. Now go do what I asked, I just got put back on duty, so you ain't safe no more." Cloud is staring at the man strangely like he is trying to see he face. "His name is Sears Baron, or ya knew 'im as Biggs Sparrow. Supposed ta have died when I dropped Sector 7, but the Revive Materia implanted in his body, keeps him from dyin'." Cloud's eyes nearly bugged out of his head. "Biggs?! You're alive? But I check all around the fallen plate and called everyone's names! You didn't call back." Sears huffed. "I don't need to explain myself to traitors." Cloud looked hurt for a minute before realization dawned on him. "You heard." Sears nodded roughly, pulling down his collar. "Damn. Look Biggs..." He holds up a hand. "Save it. I don't want to hear your lies. You want to make it out of here, disable the charge on your own. You have about... oh 3 minutes left." Shit. I jump out of my seat and move back to the charge. He was a little off, we still have 4 minutes 38 seconds. I hastily disable the charge, it was fairly easy to do. Sears doesn't look happy. "I'm the Pyrotechnical Specialist of the Turks, yo. I deal with the bombs." Zack smirked. "He used to play tricks on people with them. He gave me a live bomb for my birthday once and told me to disable it on my own. I cut the wrong wire and it exploded chocolate everywhere... and... well yeah that's as far as I'm telling the story." I laugh at the memory. Zack does taste damn good when covered in chocolate...

"So Sears, if Rufus is watchin' me then he knows you're here too. So either you're gonna die or be used for something. Rufus don't like unnecessary problems, yo. So ya gotta keep that pretty mouth'a yours shut or I'ma gonna have ta kill ya." His eyes narrowed. "What? Afraid Barret knowing about your little schemes would fuck up the plan?" I shake my head at him. "Nah, if Rufus didn't tell me ta do somethin' with ya already, that means he ain't worried." He doesn't look like he believes me. "Maybe your little boss didn't recognize me..." - bbbbrrrriinng - He looks down at his pocket. "Who in the hell...?" He picks it up. I see his face turn white as a sheet. "H-How do you have m-my number?" I smile at the scene. "Rufus can do anythin', yo. He'sa ShinRa. They rule the world or did ya forget, yo?" He shoots me a glare. "AVALANCHE will figure out your plans! With or without me!" How adorable, yo. "All that's left of the second original AVALANCHE is Barret, Tifa, and you. And Cloudy has already swayed the girlies to their side. So it's you and Barret vs. two women and two handsome ex-SOLDIERs. You're doomed, yo." He looks confused. "Two women? Is Jessie alive!?" I shake my head at him and Cloud does the same. "Nah, the other girl is Aeris Gainsborough." Sears' face dropped like a stone. He flips the PHS closed with a huff. Just as he closes his PHS, mine rings. I pick it up quickly.

x-x-x

"Talk ta me, yo."

"Reno, it's Tseng. AVALANCHE just arrived in Junon."

"Awesome, yo!"

"Reno?"

"It's nothin' I'm just gettin' excited. Zack an' Cloud are on our side kinda with Rufus' orders."

"Really now?"

"Yeah. They gotta track their movements."

"That is a good plan. Make sure they don't betray us though."

"Will do. Cya sir."

"Goodbye Reno."

- click -

x-x-x

"What was that about?" I look at my chocobo-headed buddy with a wide smile. "Your friends just arrived, yo!" Zack sighed and tipped back the rest of his beer. Sears took the chance to slip out during my call. Lucky little rat. Ryuu has been awfully quiet... Oh Gaia, he's sleeping. Damn he's so cute when he sleeps. "You look like a lovestruck puppy, Reno." Aw shut up Zack, ya know he's cute. "I wish, yo." He frowns at me. "What do you mean?" I shrug and start petting Ryuu's hair. "I can't feel love, yo. Just can't. It's a real shame, since I'd have this little gem if I could. Fuckin' Hojo with his damn experiments. That's what made me fucked mentally, yo. Damn summon Materia in me an' shit. Fuckin' Ifrit. Ya know what I'm talkin' bout right Zack? Like when I freak and shit. Dammit, I could'a killed Rufus yesterday." He raises an eyebrow at me. "What do you mean? You freaked out around him?" I nod. "Ya know when Cloudy kicked the shit outta me?" Cloud blushed and grumbled something about me deserving it, but I ignored it. "Well he broke some of my ribs and fractured my arm. He broke my hand too, but I set and fixed that on my own. Well I went ta the doctor and he said he needed to rebreak and set the bones. Bad idea really. Rufus walked in around that time and told Ryuu, Rude, an' the doctor ta leave the room. Then he jumped me and straddled me. Of course it couldn' be what I was hopen' for. He slammed his hand down on my ribs and I lost it. Next thing I know I'm looking down at him and he's bleedin' from his neck. Then he tells me I like tried ta jump his bones and started ta kiss and suck on his neck. Ryuu had walked in and saw and well didn't take it great. Then Rufus freaked me out by basically sayin' he liked it. If ya ask me he's insane." Zack chuckled softly "Isn't he watching right now?" I nod at him. "Yeah, and I want him ta know I think he is nuts. Yer not supposed ta play with fire, yo." Zack smiled at me, damn what's on his mind. "I think you have feelings for your boss Reno." Oh. Hell. No. "I don't think so. Rufus is too crazy for even me. Only someone that nuts would make me freak out just for the fuckin' thrill or some shit." Why does Zack have that look on his face dammit? "I think he may be just what you need. And from what you're telling me, he has an interest too. Maybe crazy people just turn him on, that or the blood thing."

x-x-x

You don't know how right you are Zackary. Reno you should listen to him. There is a know at the door. "Come in Tseng." He enters quietly. Gaia, I remember when I had a thing for him. Damn child-like crushes. "Rufus, we have undeniable proof that Sephiroth is still alive now. We are going to have to double up your security." I scoff, still staring at the screen of my laptop and taking a dignified sip of my vodka. "I am no invalid, Tseng. I have a shotgun of my own, you know. I was trained as a turk as well." He walks up right behind me. "I know, but you're the president now. You need to take better care of yourself. That stunt with Lazard awhile back was risky." I laugh. "Lazard. Ah my dear deceased half-brother. If only he had known that I had my own agenda in mind." Tseng frowned, I knew the man well enough to know even without looking. "Having sex with him just to drug him was an idiotic move Rufus." I have to laugh again. Tseng makes it sound so dirty. "Yes, but it got the job done, did it not? The drug sped up his degredation. Besides, I wanted to see just how he measured up." My laugh turned bitter. My father once said I wasn't a man. Oh I believe Lazard could vouch for me when I say I certainly am. Tseng leaned over my shoulder to look at the screen with pursed lips. "Tracking people's movements again, Rufus? Or should I say spying?" I smirk. "Either. But I don't consider it spying if my subjects are A: my employees, or B: known terrorists and ex-SOLDIERs." Tseng shrugs. "So are you going to be inpregnating this new Turk, Elena, as well?" He stiffens and pulls back. "Not as of yet." I laugh and pour him a glass of Wutain sake. I know he prefers it to vodka. "Good man, Tseng. Give her some time. I am doubtless she will fall for you." I raise my glass and he follows the motion. Tseng would have to be classified as a father figure, a best friend, a confidant, and an advisor. "I am sure you are glad to finally free of him, correct?" I smile, something only Tseng gets to see. "Yes, I am. It's nice to know that I will never be beaten to unconsciousness ever again or need you to patch me up. I am ready to finally be free of that abusive lunatic that I had to call father." Tseng nods at me, he understands my anger at my father.

Tseng was technically my legal guardian, my father gave me up because I wasn't a good enough son. But since he couldn't have another, he was forced to settle with me or Lazard. And I know my father hated Lazard far more than he hated me. I suppose that makes me lucky. Or does it make him lucky? Lucky that he didn't have to grow up knowing only that maniac. My mother died when I was quite young, my father murdered her. I know that much, but everyone else was told it was an accident. I was made to swear my silence. I have never told a soul except Tseng. Growing up in fear, and now ruling by it. That is my destiny and I will never have the chance to change it. Maybe Reno can help me find some little happiness in this life, or he can at least keep me somewhat sane... As long as he is alive, I have something to look forward to. That is all I ask for in this world. Tseng and Reno are the only ones to ever pierce my cold shell, and now I can't let them go. Odin forbid anything ever harm them. But now I have all these puppets to play with. There are too many strings to pull. Cloud, Zackary, AVALANCHE, and the biggest puppet of all Sephiroth. This will be interesting...


	16. Royal Treatment

**Cracked Visage**

**Royal Treatment**

"We should go meet up with AVALANCHE now, Cloudy." I nod at Zack. I can't say I like this plan, but if it will get me and Zack pardoned with ShinRa, I'm all for it. Maybe we can even get a job with ShinRa again, not that I trust them, but we need the money and stable place to live. We finish our drinks with Reno quickly. "Good luck, yo. And I'm glad ya chose ta help us... I really don't wanna see ya die." Zack gave him a two fingered salute and I nodded in his direction. Ryuu woke up when Reno shook him a little. Me and Zack headed for the door before Reno called us back. "Want a ride, yo?"

x-x-x

Holy Ifrit that's a nice chopper. "It's my personal bird, yo. A gift for ten years of excellent service." I whistle low, while Cloud gaped at it. Reno and his helicopters. "I'll give ya a lift ta ShinRa HQ and hook ya up with a bike." Me and Cloud turn slowly towards the man I believe we just mentally nominated as the most amazing person on Gaia. "A real ShinRa bike? Like a new one?" My voice is eager. I am like a kid in a candy shop with motorcycles. Reno laughs at my enthusiasm. "Yeah man. Whatever ya want." I fight back the urge to run and hug him into oblivion. We all load up into the helicopter, Reno takes the pilot's seat and Ryuu took co-pilot. If there is anything Reno can do right it is piloting. No one in ShinRa can match up to him. He takes us to the heli-pad on top of the Junon ShinRa office. I see mechanics come rushing up to inspect the machine. Reno freaks out and yells into the megaphone. "No touchin' my bird, yo! I am the only mechanic allowed ta touch'er! Don't ya dare or I'll kill ya." The men back off and we all scramble out of the helicopter. "A little anal much, Reno?" He shrugs. "It's my bird and only I can look at her, fill'er up, or fix her." We enter the building and are greeted by Tseng. "Rufus would like to welcome you to the Junon ShinRa office. He wants a word with you before we let you go. A motorcycle is being fueled up down in the parking garage. I can assure you it will be to your liking Zack." I feel a bit suspicious, but I nod. Cloud has that face again, guilt is rolling off him in waves. "Hey I..." Tseng holds up a hand to him. "I understand. I think I may have found someone a bit more like me anyway." Reno smirks. "Gettin' some boss?" Tseng had to obviously suppress a smile. "Perhaps." He leads us to the elevator and scans his keycard. "Why do all the ShinRa buildings have exactly 70 levels? Like really, it's kind of annoying to have to be in an elevator for like an hour to go from the ground to level 70." It really was. Back in Midgar going from the ground to level 49, the SOLDIER level, took FOREVER. "The deceased President liked the number 70. He claimed it was his lucky number." That's it? Well damn. "That's kind of dumb." Tseng chuckled. "The late President was not particularly known for his intelligence."

The elevator dings and the doors open to a small office with a woman behind a desk. "Coming to see the President?" Tseng nodded and she pressed the button for the intercom. "Tseng and some others are here to see you, sir." A moment passed before Rufus buzzed back. "Send them in." She waved us on and the door opened. The room is huge and dimly lit. Odd, nothing like the office in Midgar. I know Rufus ran the Junon office, so I guess it was styled for him personally. "Nice to see you again Zackary, Cloud." My eyebrow twitches slightly. "Call me Zack. Only Sephiroth called me Zackary." Rufus smirked and I felt Reno stiffen. He thinks that I will be killed for not being respectful. I don't really care. "Zack, then. I am personally glad to know that you accepted my offer. All I require is for you to travel with them and carry these." He pulls out two new PHSs. I frown. "They have tracking devices right?" He nods. "Yes but they are also real PHSs. You can continue to use your own, but just carry these so that we have an idea of AVALANCHE's position at all times. At the moment AVALANCHE is not our target. We are focused on Sephiroth, but it will be nice to know when and where a terrorist attack will happen. We will make no moves to stop them aside from normal tactics, so you will not be discovered. You can continue to fight our men and SOLDIERs and may continue to hate my company. But I must ask you to please refrain from killing my Turks as they will be informed not to kill you. You have already met them all. Tseng, Reno, Rude, Ryuu, and our rookie Elena. If you can do this for us, I will pardon you and provide you with whatever you desire. Transportation, work, a home, a new start, et cetera." I am a bit skeptical of this, but if I know ShinRas they don't often lie.

"Cloud?" He turns to me and nods. "Ok, we'll do it. But we better not have anymore problems with Turks trying to capture us." Rufus nodded. "You won't get Aeris either." I am surprised by the stern tone Cloud is using. "Of course not. You three will be safe, but I cannot assure you that AVALANCHE will be safe." Cloud looks upset for a moment but pushes it back. "Fine." A smile spread over Rufus' face. The look was quite scary. "Drink?" I nod and move forward. He fills 3 extra glasses full of vodka and one full of scotch, he and Tseng already have glasses. Cloud and I take one and Ryuu and Reno do the same, Reno taking the scotch. "A toast to good business?" We raise our glasses. "How'd ya know I drink scotch sir?" Rufus smirked at Reno. "I looked it up." Reno raised an eyebrow in an obvious attempt to not react to such creepy news. "Where?" Honestly it was kind of weird and why did only Reno get a special drink? "The main database. Your drinking preference is included in your profile. Tseng prefers Wutain sake, which he is drinking, Zack likes screwdrivers, Cloud had no information, and Ryuu likes rum. Since I do not have rum or orange juice, I gave them vodka instead since I don't like the smell of scotch." Reno nodded slowly. "That's kinda creepy, yo." Rufus smiled his perfect, evil smile. "I'm quite aware, Reno. I believe you described me as 'insane' or 'someone who likes to make people freak out just for the thrill'." Reno blushed slightly and Ryuu looked confused since he was asleep at the time. "It's true, yo. Zack can vouch for how crazy I can be." I have to agree, Reno can be pretty crazy. "Yeah. He kind of killed a whole batch of enemies and grunts when he got hit up side the head. Uhh tried to kill me too. I had to run away actually. He isn't one to be messed with, but if you can deal with him without dying or going nuts yourself then kudos." Reno glared at me, but I laughed it off. "Well Reno, I can assure you that do not get the urge to be 'thrilled' often, so you have nothing to worry about... for now." Reno choked on his scotch and I reached out to pat him on the back. Ryuu muttered something unintelligible.

"Rufus...," Tseng admonished. Rufus waved a hand in the air in defeat. "President or not I still have a personal sense of humor. And honestly I find the reactions amusing. As much as I find peoples' behavior amusing when they assume they are not being watched." Tseng coughed something that sounded a bit like "spying". Rufus raised an eyebrow and swirled his drink in his glass. "I feel the terms used to describe me fit perfectly. Insane, crazy, a lunatic, sadistic, evil, et cetera, et cetera. The list goes on and on." I feel the air heat up around Reno. What the fuck?

x-x-x

I raise my eyes to meet Reno's. His eyes are flashing blue. A slow smile spreads over my face. "Tseng, Ryuu." Both look at me obediently. "Escort Zack and Cloud down to the garage to pick up their motorcycle. Pay them an initial 100,000 Gil each. Provide them with new SOLDIER uniforms identical to what they are wearing now, so it doesn't raise suspicion, give Zack a sword, and then send them on their way. I must have a word with Reno." The young one, Ryuu, looks apprehensive but then Reno nods to him and calms his fears. The four file out of my office over the next few moments. "Ya wanted ta talk ta me sir?" Good his eyes are still flashing. "Yes I did Reno. What do you think of what Zackary said to you earlier?" He smirks at me. "I think it covers the situation pretty well sir." I raise my eyebrow. "How so?" It's good that he has already caught my drift. "Well sir... I'm kinda attracted ta the psychos." He walks forward and places his hands on my desk and leans in closer. I look up at him, still sipping my vodka. "Really now?" He takes my glass from my hands and licks the rim. His eyes are completely blue now. "Yeah. Since I'ma psycho myself and all. Interested?" I nod at him and keep my eyes on his mouth, where my glass is being molested by his tongue. He sets the glass down and grabs me by the collar. "Lovely." Reno crushes his mouth to mine and I don't resist. I pull him over the desk and on top of me in the chair. A loud moan escapes my throat as he forces his tongue into my mouth. I hear fabric ripping and I'm sure he is tearing my coat open. Luckily for me Reno never dresses appropriately so it's fairly easy to wrench his shirt open. He moves to where his previous attempt at making a love bite was, before we were rudely interrupted. I gasp and clutch at his torn shirt as he sinks his teeth into the flesh lightly. "Ya like that?" I nod quickly. I feel him lap at the freshly bleeding wound, trying to savor the blood. "I want to taste." He smirks against my neck and moves again to my mouth. The metallic tang of blood is all throughout his mouth. I tilt my head to the side and let him continue licking the blood away. "That's going to probably leave a scar if I don't use a Cure Materia, and definitely a bruise." Reno shrugged. "I'd say keep the scar, it'd be damn sexy." I made a mental note to keep the scar.

x-x-x

"Ready to go, Cloudy?" I nod at Zack. Rufus sure did give us the royal treatment. This bike is amazing. Not to mention the uniforms, the money, and the sword for Zack. Makes me suspicious. He was pretty eager to get us out of that room to be alone with Reno too. I have a feeling they won't be out of there for awhile. Why the fuck does Rufus ShinRa have to be one of the sexiest men on Gaia? Damn that handsome face of his. I'd fuck him if I wasn't wholly in love with Zack. My crush on him reminds me of the one I used to have on Sephiroth, admiration of a high-power icon. They both happened to be sexy as hell too. Nothing will ever come of it, nothing ever does. Me and Zack head to the slums of Junon. It's so dirty down here. We agree to try the coast first. Damn only one little girl. We approach her. "Hey little girl, have you seen a group of two girls, a large black man, and a weird dog/cat thing?" Smooth Zack. "No mister. I've been just playing with Mr. Dolphin." We nod and begin walking back to the stairs. A scream makes us turn around, there is a huge monster pulling the little girl into the water. Fear courses through my body and I start running towards the monster, swinging the Buster Sword off my back. Zack follows close behind me. I slash at the large creature. Some onlookers start filing down onto the coast. Here comes AVALANCHE with them, too easy. The monster doesn't give me and Zack too much trouble, but when it's dead we can see the girl. I dive under the water and look around, she is sinking. I grab her and pull her to the surface, rushing to the shore. Damn, she's not breathing. "Cloud! Zack!" I ignore the confused AVALANCHE bunch and lay the girl down. I have to mentally review CPR steps. I lean down and start CPR. Zack rubs me on the back while I attempt to revive the child. It takes awhile but she eventually starts breathing again. She coughed out some water and fell into the arms of her father. "How can I ever thank you?" I wave a dismissive hand at the man. "No thanks necessary."


	17. Evident Tensions

**Cracked Visage**

**Evident Tensions**

"Cloud what are you guys doing here? I thought you were going to Costa del Sol." I turn to Aeris and look up at her. "We were, but we need to catch the ShinRa boat when Rufus leaves. We are waiting till after the parade tomorrow." Zack nods and goes along with my story. I need more time to figure out a story to convince them we changed our minds about leaving. "Oh well we are catching that boat too, so we will have a little more time together?" Why do I have to have Tifa always fawning over me? "Yeah." She glowed at the idea, and I had to suppress a shudder. "Wait a minute!" Oh Shiva here it comes. "BIGGS!?" Zack wrinkled his nose. "Yo Biggs?! How di' you survive, man?" The man shrugged. "Long story. But more importantly those two are working for ShinRa!" Me and Zack raised an eyebrow as Biggs pointed to us. Barret choked, Tifa and Aeris snorted, and Red flicked his tail. Barret spun to face us. "You workin' for ShinRa again, spiky? What the hell?!" I roll my eyes. "Of course Cloud isn't working for ShinRa! He helped us blow up reactors, and he helped infiltrate the ShinRa building in Midgar! He fought the Turks to try and save Sector 7 too! How could you say such a thing!?" Score one for Zack and I. Barret nodded too. "Yea', he did Biggs. Why would he turn back to them after tha'?" Biggs snorted. "They made a deal with Turks in a bar a couple hours ago and even went to the ShinRa building with them! They are traitors!" Aeris huffed. "Stop telling mean lies!" I feel bad for deceiving Aeris like this, but it's for her own safety. "Biggs did you have any head trauma in the Sector 7 accident? Are you sure you're ok?" Biggs growled at me. "Shut up! I know what I saw! You even stopped me when I tried to blow up the bar!" I stand up and brush the sand off of my body. "So you tried to blow up a bar? With innocent people inside it? Biggs I think you are hallucinating." Tifa nodded with me. "Be quiet. I'm fine. You struck a deal with that redheaded Turk! To track AVALANCHE's movements!" I rolled my eyes again. "Me and Zack are going to Costa del Sol and staying there, how could I track AVALANCHE when I'm not even with them, hmm? Besides, I fought a redheaded Turk by the name of Reno to try and save your sorry ass from the plate dropping! Remember that?" I have to admit my lies are pretty good, I might have even believed them.

"All I know is what I saw! How'd ya get the ShinRa bike huh? Or the sword that guy, Zack or whatever, is carrying?" The group turned back to me and Zack with questioning eyes. "We were recognized by some SOLDIERs at an inn, it resulted in a fight. Second classes and up are allowed to have personal vehicles and weapons, and we took theirs. Simple." The group seemed appeased by this answer. "Biggs it's not that we don' believe ya, man, but your story has some holes in it. Spiky may have left AVALANCHE but he's right, if he's in Costa del Sol, how woul' he track us?" Looks like we win. "Let's just head to an inn, ok?" Sweet Aeris, always the peacekeeper. "I agree." Zack and I need this conversation to wrap up before we are discovered. Everyone agrees to move to the inn. Just as everyone heads up the stairs, Biggs stops me and Zack. "Don't think I don't know." I scoff. "Go ahead and try convincing them lies." He snarls at me as we make our way up to the slums. We enter the inn and are greeted by a perky woman. "Oh sirs, you dropped this when you left to go down to the coast!" The woman is talking to man and Zack. I don't react and take the key. "Thank you, it would be hard to get into our room without it." Obviously we were still being watched, thank you Turks for backing up our alibi. Biggs looks like he was slapped. "What time did they check in here?!" The woman looked confused and immediately answered, naturally, "Early this morning. They'd been in their room all day before they went down to the coast for fresh air. On the way out they dropped their key." Bigg's face looked mortified. "But.. they... They were in the bar like two hours ago!" The woman shook her head. "The only exit is the one in front of you, if they used the one in the back it would have set off the fire alarm. They hadn't left all day." Biggs shook his head in confusion. "Told you." I had to rub it in as we made our way to the room. The key had a number printed on it. We opened the door and the bed looked a bit messed up and the bathroom light was on. Oh they are good.

x-x-x

I pulled away from Rufus and straighten my clothes out. My sanity is starting to return. Rufus looks fuckin' sexy though. His hair is mussed up, his lips are red and swollen from fierce kissing, the mark on his neck is still softly bleeding, and his eyes are nice and glazed. "Well that was certainly interestin', yo. I enjoyed myself, you?" He nods at me. My eyes begin to swirl back to green and I can feel it. I shake my head to clear the fog. "It happened again, huh?" Rufus raised an eyebrow. "I suppose one could say that, but it was much more detailed this time. You don't remember anything?" I shake my head lightly. "Only fuzzy bits and pieces, but from the taste of blood and well... you... in my mouth I'm gonna take a guess that it was uhh.. mutual? I hope I ain't gonna get shot for this, or somethin'." He smiles and laughs a little. "No I'm not going to shoot you. Do you have any regrets?" Gaia he shouldn't laugh around me, damn smile makes him fuckin' hot. "Nah. I just know now I'm gonna have ta kiss up to Ryuu again. Gotta find him a girlfriend since I'm the only guy he wants. The kid thinks too highly of me. Doesn't get that I'm dangerous and shit, yo. So where does this leave us, Mr. President?" He chuckles. "I have no idea, where do you want us Reno? And call me Rufus when we are alone." HOLY SHIVA! No one is allowed to call him Rufus or touch him and I can do both, yo! I feel damn special now. "I don't know either, si.. Rufus. I ain't sure of where I wanna be neither. I suppose the best question is: Where are we allowed to be? And do you mind being there?" Oh Gaia, there's that evil smile. "I'm the President of ShinRa Electric Power Company, I can do whatever I want. And I certainly don't mind doing so. All I really want is you, Reno." The blood just went south... I gulped. "Ya sure, Rufus? I'm kinda nuts, ya know." Yep that one statement turned me on. Fuckin' hard on. "I believe I know well enough that your mental state is not as healthy as one would hope, but I can't seem to bring myself to care. Besides, I know you Reno, you get curious. You started looking into my past quite some time ago. Neither of us are really in the right state of mind. And I recall you saying something along the lines of 'I'm attracted to the psychos' and I think I fit that category pretty well. Perhaps we could discuss this in detail when we arrive in Costa del Sol? That would give you some time to tie loose ends."

I swallow again. "Ok sure. But uhh.. I ain't gonna lie ta ya, you're fuckin' sexy when you smile and talk like that. Ya sound dark, yo. I think I like dark..." His eyes flashed with pure, unbridled lust. Oh my Shiva, I am going to have to jack off in the bathroom. "We can discuss that as well in Costa del Sol. Until then I need to finish preparing for the parade, and with you standing there staring at me with lustful eyes, I may find it hard to concentrate on anything other than refraining from fucking you into the 70 levels below us." Shit too much blood in my lower half, brain.. in.. need.. of.. blood! "I just have ta ask before I go, are ya into the whole kinky bondage and dominance shit?" Rufus, now focused on his papers, raises an eyebrow. "It depends on who I am dealing with." My brow furrows in confusion. "Allow me to elaborate; if I am with you when you are normal then yes you would have to deal with me being fairly dominant, even if the position doesn't suggest so. I can be 'uke' without giving up dominance. But if I am with you when you are 'insane', well then I realize it is in my best interest to be submissive in every way, unless you tell me otherwise. But I do, on occasion, like to be 'seme'. That you will just have to deal with." So he's versatile, eh? Fuck he's my friggin' soul mate. "Ok, I'll see ya a bit later, Rufus. I'll take care of the loose ends too..." He smirks from behind his papers. "If you would like one more kiss, you are welcome to it." Is he a mind reader now too? I run up to him, tilt his face upwards and capture those sweet swollen lips one more time. "Ya taste like sugar and snow, Rufus.," I say as I pull away. He smiles and say, "You taste like scotch, cigarettes, and fire." Fire? Fire doesn't have a taste... I make a mental note to ask him later and leave his office. I don't want to push him away with clinginess. I'm kinda excited to see what will happen in Costa del Sol now. Who knew I would actually land my sexy, blond boss? For the first time, I thank Ifrit for making me insane. I head straight to the bathroom for some quality time with lil'Reno.

x-x-x

Those Turks did an awesome job of making it look like our alibi was real, I think even Bidds or whatever his name is, is starting to believe it. Me and Cloud retreated to our room soon after we arrived at the inn. I think we were both sick of the questions. I much prefer what we are doing now anyway. Cloud is laying in my arms and I am sucking on his collarbone. I love the noises he makes when I suck there since it is one of the most sensitive place on his body. "Ahh... Zack... G-Gaia..." I flick my tongue over the hickey I gave him. I wonder what Rufus did to Reno... Probably jumped him. Reno was always excellent in bed... "Z-Zack!" I gotta stop thinking about him when I'm with Cloud, it always causes me to bite down unconsciously. I pull back slightly to survey my work and my little lover. His cheeks are slightly flushed. I have to suppress a shiver looking at him, he is too beautiful for his own good. I lean down again and lick his lips. Cloud tastes so sweet. Like milk and honey. He reminds me of milk and honey in other ways too, his skin is like milk and his hair is like honey. My hands find their way under his shirt and slowly peel it from his body. Hmm... He has a little more muscle definition now... Shiva he is still cute though. Cloud will always have this feminine, yet still masculine, charm to him. When Reno showed me that picture of him dressed like a girl I was seriously fooled for a minute. It was only my intimacy his body that tipped me off that it was really him.

Cloud still has the taste of salt water on him. I lift him into my arms and carry him to the bathroom. I turn on the bath to a reasonable temperature. I looked on the counter with the sink and found a complementary bottle of bubble bath. I squeeze some of the bubbles into the tub and then I strip out of my clothes. I turn to Cloud who is, for the first time that I have ever taken a shower or bath with him, not blushing! "Lose your fear of the naked male body, Cloud?" It wasn't meant to be serious, but he looks like he is considering it. "Yes actually I think I did..." I raise my eyebrow at him. "Congratulations?" He scowls at me. "No Zack, I'm serious. It's not embarrassing anymore and I am actually kind of scared by it. I feel like I'm changing too much." I scoff at the little blonde. "You think too much Cloudy! You are just growing up! Come on you went from sixteen to twenty-one pretty much overnight, and there are major changes between here and there." He nods slowly and I resume striping him of all his clothes.


	18. Significant Question

**Cracked Visage**

**Significant Question**

I still have this undeniable urge to protect and care for Cloud even though he is awake now. I even had to hold down the desire to spoon-feed him back in Kalm. I gently lift him into the bath and I settle in behind him. Cloud leans back and lays his head on my chest. I lace my fingers in his hair and begin to pet and stroke him like a chocobo chick. His hair is so fluffy! I bury my nose in it and inhale deeply. He smells purely of Cloud. It's a sweet, almost floral scent yet not. It has gained some masculinity over the last couple years as Cloud matured from child to adult. I hear a small whimper escape his throat and I pull him even deeper into my arms. Cloud has the tendency to whimper when he is lonely or depressed. I take his face in my hands and press soft soothing kisses all over his face and forehead. I hate it when Cloud is sad. I feel some flashbacks pushing to the surface of my mind and I try to bury them. I don't need to be overwhelmed by pain when I am trying to cure Cloud of his own. Cloud is more important than me, and he always has been. The flood of dark memories won't go down and I wince. "Zack? Are you ok?" I shake my head and grip my hair pulling roughly. The last thing I remember before I pass out is Cloud pressing a kiss to my temple.

- Flashback -

_"Ah specimen Z your latest tests came back excellent. Specimen C's weren't so good."_

_"It appears specimen C is nearly a complete failure. I will only keep him around as a comfort for you, specimen Z."_

_"Excellent results as always, Z."_

_"How pathetic, C. You don't have any uses do you?"_

_"I believe I may dispose of specimen C. He limits your potential Z."_

_"Specimen C is weakening, Z. He will not last much longer."_

_"It's too bad about C's failures. I was hoping he would have the same power as my son, Sephiroth."_

- End Flashback -

x-x-x

I wonder what Tseng favorite color is... Damn I should ask him before our date... no then it will be obvious that I am trying to impress him... Oh this is so confusing. I don't want him to think I'm a slut, but I want him to realize I am in fact a woman. Thank Shiva for being a cup size bigger than Emina. "How is this, hun?" I look up into the mirror where the hairstylist is showing me my new hair. I like it. It's short and manageable for work, and yet stylish for my date with Tseng. "I like it, thank you." The woman smiled and started to spray it with hairspray. "Look here, hun." I look down where another woman is giving me a mani-pedi. "Ooh nice job, thank you!" Ah these company benefits are nice. I start flipping through the magazine again looking at the dresses. Oh my.. that one is perfect! Tseng will love it. It will be a night he will never forget. Damn the PHS is ringing. I use my free hand to put my PHS to my ear.

x-x-x

"Yes?"

"Elena?"

"Oh hey Tseng. Er... Sir."

"Don't worry it's not a business call."

"Oh good. Did you need something?"

"What's your favorite color?"

I snicker to myself.

"Elena?"

"It's navy."

"Really?! Me too..."

I smirk and look down at the midnight navy dress I chose.

"That's nice. Why did you need my favorite color?"

"I.. uhh..."

"Gaia Tseng you are too cute. I will like anything you wear."

"How did you know..?"

"It's in your voice."

"Damn."

I laugh a soft laugh and I hear him gulp on the other side of the phone.

"So I suppose that confirms our date then, huh?"

"Yes it does. I made dinner reservations... Um do you like Wutain?"

Wutain. Yum.

"Of course I do! It's my favorite! How did you know?"

"I.. uhh.. guessed."

Shiva is he nervous. I wonder if he was this nervous with Emina...

"Well you guessed correctly. I can't wait."

"Me either."

"I'll see you tomorrow at the parade, ok? I have a surprise for you."

"What is it?"

"Silly, if I told you it wouldn't be a surprise! You will just have to wait."

"Ok. I'll see you tomorrow then."

"Bye Tseng."

"Bye Elena."

- fake click -

- Distant cheering -

How cute!

- click -

x-x-x

Could this be the man I want to spend the rest of my life with? Holy Shiva.

x-x-x

I can't wait till we get to Costa del Sol! I will make Elena my wife one day, I swear to Leviathan I will.

x-x-x

"Hey Ryuu." He looks up at me. "Hey Reno. How was he?" He seems depressed. I sigh and sit down next to him on the couch in the Turk's lounge. "All we did was kiss, Ryuu. Or rather that's all he said we did." He looked confused. "I can't remember what happens after my other half takes over, yo." Ryuu nods slowly. "So you don't know what happened? You have to go on what he tells you?" I nod slightly. "I have subtle clues. Like the taste of him and blood in my mouth. Or if we had sex, I'd be sore or dirty. But aside from that I have ta listen to him." I wrap my arms around him and he leans into me. "What's going to happen now?" I shrug. "I think we are going to try the 'dating' thing for awhile. It never really works out for me, but hell if he isn't afraid of dying suddenly or some shit like that, then he can be my guest, yo." Ryuu buries himself deeper into my arms. "But I'm not afraid..." I shake my head. "But you're also sane, yo. I ain't gonna be the one ta fuck ya up my love. He is genetically enhanced to be stronger than most and can fight back." Ryuu looks up at me with sad eyes. " But I'm a Turk." I smile at my little protégé. "Nah it won't help. I'm too strong sweet'eart." He frowns at me and pushes his face back into my chest. "Can I still be your friend?" I gasp at him in disbelief. "Of course ya can! You'll always be my friend Ryuu! More then my friend in fact! You're my family!" Finally he offers me a smile. "Can we sleep together at least once Reno?" Holy... "Are ya sure, Ryuu? I thought ya weren't gay and shit." Why am I tryin' ta talk him out of this? I want it too, yo! "I am gay for you and only you. I want you to be the first and only guy I ever sleep with." I just gape at him for minute. What did I do to deserve this little beauty? "Of course Ryuu." He crushes his lips to mine. I savor his lips since it's probably the last time I will get to taste his rum flavored lips. "You taste like Rufus. Or well I guess that's Rufus. Sort of like..." I cut him off. "Sugar and snow." He nods and attacks my lips again.

Tseng chooses right now to walk in. "Reno please move to your apartment." All the Turks get apartments in all the ShinRa buildings. "But sir! We are kind of comfortable! And... and.. What's up with you? You look too happy to be Tseng..." Me and Ryuu pull out our weapons and point them at Tseng. "Prove that you are really Tseng, and then explain what has you so happy!" Tseng shrugs and pours himself a glass of sake. "I'm going to dock your paychecks if you don't stop pointing those at me." That's good enough for me. We both scramble to put them away. "And... Elena agreed to go on a date with me in Costa del Sol." My eyes nearly popped out of my skull. I thought she didn't like him... Well that's what she said when we screwed... "Nice boss! You seem pretty head over heels for 'er." Ryuu was right, Tseng looked like a lovesick teenager... "I think I am in love." HOLY FUCK!! "WHAT?!" Tseng rolled his eyes. "I think I am in love. She is amazing. Smart, strong, skilled, beautiful..." Excellent in bed... I add mentally. "That's awesome for you Tseng. You gonna marry her or somethin', yo?" Tseng look thoughtful for a moment. "I just might." WHAT THE FUCK? Me and Ryuu pull out our weapons again and point them, hands shaking. "Now we know you ain't Tseng! You're some freak! Ya look like 'im, but you ain't him!" Tseng shook his head and left the room. We were shocked for a full minute before we returned to kissing each other into oblivion.

x-x-x

Now that was interesting... I may have to show Elena that tape. I think she would find it as interesting as me, if not more. Tseng may be playing with fire with her though... then again I can't really say much. Oh look Reno and Ryuu are going at it again. Just wait till Costa, Reno, just wait... He will be the last thing on your mind then.

x-x-x

"Wake up, Zack! Please wake up!" Why won't he wake up? He doesn't even move. All he does is breathe. I guess I should be thanking the Lifestream that he is at least doing that. "Ngh..." I jump slightly, not expecting him to move. "Come on sweetie, wake up!" He groans again. "C-Cloud?" Thank Shiva. "Yes, it's me Zack. Don't worry I'm here." His eyes flutter open and I feel tears of relief roll down my cheeks. "Hey Cloudy-kins, don't cry. I'm ok. I just feel like I was hit by a ShinRa issued truck." I laugh a little though my tears continue. "Have I ever told you how much I love you Cloud?" I smile down at the love of my life. "Yes, but I'd like to hear it again please." He smiles weakly. "You are my sun, my sky, my stars, my moon, my Gaia, my everything. You brighten my entire life and save me everyday with just your smile. I'd give my life for you over and over to see you happy. I want you in every way. I find you beautiful, desirable, strong, smart, funny, kind, a little moody at times, but you wouldn't be Cloud without your own Cloudy moments." Zack sits up and pulls me into his arms. I had moved us out of the bathtub when he passed out, we are on our bed now. "Cloud I have wanted to know something for awhile. I wanted to find out before Nibelheim and Hojo, but I couldn't find the right moment. And after everything, just waking up to see you looking over me, like the guardian angel you are, you proved this is a good time as any." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a tiny box. I feel the tears start to fall even faster. He opened the little box and showed it to me. "I've been carrying this my whole life looking for the right person. I once thought it was Aeris, but I was wrong. It was my mother's, she gave it to me before I left to join SOLDIER and she told me to give it to the person I love the most. I think that's you. Cloud will you marry me?"

x-x-x

Please Gaia, say yes...

x-x-x

I stare at the ring in the box. It's beautiful. It is a nice sized diamond set in silver. I choke slightly with my tears. "Of c-course I will Z-Zack. I would l-love to. B-But we need t-to wait until things s-settle d-down, y'know? But I swear I w-will." Zack's face erupted in a grin and he pulled the little ring out of the box and took my hand. The ring fit perfectly. "Wear it until we are ready. As long as you wear that ring I will always be with you. Never take it off." I nod tearfully at him. The ring looks right on my hand, like it was meant to be there. "Now we just need to get to Gongaga to tell my folks!" I have to laugh at Zack's enthusiasm; he acts like we are going to get married tomorrow in a huge country-family wedding. "Do your parents even know you're bi?" He shakes his head while still grinning. "Nah, but they are gonna find out real soon, huh?" I smile and cup his face in my hands. He does the same to me and pulls me close for a kiss. "I love you Zack Fair." He smirks into the kiss at my mumbled words of love. "I love you too Cloud Strife. Or should I say Fair?" I laugh and nibble at his lips.


	19. Doubted Stability

**Cracked Visage**

**Doubted Stability**

A knock at our door interrupts us again, but at least I didn't try to take off Zack's tongue this time. "Come in." Aeris and Tifa enter the room. "Hey boys, we were wondering if you wanted to hang out, us girls are lonely." I nod at Aeris and they take a seat on the bed. Aeris spots my hand and gasps. "Oh Cloud! Zack! Congratulations! Oh I'm so excited for you!" Tifa looked at her confused. "What do you mean Aeris?" Aeris pointed to my hand and Tifa had the same reaction. "Oh my Shiva. Is that...?" I nod and Tifa's eyes get teary. "Congratulations, Cloud, Zack." Zack wraps an arm around my waist and grins. "Scariest moment of my life! Nothing compares to proposing in the fear factor. Give me monsters, Turks, or Sephiroth any day, but the fear that he would reject me was horrible." I snort and kiss him on the cheek. As if I'd ever reject him. Aeris' eyes were sparkling with tears too. I hoped she wasn't unhappy that Zack and I are getting married. She wiped them away and sobbed quietly. "What's up Aeris?" She smiled at Zack and the smile was genuine, I felt myself calm down slightly. "I am so happy for you both. You two make such a good pair. I am happy true love prevailed." Aeris is such an angel...

"So when is the wedding? I had better be invited!" I'm glad Tifa was making an attempt to lighten the mood. "We are going to wait awhile till the whole ShinRa thing calms down a bit. But of course you're invited. All of AVALANCHE is." I meant what I said, I wanted them at my wedding for some reason. I feel like they are something of family now. Tifa smiled brightly. "You going to wear a dress again, Cloud?" Aeris giggled at me. I flushed bright red and grumbled unintelligible words. "Nah, I want to marry my deal MALE Cloud." Tifa looked a bit confused at Zack's statement, though I don't understand what could be confusing about it. "I thought you swung both ways, Zack." He nodded. "Yeah I do, but Cloud is male and I love him for everything he is and I don't want him to be anything he's not. Don't want him to pretend he's a woman when he isn't." I scoffed. "I don't PRETEND to be a woman. I just had to so I could save Tifa. But aside from that I don't do the whole cross-dressing thing." Aeris giggled again. "What?! I don't!" Zack snickered and patted me on the back. Assholes.

x-x-x

I dragged Ryuu back to my apartment after Rude came into the lounge and told us to leave. I pulled us inside and bolted the door before yanking Ryuu back to my room, making out with him the whole way. As soon as I was in the bedroom I tugged his shirt over his head to reveal his chiseled chest and abs. "Gaia you're sexy, Ryuu." It wasn't a lie either. He was fuckin' steaming. I had a naggin' feelin' in the back of my mind that Rufus was watchin' right that moment, probably jacking off to us like porn, but I didn't really care. I stripped out of my shirt and pants. Neither me nor Ryuu were in the Turk uniform since we were supposed to be off duty. I shed him of his pants leaving us in boxers. "Ugh... Reno... Fuck... You are so hot." I smirked down at him. I was going to make this first time with a guy worth it for him. I licked a path down to his nipples, sucking on each one and pinching the other. Moans were spilling out of his throat. I continued down till I reached his navel. I dipped my tongue into the little indent and licked in a circular motion. Ryuu looked like he was going to have an orgasm just from the foreplay. "Doesn't look like ya are going to last long, huh?" He shook his head quickly, his eyes glazed and lips parted. I moaned softly and captured his bottom lip in between mine and sucked on it slightly. I started to remove his boxers slowly, brushing my hand over his sensitive area. Ryuu moaned deeply into my mouth. After he was completely naked, I removed my own boxers, leaving us both hot and with skin to skin. "Reno!" He arched his back as I gave him one teasing stroke. "Ya like that don't ya my little love?" He whimpered his pleasure to me. I licked the shell of his ear causing a throaty moan to be released from the younger Turk. "What is it ya want, my sweet?" He whimpered and moaned slightly at my husky tone. "I want you inside'a me." I groaned hotly at his answer. "As ya wish."

I slid down his body, making sure to grind our obvious erections together. He gasped and bucked his hips into mine, getting a moan from me. I reached over to the nightstand and pulled out a bottle of lube. I oiled up my fingers and thrust two inside of him. Ryuu cried out in pain and pleasure, but I knew he could had it, he was a Turk after all, and I was'a bit impatient myself, yo. I scissored around inside him, searching for his prostate. I knew I had found it when Ryuu screamed loud with pleasure. Gaia I love vocal lovers. I pressed my two fingers hard into his prostate and rubbed over it. Ryuu sobbed out pleasure and shook beneath my touch. I didn't give him any warning and pulled out my two fingers then shoving three back inside. He cried out again and I found myself thanking the Lifestream that ShinRa made soundproofed walls. "Ya think you are ready for the real thing?" He nodded quickly at me and I pulled my fingers out of him. I took the lube and coated my dick and then stuck a very oily finger inside him and lubed his tight passage. I threw his legs over my shoulders and positioned myself at his puckered entrance. "Here we go, Sweetie. If ya want ta back out, tell me now." He shook his head obviously not capable of words at the moment. I nodded at him and pushed the head in. Ryuu tightened around me and I gripped the bed sheets to restrain from pushing all the way into him. When he loosened a bit, I slid another two inches in. I am about 10 ½ inches all together. Ryuu groaned and tried not to clench around me in vain. It took a few minutes before I was all the way inside him and Ifrit was he tight. Tight and hot. He whimpered and squirmed under me with a combination of pain and pleasure. After a few minutes I felt him push his hips against me. "Move dammit." I quickly complied by pulling nearly all the way out and slamming back in. Ryuu screamed really loud and I captured his lips, swallowing the sound. I rocked my hips roughly into his. I pounded into his prostate and tears of pure pleasure ran down his cheeks where I lapped them up. He started to clench down around me and his whines became screams as he got close to the edge. I roughly grabbed his member and began pumping it with my thrusts.

Ryuu sobbed out words of love and endearment in his lust-clouded state. He pleaded for a climax and I delivered. I felt his whole body clamp down around me and his body shook fiercely as he exploded into mindblowing orgasm over my chest, hand, and his stomach. I followed close behind, coating his insides with my semen. Exhausted, I collapsed on top of Ryuu and didn't even bother to pull out of him as sleep over came both of us. I rolled us onto our sides and brushed his bangs out his sleepy eyes. He gave me a tired smile and whispered thanks. I kissed him softly on his lips and fell into a deep restful sleep. Ryuu smiled one last time and did the same. I'm glad now that I made the choice to stop him in the garage. He is important to me. I don't think I could imagine my life without him anymore. I just hope Rufus can fit in here too, cause I'm starting to feel something for him. A light tingle in my stomach every time I look at him... It's actually enjoyable...

x-x-x

I don't know how they did it. There is no way that wasn't them in the bar. I was right there! How could they pull this off though? Am I really losing my mind? But no, I'd never met Zack before the bar. And he was identical at the coast... That proves it! No wait... His picture was on the announcement in Midgar... Dammit. I can't believe this. I know I'm not crazy... Am I? Fuck I hate self-doubt. No one believes me either, even if I was right. Barret doesn't believe me and Tifa is in love with Cloud. The two others aren't even AVALANCHE members for Odin's sake! How can I convince them that Cloud and Zack are traitors if I can't even convince myself and I don't even know half the group! This is bullshit. Total and complete bullshit. Elfé where are you when I need you?

- Flashback -

_"I will always be there for you Elfé."_

_"I know Sears. That's why I love you."_

_"I love you too. When this is all over will you stay with me? Be my wife? Have my children?"_

_"Of course. I just hope we live to see such a day."_

_"Me too."_

_"I'll always be there for you too, you know that right?"_

_"Yes I do. We will stick together till the end."_

_"Yes. Yes we will."_

- End Flashback -

Does that make me a liar? I think so. Gaia I miss you my sweet Elfé... I cry sometimes when I'm alone. I think of you. You are the only one I have ever loved. I thought I had a chance with Jessie, but I really didn't. Everyone I care for ends up dead or hurt. Why can't I ever be happy? Why was I cursed like this? Why couldn't I get the Zirconaide Materia and you get the Revive? Then you would be safe... I'd be happy as long as you were safe. I'd give anything to see you again. I guess it is my job to protect AVALANCHE now that you're not here though. I'm doing a great fucking job... I let two traitors slip in and they will probably be our downfall! Fuck! Why don't I ever do things right!? I can never do anything right! Not even the one job you left me with! AVALANCHE is all that's left of you and I am supposed to protect it and yet I can't even convince them that two of the members are working for ShinRa! Ex-SOLDIERs my ass. It looks like they are current SOLDIERs! But that still doesn't explain how they created such a sound lie though... They even had a witness to back up the story... How dammit!? Could the woman have been paid off? But how? The time gap is too narrow. Two hours isn't enough time to go to ShinRa, get a bike, pay off an inn worker, go to the room make it look lived-in, and then make it down to the coast to save the girl... But they could have done the just ShinRa thing or just the inn thing... They couldn't be accomplished together. This is too damn confusing for me. Maybe I am insane. It would be fitting. The last original AVALANCHE member goes crazy! I can see the headlines now. Then more people like Cloud and Zack would infiltrate the group! But then again... If I am really crazy then people like Cloud and Zack would be good people. Fuck all I am succeeding in is confusing myself!


	20. Cruel Fabrications

**Cracked Visage**

**Cruel Fabrications**

Well that was certainly entertaining. Reno looks to be quite the animal in bed... I am fairly aroused actually. I may have to call in that useless secretary of mine and make her do her primary job. All the secretaries my father had hired for me were whores. Whores with annoying squeaky voices over the intercom... I hate them when I have a migraine. I often shoot them to shut them the hell up. I don't even really feel like the president... I quite enjoy killing and getting my own hands dirty... metaphorically of course. I am loathe to actually stain my hands with blood. My suits are too pristine to soil with dirty, slum blood. I suppose that is the mindset of a ShinRa, but I don't honestly care. I like my clothes blood-free thank you. Dark Nation whimpers at my feet and I scratch him behind his ears. My sweet pet. Dark Nation was a mutated guard hound of Hojo's before I took him for my own. Hojo was not happy, but at the end of my shotgun he really had no choice in the matter. My father was not happy either. He called Dark Nation a mutt and a creature. I didn't see it that way. I saw Dark Nation as a much needed friend. He soothes me by being just as strange as me, just on the outside rather than inside. I tend to align myself with other "freaks" since they seem to understand me better. Reno is a prime example. Tseng is as well. Tseng is a traitor to his own country of Wutai. He joined us and even fought his own people in the Wutain War. Tseng is a good friend of mine and he will remain so. I just hope he makes the right decisions in regards to Elena. His relationship with Emina put some distance between us because the foolish girl believed that I may one day realize that I had feelings for her and whisk her away in a chocobo-drawn carriage. What an idiot. Elena seems a bit more grounded and from the way she did things in Mithril Mines she is also more intelligent and a better Turk. I pray that she feels the same things for Tseng as he does for her. If not I may have to get involved. But so far she seems to be just as interested. That is fortunate for her.

x-x-x

This dress is amazing. Tseng is going to love it. I've tried it on five times over tonight. When I was in the store I even checked out wedding dresses. I feel pathetic planning our wedding before our first date, but for some reason I can't help myself. I think I have really fallen in love. I am happy that it is Tseng. He is a strong, smart, handsome, powerful man. He will make an excellent husband. And not to mention, he pretty much raised Rufus so he will make a great father too! Our children will be beautiful! I hope I can give him a son... He deserves a son. He would have his father's dark hair and my pale skin. He would have our brown eyes. Simply beautiful... Looking at myself in the wedding dresses was the most amazing feeling ever. I can't wait till I get to walk down the aisle with him waiting for me at the end of the aisle. He isn't the kind of person to get cold feet either. I hope he is the kind of person who wants marriage quickly. Emina would have never said yes... She wanted to have his baby, but she wouldn't have married him that quick. I know it. She had too many feelings for Rufus. I thought it was disgusting. She shouldn't have been having Tseng's child if she didn't want him! "Oh really, little sister?" WHAT IN THE NAME OF ODIN? I turn to the mirror of my bathroom. "E-Emina?!" She smirked back at me. I pick up my margarita and sniff it slightly. Nothing out of the ordinary. Oh Shiva... "I'M DEAD!?" Emina laughed. "No. I get just a few minutes to talk to you." I nod slowly. I have officially gone crazy. Why did it have to be her I see? Why not mom? "You can't have him." I snapped my head up to look at her. I growled out angrily. "You don't own him. You didn't love him. And you are dead. Tseng can be with me if he wants!" She laughs bitterly. "He is only using you to replace me." She is a liar. "Not true. We are nothing alike. And we don't even really look alike either. I got mom's looks, you got dad's." She snorts. "That's what I mean. When he realizes we aren't alike in the least, he will leave you." I scoff at her image. "I doubt that. Tseng is smart enough to spot an upgrade when one lands in his lap." I hate that condescending face if hers... "You landed right in his lap alright. You were always such a slut Elena." Oh. No. She. Didn't. "You know what? Fuck you. Fuck dad. And fuck everything you say." I pull out my gun and shoot the mirror. It shatters and Emina is erased. I'm not going to let her get to me... Dammit... Am I really a slut?

x-x-x

Mine and Elena's date will be perfect. I made sure to have the restaurant closed only for us. I requested candle-lit dinner. My suit is navy... her favorite color. She is going to love it and then she will fall in love with me. My suit at our wedding will be navy too. I even started looking at some today. Our wedding will be perfect. Simply perfect. She will make an excellent wife. She is smart, strong, powerful, and beautiful. And not to mention, she is protective so she will make a great mother too! "Is that what you really think Tseng?" What in the name of Leviathan? "E-EMINA!?" How could she possibly be alive?! "Tseng she isn't like that. She is a slut and she slept with Reno her first night in the Turks! I want someone better for you! How do you think it makes me feel up here in the Lifestream to watch you date my sister? Did you forget I was having your BABY?" I choked on tears. "No I didn't, but I am so lonely. I need someone to love and love me back, Emina. Can't you understand that?" She frowned at me. Oh Gaia I hate that frown. It means she is angry or upset... Or both. "I don't like this Tseng. She doesn't love you and never will. She had always wanted to out-do me and you are just another conquest in her desire to do so." I can't believe that. "You never loved me either.," I whisper quietly. She gasps. "What? Are you believing her lies now?! Of course I loved you. I..." I hold up my hand to cut her off. "You wanted Rufus, Emina. I know that now. All I ever was to you was a substitute. How can you claim to love me when you used to cry out his name!?" She scoffed in disbelief. "Why would I have your baby if I wanted him?" I shrug slightly. "I don't know, but I'm sorry Emina. You're dead now and I need to do things for myself. I want to try this with Elena. I think she wants to too. I will make my own mistakes thank you. I love you, but good bye." I punch the mirror, shattering it. I meant it. I need to make my own mistakes and learn on my own... Did she really sleep with Reno?

x-x-x

I watch Cloud fall asleep in my arms. He is perfect in every way. I can't believe he actually said yes. I have wanted to ask him to marry me for over five years! I am so happy. When this is all over with ShinRa and we have a stable life we will have a beautiful wedding. I will make sure it's just how he wants it. If he wants big, he'll get big. If he wants small, he'll get small. If he wants a chocobo-shaped cake, he'll get it. I don't care what the request it, I will make sure it happens for him. But right now I can feel the tension taking it's toll on both of us. Hopefully Costa del Sol will bring some much needed relaxation... But I'm not counting on it...


	21. Terrifying Nightmare

**Cracked Visage**

**Terrifying Nightmare**

_Sephiroth is looking straight at me. He is standing in the middle of a blazing fire. That fire is all that is left of my hometown, Nibelheim. "You're a worthless grunt. That's all you will ever be. You know you could never have been a SOLDIER, Cloud. Give up such a pathetic dream. You and I are brothers... We share a mother, and she is calling for her sons. Join me or you shall suffer mother's wrath." Brothers? How could we be brothers? He just killed my mother! "Liar! You killed my mother, we aren't brothers... you're a monster!" That laugh. It's so cruel and dark. "Believe what you will my little brother, but eventually you will join me and welcome mother back to her rightful place as ruler of this Minerva forsaken planet." I shake my head slowly at first and then gain some speed, before shaking it as fast as I can. "No... No... NO! I WILL NEVER JOIN YOU! I'M NOT A MONSTER! I'M NOT LIKE YOU! I CAN'T BE LIKE YOU! I... I'm not..." I begin to thrash wildly. "No... never..."_

x-x-x

"NO!" I sit up quickly in bed screaming out. Zack wakes up and grabs his sword, looking around before settling on me. He drops his sword and pulls me into his comforting arms. "Shh... Shh... It's ok..." No it's not. That dream was so real... I sob in his arms, searching for comfort. "Nightmare, Sweetheart?" I sob louder to confirm his observation. He squeezes me softly and pets my hair. My sobs begin to slow down and I bury my face into his chest and inhaled deeply. Zack's scent always calms me down. It's something about the way he smells that makes me feel safe in his arms. His heartbeat is steady and calming. I feel him kissing the top of my head. I look up at him with my tear stained face. I can see worry and pain in his eyes. I know it scares him a lot when something is wrong with me. He leans down and kisses my tears away softly. His lips are so soft when he is taking care of me. He presses kisses to my closed eyes, cheeks, forehead, and the tip of my nose. I notice he avoids my mouth, because he is trying to be soothing not arousing. "What was it about?" I look at him with sad eyes and he senses my distress. "Nibelheim, huh?" I nod softly and frown deeper. He kisses the corners of my mouth softly. I don't resist when he stands up, but I hold on to his arm and give him a scared look. "I'm not leaving, sweetie, I'm just going to take us to the bath." He lifts me into his arms and carries me to the bathroom. He makes the water cold like only I like it. He slides into the water putting me down on his chest and in between his legs. I lay my head limply on his chest as he pets me. "Shh... Nothing will ever hurt you, I will be there for you. Remember? I promised." I thank the Lifestream for Zack's innate ability to soothe me. I'm glad he is the man I fell in love with. He makes life better for me, and I do believe he loves me. He has taken care of me every time I needed him to, he saved me from Hojo when it would have been easier for him to escape on his own, he looks after me before anyone else, and he is always there for me no matter how trivial my fears are.

"Am I like him?" My voice is sore and broken. I realize after I said it that he may not know who I was referring to. "No. You're Cloud, a human, a caring person, you are my love. Sephiroth was a monster. I doubt anything less than another monster could be like him." I sigh softly with relief. For some reason I believe Zack's words more than my own. I feel like I can't trust myself anymore. These strange desires... The desire to kill... They scare me and they are becoming more frequent too. I suppose working for a terrorist organization I can quench the desires easily, but still why do I have them? Sometimes I wonder, why me? What did I do to deserve all of this? Why did I even try to join SOLDIER? I know I shouldn't complain, because I am alive, I have Zack, and I have friends. Yet I still wish I could turn back time and change some things. Like Sephiroth. If I could, I would have declined the mission and asked Zack to do the same. He would have done it as long as I asked. Then Sephiroth could go nuts and kill everyone without me being there to see it. And then we would have never been given over to Hojo, and therefore we could still be in SOLDIER and on track to getting married. As of now, I need more time before we marry, I have a feeling we may never make it to the alter, but I would never say that to Zack. He seems so happy. And it makes me happy and calmer to see him like that. He is always a ray of light to everyone. He never seems to be unhappy for too long. I do see that he has sobered slightly over the last few weeks... I suppose that is a side-affect of being with Hojo... I think Zack remembers what happened... All the terrible things that Hojo did to us. I think it was worse for me too, since he never talks about it in front of me. He is afraid I might remember, I think. But he also went through the same things, and, if he does remember, it has to be terrible. And yet he can still smile... So as long as Zack is smiling I can pretend to smile too.

x-x-x

Ah what a refreshing day. The parade will be underway in a merely a hour or so. Reno was awake and on duty rather early today. Perhaps he is as excited to get to Costa del Sol as I am. The longer I look at him the more I get the urge to run my hands through that seemingly silky fire red hair of his. If I hadn't seen him in "action" myself I would have guessed it was dyed that red. But, no, in fact, it's very much natural. I find his natural edge and exotic features thrilling and invigorating. I have never really had sex for the pleasure of it. Being raped by Heidegger took nearly all the "fun" out of the act. Yet as of late, I have felt somewhat "frustrated". I have been using that secretary of mine more often. This trip to Costa del Sol could not have come soon enough. I am quite pleased to finally be the President of my company. I am no longer the "ShinRa heir", but, instead, the ShinRa president. The Turks are once again mine as well. Including Reno. Which is quite perfect. Time to prepare for my first public appearance as President.

x-x-x

I can't wait, yo. Rufus is lookin' fuckin' sexy today. Maybe that's cause I got laid last night for the first time in like a week. I'm ridin' a natural high right now baby. I'm fuckin' ready for this mini-vacation. I dealt with the crew of the ship, they know that AVALANCHE is allowed onboard, but they can't acknowledge they know it is them. I'm so happy, yo. I get to screw Rufus fuckin' ShinRa soon! Now maybe these damn wet dreams'll stop. He is really too sexy for his own good. The intimidation factor makes him like a'million times sexier too. Scary and sexy. Two words that almost completely sum up Rufus ShinRa. Throw in "cold" and you have a complete description, yo. This boat ride is gonna be hell though. Poor Ryuu gets seasick. I'm gonna have ta help him out with that. I'll hold back his hair and kiss his neck or somethin'. I'm glad I've never been afflicted with the damn sickness, I throw up enough from my drinkin', thank ya very much. Rude an' me are on Presidential guard today. We gotta watch Rufus' door. Sucky, yo. I'd much prefer ta be watchin' him up close, but this allows me and Rude ta have a drink before work really begins. I pull out my flask and take a long sip before passing it to Rude. He didn't like scotch when I first met him.. or smoke.. but I've got 'im hooked on both. He doesn't smoke much, only when he's nervous or on a long mission. I chain smoke cause I know it ain't gonna kill me. Ifrit keeps me safe from smoke and cancer. Heh, at least it means I can smoke happily without worrying about dyin'. The door opens slightly. Parade time, yo!

x-x-x

There are far too many people here right now. How the hell did we get roped into be part of the Guard ceremony? I don't know how to do arms demonstrations anymore! Cloud looks like he knows what he is doing though. I probably shouldn't be worried, but I don't want to make a fool of myself. I try to practice some maneuvers, but I keep messing up. This is going to be absolute hell for me. Why did our SOLDIER outfits have to stick out like a sore thumb? "-Ptst- Cloud." He turns slightly to me. "Yes Zack?" His voice is at a hushed whisper. "What do I do!?" He chuckles softly at me and I pout a little. "Follow my moves, and don't worry if you mess up, I'll keep them focused on me." I nod slightly. The Sergeant barks out and order and we start marching into the line. We were late so we have to sneak in while the other cadets and grunts are already marching down the street. We take our positions in line and march down the street. Our Sergeant orders us to follow him. Oh Shiva... We are part of the send-off crew. "Present Arms!" I hold the gun out in front of me and stand at attention. "Left." They turn left... I turn right... Damn. "Right." I turn forward again and the other do too. The Sergeant looks like he is going to have a heart attack. We start the routine with the guns. Cloud does it perfectly... I screw up several times. I drop my gun twice and make almost every move at the wrong time, putting me out of sync. Cloud is at the head of the line leading. Luckily, I am towards the middle of the group and not in plain view. Rufus looks bored. Prick.

x-x-x

I'm waiting on the boat... Elena should be coming in soon from the parade. My heart is pounding in my chest. I've decided to the let the Reno thing slide, after all he is Reno the Playboy. I wonder what that surprise was... Oh Shiva, I am a teenage girl. I am supposed to be a grown man with pride and... Oh Leviathan someone knocked on the door. "Tseng?" I choke to myself. "Yes." She giggled at my tone. "Close your eyes." I do as she says and I hear the door swing open. "Open." ...Wow... If I didn't think she was beautiful before, I sure do now...

x-x-x

I wonder if he likes it... "So?" How cute... his eyes are wide and he is stuttering. "Y-You're v-very b-beautiful, Elena." I laugh softly. "Thank you, Tseng. I needed to make it shorter for work, but I wanted you to like it." I bite my lip and I really want to ask him if he thinks that I'm a slut. He is biting his lip too. "Did you see Emina last night!?," We both blurt out at the same time. "Yes!," in unison. "Do you think that I'm a slut?!" and "Did you sleep with Reno!?" came next. Then, "No! Of course I don't." and "Uh... Kind of..". Oh for Gaia's sake.


	22. Harsh Repercussions

**Cracked Visage**

**Harsh Repercussions**

This was almost too easy. We just walked right on to the boat. It seems a little fishy if you ask me. Not to mention Rufus handed me a key discreetly when he walked by. Heidegger gave Cloud some trinket for being the best or some shit. The key was wrapped in a piece of paper. On the paper "Second floor of the boat. Don't get caught by crew or AVALANCHE. Good luck." was written. I showed it to Cloud and he nodded at me. We climbed to the second level of the boat quietly. Up here there were no guards, just Turks. Reno was rubbing his little friend's back as he got seasick. He whipped around quickly ready to scold us for being up on this level when we took off our helmets. "Ah it's you guys. Heya! Rufus wants ya ta pay'im a visit. It's just down that way." He pointed the way for us and we walked down to the door. I went to put the key in the lock when Cloud held up a hand. "Hear that?," He whispered at me. I listened and then nodded. There was faint talking. We put our ears to the door to hear what was being said. It sounded like Heidegger. "It's a shame about your old man, Rufus. He was a good president. Knew just where to take the company and when. No one will ever fill his shoes. Not with that 'fear' technique. Besides, my boy, you're just not frightening with that blonde hair and big blue eye combo."

x-x-x

This ignorant fool must not know what the repercussions are for the repugnant babble that is being spouted from that hole in his hideous face. "Heidegger." He stops talking for a moment... Shocking. "What?" His voice is full of unwarranted indignance. "Shut up." I know it wasn't exactly eloquent, but at the moment nothing sums up my displeasure at his talking than that. He sneers. "You think just because your father croaked you can order me around? I am older than you, boy. And if you remember, much more of a man." I blink in silence. Did he just say what I think I heard? Did he dare to say I was less of a man than him? Or that my place as president is still below him because I am younger? "Much more of a man?" I have to repeat his last statement. "If I recall, boy, you weren't very impressive." I snort. "I was eleven." He laughs. "I was ten times bigger at eleven than you are right now, I'm sure." I narrow my eyes at the disgustingly imbecilic man before me. Perhaps I should educate him in the manner in which he should address the President of ShinRa. I turn my narrowed eyes towards the door to the room. Heidegger stops laughing and looks at the door. "Enter." I make my voice louder so that they can clearly hear me. The sound of a key being placed in the lock and turned fills the room. The two enter the room with confused faces. Heidegger jumps out of his chair. "You're those fugitives!" He begins to pull out his handgun. I roll my eyes. "Sit back down Heidegger, you are embarrassing this company. Both work for me." The pig looked dumbfounded. "You hired them to kill your father?!" I laugh at this. "I've hired hundreds of people to kill my father, none have ever gotten the job done, but no these men work for me in a different light. One that I am loathe to reveal to someone as loose-lipped as you." Heidegger fumed at me for my comment. "I'm high up in this company. I deserve to know what you are planning, boy. Your father is probably rolling around in his grave." I laugh nearly hysterically.

"Heidegger sit back down. I have no plans to tell you about my agenda. Be happy I have yet to kill you." The dolt sneered. "You could never find someone stupid enough to try and kill me. I have the best shot in the company." I pull out my gun and shoot him while looking at Zack and Cloud. Heidegger coughs up blood and falls to the ground. "Wrong you sniveling bastard. Tseng has the best shot in the company, followed closely by me. Now if you will please die there, or I will have to shoot you again later for bleeding on my carpet." Heidegger choked on blood as he scrambled to stand. "You spineless little punk!" Damn, he can still speak. I aimed for his vocal chords, but must have missed by a fraction, limiting his speech capacity yet not rendering him voiceless. That is why I am only the second best shot. I press the button the the underside of my chair's arm. Reno comes into the room quickly with his weapon out. "Yes sir?" I point at Heidegger. "I shot him. Have him carried to the infirmary and healed, he still has uses to me. But please make sure he is left completely mute and emasculated." Reno got a gleam in his eye. "Right away sir! Tseng! Come help me carry this fat bastard!"

x-x-x

Tseng helped Reno carry Heidegger out of the room. I have to admit the idea of him mute and his manhood taken was a big improvement. "May I complement you on a very good decision? That was nearly tearfully beautiful." Rufus laughed at my comment. "Very much agreed. I've been waiting so many long years to do that." Rufus proceeded to explain that Hojo had retired suddenly and was in Costa del Sol too... Lovely.

x-x-x

This is strange... It seems that Zack and Cloud are hiding from ShinRa just as much as us... Maybe they really are with AVALANCHE or just on their own. I'm still watching them closely, but they have yet to do anything really out there... Hold on. What the fuck was that noise? I duck behind a crate. Oh Gaia... Is that Sephiroth?! Damn he killed a crew member and guard. Time to go find everyone, it looks like there is going to be a situation.

x-x-x

I'm trying hard to stay in character. It's pretty hard to pretend to be a man with a chest like this. I can't find anyone else, but I guess it doesn't matter till we are in Costa del Sol. It makes me sad to know Cloud is marrying Zack, I guess I really have no hope of being with him... Is that Biggs? Why does he look so scared? I wave him over. "Who is it?" I tell him it's Tifa. "Tifa! I just saw Sephiroth on board! He is down below in the engine room!" Shiva help us all.

x-x-x

Hojo is in Costa del Sol? Oh looks like my revenge may come early. "Do I have your permission to kill him?" Rufus laughed quietly, he's laughed a lot while we were here, I think shooting Heidegger has something to do with it. "Actually I was going to ask you to do that for me. I need him dead because of all the ShinRa secrets he knows. Please dispose of him as you desire, but make sure at the end he is not breathing." Oh I could kiss Rufus ShinRa at the moment. Cloud looked fairly excited too. "Now I believe you should get back down to the deck, it seems your friends are looking for you." I look in the direction Rufus is staring and I spot a tv monitor with surveillance feed. "You like to watch people, don't you?" Rufus nods silently and waves a hand towards the door before changing the channel on the tv to focus on Reno torturing Heidegger. Me and Cloud leave the room. I sweep him into a fierce kiss as soon as we are out of sight, back on the deck. "I'm kinda excited." I have to agree with Cloud. It's a nice feeling. "Cloud, Zack! Sephiroth is on board!" Oh no. Please Shiva give us a break!

x-x-x

Cloud looks at me with frightened eyes. Why in the world are their helmets off? Don't they know they could get caught? None the less, Cloud looks upset. "No...," He whispers. "He is down in the engine room. I saw him kill a crew member and a guard. We need to stop him!" Tifa takes off her helmet and looks at Cloud, her eyes are fearful too. Zack is shaking. What in the hell? "Why are you all freaking out? I know you aren't a fan of the guy, but why are you having a panic attack?" Tifa looks up at me. "Sephiroth is the one who burned down me and Cloud's hometown. Zack was there as well. He is someone we aren't ready to fight. He is too strong. But I don't think anyone really believed he was alive before now." So it's denial, huh? Well then they need start realizing that it's true and start to stand against him. "That doesn't change the fact that he is here now and we need to do something about it." Cloud nodded slowly. "Show me where he is." I smile, now that is the attitude I'm looking for. Maybe Cloud isn't so bad. "Alright! Let's find Aeris, Red, and Barret then go kick some SOLDIER ass. No offence Cloud and Zack."

x-x-x

There is a strong evil presence on the boat. I can feel it. It makes my heart race and my skin crawl. I start looking for someone. I find Red fairly easily. "Red we need to find everyone. Something is on this boat." He nods at me. "Ok, but I can't walk like this." I shrug slightly. "I don't see any guards and if this is what I think it is, then it won't matter if we get caught." We change back into our regular clothes. Now we need to find Cloud, he is our hero after all. So I do the most natural thing. Scream. "CLOUD!"

x-x-x

"Don't worry, I wasn't a SOLDIER. Zack was though. Now we have to..." I'm cut off by a bloodcurdling scream. "CLOUD!" My blood runs cold. Aeris! We all rush towards the sound. We see Barret rushing there too. When we get up on the upper part of the lower deck we see Aeris is just fine. "There you are, Cloud. I feel something strong on the boat! I think it's Sephiroth!" I laugh a little. "A bit late, Aeris, but thank you." She blushes and giggles a bit. "Oh, ok. Sorry for scaring you all with my scream." I smile and turn to everyone. "Ok we need to move down to the engine room. Now." We all run towards the stairs. My heart is pounding out of my chest. Sephiroth... Not what I needed right this moment. We race down the stairs and then into the engine room. There he is. I hope I can do this. Zack looks a little frightened and Tifa too. Time to be the hero.

"Sephiroth!" He turns to me. "Cloud. How good to see you. You've grown since our last meeting. Tell me, kill anymore superior officers? Or was I the lucky one?" I narrow my eyes and I see Zack open his mouth to retort, but I hold up a hand. "No. I left SOLDIER after Nibelheim and Zack did too. So yes, you were the lucky one. And I will kill you again too." He smiles a dark smile. "Ah so I see, little brother. Do you think I would ever let you kill me? You got lucky once, but never again. Besides, I have a feeling you may join me in time." I feel very cold suddenly. My dream comes rushing back. My eyes widen and my breath picks up. "You his brother, Spiky??" I don't respond to Barret but I vaguely hear Zack say no. All I see is Sephiroth now. "I must take my leave. But don't worry, little brother, we will meet again. Until then I leave you to play with mother." I see him disappear, leaving a monster in his place. My vision bleeds red. All I remember after that is rushing at the monster in blind rage. I didn't care if it was human, beast, creature, or anything else, I just knew I needed to kill it and fast. Damn you Sephiroth, I am not like you!


	23. Rightful Revenge

**Cracked Visage**

**Rightful Revenge**

It looks like we are finally nearing Costa del Sol. The fight in the belly of my ship was quite interesting. So Sephiroth refers to other people with Jenova cells as his brothers. I suppose that makes me his brother as well. Jenova cells, strain Rufus. My body mutated the cells like Sephiroth's did. Cloud has the S strain and from the records Zack has strain R. What Hojo saw as a success in Zack, was in fact a complete and utter failure. His body took the cells alright, but he didn't receive any of the affects. Cloud's body adjusting to the cells caused his immune system to weaken, and already being mako sensitive, he developed mako poisoning. The mako poisoning was seen by Hojo as a sign of failure, when in fact it was a sign of success. What an incompetent fool. My strain can only be passed to people exactly the same as me genetically. In other words, no one. There is only one person who received my cells and got the benefits, without being the same genetically, and that is the thing that tipped me off to the fact that he was special. Reno Sinclair. The Ifrit Materia changed the cells very minutely so that they could be absorbed and put to use. Sephiroth's strain is easier to pass along, but the cells must be injected into a mother while she is pregnant. Hojo was not part of Project X. Project Xtiana. Xtiana Strife was injected with Jenova cells, strain S, when pregnant with a daughter. The little girl, Ariae Sora Strife, was stillborn, yet the cells flourished in Xtiana without any detection. No one thought to check her after the birth to see if any Jenova cells remained. Years later when she had a son, Cloud Arei Strife, she passed on the cells. The cells were dormant until mako was introduced, being dormant for so long made them resistant to mako assimilation, causing Cloud to have the same symptoms as a mako sensitive. Later when Hojo introduced fresh S cells and mako together, his body rebelled again causing an extreme case of mako poisoning and forcing Cloud into a comatose state. I have studied the subject profusely. I have perused book after book. All to understand the extent of my ability. Apparently... I have an ability that will definitely save my life someday. Looks like we are docking at last.

x-x-x

I'm glad ta get off this fuckin' boat. Ryuu has thrown up everything but the kitchen sink, yo. That lil'fun with Heidegger was nice. He is officially mute and castrated. I made sure to do the castration first so I could savor the screams. I let myself shift over to my bloodlustful side. It was thrillin', yo. But of course it just made Ryuu throw up more when I came out of the room covered in blood. Rufus has a little work ta do before we got our date-thingy. Time ta deal with some ShinRa business then get busy with the ShinRa, yo.

x-x-x

As soon as I killed the creature my vision cleared and my body calmed. Maybe it has something to do with the creature itself. Maybe it is made of something that makes me freak out... None the less, the rest of AVALANCHE is too scared to look at me. Zack looks to be at the point of tears, which in turn makes me burst out in tears myself. He rushes forward and wraps his arms around me securely. "Sweetie, are you ok? Talk to me, Cloud!" I sob loudly. "Do you hate me?" He looks shocked beyond words at my question. "Never! I would never hate you, Cloud. I love you, and only you. Sephiroth was taunting you, don't listen to a thing he says." I want to believe him, but I can't. "But I he said the same thing he did in my dream. He called me his brother and said I'd join him eventually. And with the way I killed that monster in blind anger and rage, I have to wonder is he right? Am I just like him? Will I lose my mind too and join him?" Zack's face is firm and pulls my chin up so he can stare into my eyes. "Cloud, you are not like him nor will you ever be. You are perfectly sane. Besides, let's say you did lose your mind, I'd follow you till the end of time. If you go crazy and join Sephiroth, I'll follow. But you aren't so it doesn't matter." I choke on my sobs and I pull him into a fierce and desperate kiss. "Gaia, I love you Zack." His smile send waves of comfort through me. "I know, my love. I know." I feel much better, and yet something is missing. I hear someone walking forward. "Zack can I sit with Cloud for a moment." Aeris? What is she doing? Zack nods and stands up, backing up a little. Aeris sits down with me and puts her hand on my cheek. "Cloud, don't ever lose sight of yourself. I realize that there are some similarities, but always remember you are Gaia's hero. We both know this. Never forget or you will become like him. Stay sane for me and for Zack. And most of all for Gaia." I nod at her only to realize she never spoke. I smile at her and pull her into a hug. Everyone but Zack looks dumbfounded. Zack has a knowing smile on his face.

x-x-x

Great, now Tseng knows about that one-night stand with Reno dammit. He said he didn't care after I explained the circumstances, and he told me that he never thought I was a slut. He says we are still on for our date at about 1800 hours. Thank Shiva for him being the understanding type, but now there will be no after dinner "fun" or I really will look like a slut. At least my dress looks amazing... Why in Gaia is Heidegger walking funny? "Heidegger, you alright?" He turns to me. Wow that's a nasty scar... His lips are moving but there is no sound. Looks like someone finally gave him what he deserved. I laugh long and hard as he waddles away.

x-x-x

"Let's head down to the beach guys! I haven't been here since I was in SOLDIER!" The AVALANCHE crew grumbles affirmatives and I grab Cloud's hand and make a mad dash for the beach. I drag him all the way into the water, tossing off clothes on the way to the ocean. Cloud looks embarrassed but follows my lead. I see Aeris picking up our shirts and pants while Barret grabs our swords. I pull Cloud into my arms. We are floating in the middle of the ocean. He has a cute blush dusting his cheeks. I laugh softly and kiss each of his cheeks until the blush subsides. "So, did Aeris do the mind-talking-thingy?" He looks at me shocked but nods. "I won't ask you what she said. It's a private conversation I gathered." He nods again and I kiss him chastely on the lips. Cloud, oddly enough, is the one to deepen it. I've noticed a major change in his kissing. It has become dominant and forceful... Sort of like Sephiroth's, but I'd never tell him that. He doesn't even know that me and Seph had the "friends with benefits" thing going on during long missions, and he doesn't ever need to know either. I can see Hojo on the beach. I don't tell Cloud yet. I want to enjoy a few more minutes alone with Cloud and I notice Rufus approaching him anyway. I don't really understand what Rufus wants with him after ordering us to kill him, but I don't really care. Cloud moves to my collarbone. I audibly gasp and my hip buck forward unconsciously. My collarbone is a place I rarely have Cloud suck on, since it always makes me aroused. Cloud and I have never had sex, but I can sense that our celibacy streak is about to end if Cloud's pent up sexual frustration grows anymore. And honestly I won't complain, I've been on "hold" for over seven years since I met Cloud.

x-x-x

"Hojo." The scrawny man looks to me. "Ah specimen R, how nice to see you." How idiotic of him. "Mr. ShinRa to you now." The man looks unimpressed. "I don't work for you anymore. Now what is it you want?" I sneer at him. "Working for me or not, you owe me respect as a man of higher status than you. But aside from that, I wanted to offer you some interesting information." I hand him the papers on the Project X. There is no purpose for this, except making a fool of him before Zack and Cloud kill him. The man browses through them with a shocked expression. "Perhaps, Professor Hojo, you will do appropriate research on your specimens before you blindly inject them with Jenova cells. If you had injected Cloud with my strain he would have died. The two strains do not mix well if you recall. And Zack's ability to absorb my strain does not equate to him being the 'success'. Reviewing your papers, it seems you almost destroyed the true 'success' because he hindered Zack's progress. I just wanted to be the one to personally tell you that you sir are a complete imbecile. Good bye." I leave without a word or looking back after snatching the papers back. He is all yours now boys.

x-x-x

"Cloud... Stop babe. We need to go kill Hojo. He is sitting on the beach." Cloud groans in disappointment but pulls away. We start swimming back to shore. We both have a malicious gleam in out eye. "Hey guys. Your clothes are right here." I nod at Tifa and start pulling on my shirt. Cloud does the same. "What's wrong guys?" I look to Biggs. He has lightened up a little over the last day or so. "Me and Cloud have something of extreme importance to take care of. We need to do this alone because no one here has the stomach to watch what we are about to do." Barret snorts. "If ya'll are gonna have sex, just say so." I laugh a little, but the sound is bitter. "No, I wish. We are going to kill Hojo." Aeris gasped. "Is he here?" I nod solemnly. "Yeah just down the beach. Me and Cloud have to do this guys, it's important for us to finally put the memories of what he did to us in the labs to rest." Everyone looks confused. "What labs?" I smack my forehead with my hand. "Don't worry about it, we will explain later. But go to the inn and get settled, rent me and Cloud a room too. We'll be back later." Everyone nods but Aeris looks worried. "Be careful. And don't take joy in hurting people. Even someone as twisted as Hojo, or you will lose yourself to darkness." I nod at her and Cloud does the same. We both take the plea to heart, she is right after all, but we need to do this if not for us then for our orders. The more I'm thinking about it, I'd like a stable life again. We start walking down the beach towards Hojo. The man is rubbing his temples and has his eyes closed. "Move ladies." The girls go scampering off leaving us with Hojo. "Hello Hojo." The man looks annoyed. "Go away. If you are just here to rub Specimen' R's research in my face then get out."

Cloud laughs a very uncharacteristic cruel laugh. "Oh no, _Professor._ We are here for something much worse." Cloud grabs Hojo by his shirt and smashes his fist into his already crooked face. The man is knocked unconscious and Cloud throws him over his shoulder. We head up to the town and Cloud drags him inside a building. "We need to use your basement." I look to who he is talking to and am shocked to see a smug looking Rufus. How the hell did Cloud know this was Rufus' house!? I push that aside and follow Cloud to the basement. Cloud throws him down in a chair and grabs a pair of pliers that happened to be sitting on the desk. "Hey Cloud, how did you know this was Rufus' home?" He shrugs. "I didn't I had plans to use the basement no matter who lived here." I stare at him for a moment and choose to drop the issue. I pick up another pair of pliers. Time for the show.


	24. Hopeless Romance

**Cracked Visage**

**Hopeless Romance**

Nervous is a feeling that I very rarely have to deal with. Yet as I approach Elena's hotel room I am overcome with it. I suppose when Verdot said I was a hopeless romantic he was right. I have a bouquet of Easter lilies for her and a necklace... The necklace is quite expensive, it is dark blue sapphires. I swallow with nervousness and raise a hand to knock at the door. Before I can even do so, the door flies open revealing Elena in what I must say is the most beautiful dress in creation. My mouth hangs open in rapture of her beauty. Her hair is done up in an intricate up-do. Her eyes are brought out by dark eyeliner and mascara. Her cheeks sport just a tinge of blush. She is wearing dangling sapphire earrings and I thank every thing I can think of that I chose the sapphire necklace instead of the rubies. Her dress is navy blue, yet it shimmers, it looks like silk and has a very low back and she is wearing long navy gloves. She is gorgeous. "Tseng, close your mouth or your tongue is going to fall out." I close my mouth like she says but I continue to stare. I want to drop to my knee and propose right this minute. "I uhh... bought you flowers." She smiles and takes the bouquet out of my hands, inhaling the flower's sweet aroma. "Oh Tseng, lilies are my favorite! You are so sweet!" She walks back inside her temporary home and gestures for me to follow. I walk in and see her putting the flowers in a small vase of water. Here is my chance! I take out the necklace and sneak behind her with my perfected Turk stealth. I lift up the necklace and put it around her neck. She jumps slightly from surprise, but says nothing as I clasp the jewelry. She looks up into the mirror in front of her and her eyes are sparkling with tears. I feel pride overwhelm me as she touches the necklace with her gloved hand and smiles brightly. "Tseng, this is so amazing. I... don't know what to say. It's spectacular."

I press a finger to her lips. She stops talking for a moment and looks at me confused. I lean in tilting my head slowly. She responds by leaning closer. I snake my arms around her slim waist and our lips meet tenderly. She breathes out very softly and I am enveloped in her fantastic scent. She smells like apples and spring flowers. She parts her lips slightly and I do the same, slightly licking her lips. She even tastes like apples. I have a sudden craving for the sweet fruit... When we pull apart she looks breathless and the blush on her cheeks is slightly darker. "Tseng.. that was... wow." I smile and motion towards the door. "We, my sweet, have dinner reservations." She smiles and nods. "Let's go then." As we walk out of the room, I turn to the mirror and look at Emina. "Sorry, but I think I may have fallen in love again. And it seems this time, it's mutual." She frowns and narrows her eyes. I wink at her and close the door.

x-x-x

Wow. Just wow. Tseng is the most amazing man I have ever met. We rode in a Costa del Sol limo to the restaurant. Qutei is the name of the place, the best Wutain food on the continent. The name means "Tradition" in Wutainese, and that is their motto. The food is very authentic and the menu is only in Wutainese. I've taken basic conversational courses in Wutainese, but Tseng had to point out some things. I ordered the Revoai, which is cockatolis meat that is rolled in traditional spices and cooked over flames after being soaked in Wutain sake. It was positively delicious. Tseng had the Pekqui. It's a the meat of a snake of some sort soaked in a sake and broth mixture, then boiled in the mixture with noodles until tender and last served with a sauce made of the left over mixture and more sake. Wutain sake, Tseng told me, is the key ingredient to all traditional Wutain food. He gave me a bite and I loved it. The dishes we huge so neither of us finished, we had the rest wrapped up. Tseng specifically told the waiter to wrap a portion of his with mine so I could have a little of both. I offered to do the same, but he declined.

After dinner, Tseng told the driver to take us to the beach. When we arrived the beach guard informed us that the beach was closed after dark. I was ready to give up sadly, but with one flash of his badge we were given access. I was overjoyed as we made our way down to the waves. I took off my high heels and held up my dress as I let my feet get wet. He watched me with a dopey smile on his face. I started to shiver from the cold and he gave me his jacket. I smiled and snuggled into the peppermint and vanilla smelling material. Tseng smelled amazing. I didn't stop shivering, now I was pretending, and he got worried. I told him the jacket helped, but I was still cold. He came behind me and wrapped his arms around my shoulders. I stopped shivering and leaned into his touch. "Are you happy?" I nod softly resting my head on his chest. "I am. I don't think I've ever been so happy." I look up at him shocked. I don't want to bring her up, but at the moment I had to know. "What about Emina?" He smiled a little and looked down at me. "She was ok, but you know, I think I want someone to love me back. She never did and never would." I gasp slightly. "You could love me?" His smile widened and I caught the silent message. He already did. Just I loved him. "Tseng, will you promise me that someday we will have a baby?" He looked thrown off guard by my question, then a wide smile spread over his face. "As long as you promise me someday you'll be my wife." I nod softly and lean in. Just before our lips meet we whisper, "I promise."

x-x-x

It is safe to say that no one wanted to screw with me or Zack after we got to the inn. We were both covered head to toe in blood. I actually started to enjoy torturing Hojo, but Aeris' words came back in time to stop me. We killed him though, after getting as much information possible. Sephiroth is headed to Mt. Corel. And now I know why Sephiroth called me brother... We share the same cells. Cells of his "mother", Jenova. Zack was confused as to why Sephiroth called me brother then and didn't even acknowledge that Zack was in the room. Zack is supposed to have Jenova cells too. Hojo started ranting for a moment about "How could he have not seen?" and "It's completely obvious now. Damn R for being right.". Neither me or Zack bothered to ask who "R" was. Honestly we didn't care. Just before we killed him Rufus came down the stairs. He looked at all of us drenched in blood. He smiled and took a sip of what appeared to be red wine. For the first time, he was not wearing his white suit, but simply white pants and a black turtleneck. He looked attractive in the suit, but out of it, and holding red wine, he looked very... I guess the word would be sexy. I didn't like it, I only like being turned-on by Zack. Zack has a cute and handsome face and body, Rufus has a edgy and sexy look to him. I would never try anything but I still was unable to ignore his natural magnetism. I just tuned him out like Zack did and finished the job. Hojo is unrecognizable. When we had finished Rufus clapped slightly with his trademark smirk. Zack rolled his eyes and we both left quickly. We have to go try and convince AVALANCHE that we are going to stay with them again. We arrived at the inn in the late afternoon. We passed Tseng and Elena coming out of the inn building dressed nicely and Zack shot Tseng a thumbs-up as we passed. I actually heard Tseng chuckle. We walked to our room and were seen by everyone as they were sitting in one room with the door open. Nobody stopped us. We got to our room a took a shower. It was quick and meant solely to get clean.

We walked back to the room where everyone was talking. They fell silent when we entered. "Are you guys ok?" I smile slightly and nod at Aeris. She looks a little worried, but says nothing. "Sooooooo... We gonna get the story about the labs?" I sigh and Zack does the same, but nods at Biggs. "Zack can you tell the story?" We both take a seat on the floor with Red and Tifa. "Well after we, more like Cloud, killed Sephiroth we were badly injured. Cloud had even been impaled on Masamune, the longest Katana on Gaia, you saw it sticking out of President ShinRa's back." Everyone gasped. "Why didn't you tell us that was his sword?!" I rolled my eyes. They should have known themselves or at least Tifa. Zack shook his head a little before continuing. "Because we didn't think it mattered, we thought he was dead. But none the less, me and Cloud were taken by Hojo as specimens for research since it was assumed we would not survive. We were tortured "for science" and injected with mako and J cells. He injected us both with Jenova cells, strain S. Strain Sephiroth." Aeris' worry increased visibly. "Not exactly." We all jump and turn towards the door where the bald Turk Rude is standing. We all get on guard, me and Zack faking it. "Calm down. The President wanted me to deliver these records. He thought it was only fair since you killed Hojo and now would never get the true story." I took the liberty to feign a growl. "We didn't kill Hojo for _ShinRa_!" Rude smirked and set down the papers. "Read them. You just might learn something about yourself." I look at him with distrust as he walks away. I pick up the papers. The top packet is titled "Project X - Ariae S. Strife." I feel my blood run cold. Strife? The date is for several years before my birth and the papers are ShinRa research. "What is it Cloud?" I sit back down slowly and pass the papers to Zack. He takes a look at them and his hands start to shake.

"Project X. Subject - Xtiana Lux Strife." I feel the tears overflowing from my eyes. "That's my mom's name.," I whisper. "The subject was injected with J cells, strain S, prenatally. The objective was to give the child the traits of Sephiroth, the child of Hojo and Lucrecia, the projected perfect SOLDIER. The subject gave birth on January 24, the child was stillborn. The girl was named Ariae Sora Strife. The autopsy reveled that the child did inherit Sephiroth's abilities. When asked to repeat the experiment Xtiana declined. She was ordered to be terminated for insubordination, but she escaped. Her location is unknown at this time. The project is deemed a failure." I shook with sobs. "So I am like him? I was created in a lab?!" Zack looked horrified and pulled me into his arms. "No Cloud! Look this was before you were born and she left. You were born because she wanted a baby. Not a science experiment." How could this be true? Not even Zack's words of comfort calm me now.


	25. Asinine Denial

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**I've been trying to keep my updates coming quickly so I can begin the sequel soon. I've been toying with the idea of doing a sequel for the first year after the first game, then a sequel for that tracking the second year, then the Advent Children part. It really depends on how much time I have on my hands. This fic is scheduled to end at chapter 15, but that is far from the end of the story. People can check out my oneshot: "Failure" for how Ryuu and Reno met. I may turn that into a seperate story if people request it.**

**This chapter has a lot of new information. It is very important too. So read the parts near the end with care!**** Anyone can as me a question and I will do my very best to answer it. Uhh... For the Heidegger part... Well I hate him so... You can imagine why I chose to do this to him. Hojo too. Oh yeah, and all the Wutainese words and dishes are MADE UP. It is all my creation! So I don't confuse anyone.**

**Dear Dicequeen****: I am so happy that you have been reading my story and giving me feedback! I thank you very much. I do realize most of my male characters are either gay or bisexual. I am a total yaoi fangirl so it's predictable for me. Emina was meant to be a sort of bitchy character. She is sort of a trial in Tseng and Elena's relationship. I absolutely do not like her. I have no hard feelings against her character in Before Crisis, but looking at the way I've put her into my story she is meant to be a "bad guy" so to speak. I personally felt bad for Ryuu so he gets a break in chapter 9, even though I wasn't planning one. :)! As for Rufus... well he is hard to figure out even for me. But he went through a lot as a child, some of which is explained in this chapter. More will be explained later too. So until my next update, thank you again for reviewing! **

**Thank you to Itachi's Girl92 and Starlight-Dagger too!! **

**ENJOY!**

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Cracked Visage

**Asinine Denial**

Tifa flipped through the papers. "Hey what's this? Project R. Subject - Rufus ShinRa. The subject was injected with Jenova cells at age four. The cells became mutated and changed. The new cells were named Jenova cells, strain R. The cells cannot be passed on to anyone but the subject. The other subjects injected with strain R died in a matter of hours or days. The subject R received enhanced vision, strength, speed, senses, etc. He is deemed a success. Then this other one. Project F. Subject - Felicia Saina Belude." Biggs jumped up and snatched the papers from Tifa. "Hey Biggs! You could have cut me." He is shaking terribly. Tifa snorts and moves on to the next ones. "Project RE. Subject - Reno Sinclair. The subject naturally absorbed a summons materia, Ifrit, into his body. The subject received enhancements akin to subject R and S. When accidentally injected with Jenova cells, strain R, the subject was the first and only to absorb the cells and mutate them slightly till his body received even higher enhancements. He is deemed a success like R. Next is, Project SB. Subject - Sears Baron." Biggs also snatched those papers. Tifa huffed. "The last ones are different. They appear to be Hojo's personal research. Specimen Z and Specimen C. I guess that's you guys. Specimen Z was injected with Jenova cells, strain R... I thought you just said you were injected with S?" Zack looked confused. "I thought I was. That's what Hojo was always raving about." Tifa looked back to the papers.

"Z absorbed the R strain successfully and made a full recovery. No enhancements are seen as of yet, but they are expected to be numerous. Specimen C was injected with Jenova cells, strain S. C did not receive the cells correctly. His body lost the ability to handle mako exposure. He developed severe mako poisoning and weakened day by day. He is expected to die from the poisoning. This may be a benefit because his screams seem to trigger Z to struggle and strengthen before weakening. C is a male of diminutive stature, I should have injected him with R's cells too. They do share similar physical characteristics. It is too late for that now. The boy will not live much longer. Z is doing excellent, he strengthens as the days pass. That's the end of them... Oh wait, there is one more. Hmm... it looks like Rufus ShinRa did some research of his own... According to the research presented to me, and personal experiences, I realize that Hojo was very much mistaken. Zackary Fair did not absorb my cells the way they are supposed to be. I believe the high concentration of mako killed the cells before they could settle in the body and kill him, but he has not received any enhancements as Reno and I did. As for Cloud Strife, looking at the previous experiments on his mother, it appears that no one checked to see if Xtiana had cells still inside her body after her daughter was born. She obviously did, and they were passed on to Cloud when he was born. Later, when attempting to join SOLDIER, Cloud was turned away for having the characteristics of a mako sensitive. In fact, it was the dormant S cells, which do not react well to mako after being dormant for a long period of time, in Cloud's case fifteen years. When later, under Hojo, he was injected with a S cell and mako fusion his body had to work very hard to assimilate the solutions. His immune system was weakened making him fall victim to mako poisoning and his comatose state was brought on by his body working to hard for him to have the energy to move. He did receive the complete benefits of the S cells, so he was the success. Hojo completely mistook the signs. So, though you did not do this for me, I thank you for killing such an incompetent idiot. I've wanted to do so since I was four."

x-x-x

"Sir?" I smirk slightly at the voice. "Come in Reno." I hear the door open completely then shut a moment later. I tilt my head to side slightly as he slides onto the couch behind me and puts his head in the crook of my neck while wrapping his arms around my waist. "Tie up those annoying loose ends?" He snickers and starts sucking my neck. "All done. I'ma single man again." I raise my eyebrow, setting down my wine and turning to face him. "Is that so?" He smiles and catches my lips in a quick kiss. I lean backward pulling him down on me as I close the laptop I was working on. I pull away slightly. "Actually, you aren't single. Cause I just claimed you." Reno gave me a devious smirk. "Does that mean I get ta claim ya too, Boss?" That damn smirk of his is making me feel quite weak in the knees, standing or not. "Yes I suppose so." The smirk widens into a full smile. Gaia... "Good." From that moment my mouth was cut off by a redhead on a mission. Honestly, who was I to complain?

x-x-x

So they're like me and Elfé? They were experimented on too? Poor guys. "I don't understand any of this shi'. What the fuck does this mean, Spiky? You human right?" Cloud flinched at the comment. I unconsciously growled. "He's as human as me, you, and every other human on Gaia." Everyone looked at me from the venom in my voice. "Biggs? What do those papers say?" I close my eyes and restrain the urge to yell at Aeris, she doesn't deserve it. "They explain what was done to me and the woman I loved and the former leader of AVALANCHE, Elfé." Everyone gasped softly. I suppose it's time to tell my story. "My name is Sears Baron, I was an original member of AVALANCHE and the second in command to Elfé. She was the daughter of the head Turk, Verdot Belude. When she was a baby, Kalm was razed to the ground on accident, her mother perished but she was saved by the founder of AVALANCHE, Velion. He brought her to Midgar and she and I grew up together. Later when Velion died, she took over AVALANCHE. We had another man, Fuhito. He was our scientist and created our warriors, the Ravens. We used to be a lot more brutal with our tactics, lots of innocents were killed. I loved Elfé. She had the ancient Zirconaide Materia inside her. It slowly killed her. I have a Revive Materia inside me which, as you can recall from the Sector 7 plate incident, prevents me from dying. It sucks. Elfé was killed when Fuhito released the Zirconaide, I tried to save her by sacrificing myself but I couldn't. So now she is dead and I am stuck here on Gaia. I even defected from AVALANCHE and worked with the Turks to try and save her, but nothing worked. Rufus ShinRa was our benefactor. He wanted us to kill his father. We got closer than any other assassin he'd hired, we shot him, but he survived and Rufus was caught. The Turks broke from ShinRa for awhile and became a stand-alone group. They went back eventually after Verdot found out that Elfé was killed and he committed suicide. So if Cloud and Zack are not considered human then neither are me and Elfé. And if you say Elfé wasn't human then I'll kill you myself." I snarled the last part and everyone fell silent. I hated when people made comments on whether or not we were human. Of course we are human. Why wouldn't we be?

Cloud looked up at me with grateful eyes. "Thank you, Sears." I nod in his direction. I don't trust that they are really for AVALANCHE, but thinking about the things I once did, I feel that I will just have to let it slide. Something big is brewing and he looks like our best chance for a hero. "So we call you Sears now?" I nod at Tifa. "I'm sorry for deceiving you but I couldn't risk people knowing I'm still alive." Everyone looks shocked, but I can't blame them, it's a lot to take in. "Let's rest till tomorrow morning then head out for Mt. Corel. I'm assuming you and Zack will be accompanying us, Cloud? After all you have a score to settle with Sephiroth right?" He smiles softly and nods. "Yeah." We all head to our rooms to rest for the night. I fell better with people knowing. Maybe I can begin to heal, Elfé, all I needed was to let go of my asinine denials.

x-x-x

Me an' Rufus are sprawled out on the bed. Damn that was a good fuck, yo... Nah... I think it was maybe even makin' love. I never took Rufus for the post-sex cuddling type, but here 'e is curled up in my arms sleepin' soundly. His blonde hair is slightly damp and stuck ta his forehead. I think this is the most disorganized I have ever seen him. I've watched him get a blow job from one of his secretaries once... I was the only guard who would still guard him during this. He held a gun to the poor doll's head to "ensure she does her job correctly". Not what he said ta me an hour ago, yo. Rufus and I are a couple now I guess. Damn... I'm datin' a ShinRa, yo. I've been pettin' Rufus' hair since he fell asleep. He hates when people touch it, including Tseng, but when he is asleep I got all the access I want. It's so silky and fine. I have no idea why I let him top me... I've never really liked it, but this time I was moanin' like a whore. Rufus ain't small in any regard. We are about the same in length, he is a half an inch shorter, but he's a little wider. I think I liked the kisses the best. He can kiss very passionately, yo. I have a feeling that I've been an object of his lust for awhile... But that old man of his kept him from tryin' anythin'. I'm hoping that he can get me to love again. I really want to love... It would make me feel more human. He needs ta be loved too. We need each other and I'm glad I can be there for him. I may not look like I take my job seriously, but I'd lay my life down for this kid. As long as I am alive, nothing will ever hurt him again. I couldn't protect him from his father because I found out too late. I only started to look into his past after he ordered me to kill Cissnei. It opened my eyes a lot. I didn't know he was the "R" in the "Jenova cells, Strain R" which are inside me and keep me sane. I smile softly down at the little dark angel in my arms. I press a small kiss to his forehead and whisper the only words running through my mind. "Save me."


	26. Obvious Stress

**Cracked Visage**

**Obvious Stress**

We left Costa del Sol early this morning. We need to get to Mt. Corel before the sun sets. Everyone is a little groggy except me and Zack. We have our bodies wired to the military schedule. Aeris is pretty perky too. She says the mornings are the most beautiful time to look at the flowers, because they are happy to greet the sun and dry off the dew on their petals. We have to hike through this annoying forest. These damn frogs are getting annoying though. Sears and Barret were turned into frogs an hour ago. It was kind of funny, but then Aeris had to kiss them to turn them back to normal... She wasn't thrilled. "Hey! Where did my Restore Materia go?! Oh no I hope I haven't lost it, it was mastered." I swing around to look at Aeris. "Are you sure it's missing?" She nods. "I'm missing a Fire Materia too!" Everyone starts checking their weapons and armlets for their Materia and everyone is missing one or two except me, Zack, and Barret... The three dangerous looking ones... My eyes narrow and my mako senses start scoping out the area. There! I pull my sword off my back and pin the thief to a tree by their shirt. I just barely missed flesh, but the Materia thief is caught. A kid? "Let me go you spikey-headed jerk!" I walk forward and pluck our materia of her hands. "Hey! Those are mine you jerk!" Zack looks like he saw a ghost. "What's wrong Zack?" Zack walks up to the little thief and surveys her. "Aren't you that kid that hired me to do your dirty work? Y'know, the one that cried and made me feel guilty? The little punk who tried to stop me in Wutai when me and Angeal were infiltrating the fort?" The kid huffed and looked at Zack. "I knew it was you porcupine head. I remember that you could never find any good treasure! And it's your fault Wutai fell to ShinRa! You killed our people and destroyed my home. I'm too ashamed to even call Wutai my home anymore. No one was strong enough to kill you ShinRa jerks. And don't call me a kid. I'm Yuffie Kisaragi, Ninja Princess. Daughter of Godo, the Lord of Wutai. That makes me the Princess of Wutai, ya jerk." Princess? Yeah right. I snort at her. "Sure, a princess of Wutai would really need to steal Materia." She frowns at me with a serious face that doesn't look right on her. "Of course I do. There is no more Materia in Wutai after ShinRa took over."

Zack looks extremely distressed. "I'm sorry..." Everyone looks at Zack while he whispers an apology. "I didn't mean to ruin your life. I was just following orders... I'm not with ShinRa anymore. Forgive me." Yuffie looks shocked. "Nah, don't worry bout it porcupine head, I'm gonna save Wutai anyway. I was just annoyed. Sorry for taking your Materia, but blondie is still a jerk for pinning me to a tree.." I frown and wrinkle my nose. "Hey! You look like a strong bunch of guys! Why don't you let me come along? You're strong now, but you'll be amazing with a ninja princess with you!" I roll my eyes and pull the sword of the tree, freeing her. She does a quick flip and lands correctly on her feet. "Alright! Let's go! Uhh... Where are we headed?" I smack my forehead. "Mt. Corel. And Yuffie, try not to be a burden." I nod at Zack and turn to leave. It's going to be a long day...

x-x-x

Wow we slept late... I roll over and face Tseng. Gaia he is good in bed... I can't believe I agreed to be his wife last night... I don't regret it, but I am still shocked. He is so beautiful. That hair is silky and flows through my fingers. I think I like him better with his hair down, maybe I can convince him to keep it down more often. "Mmm.." I smile as he slowly stirs. "Hey, babe. Sleepy?" He nods softly looking up at me with half-closed eyes. "Sleep ok?" I press a kiss to his forehead. "With you by my side, I slept amazing." He rolls over on to his back and props himself up on his elbows. I slide over him and straddle his lap. I lay my head on his shoulder and inhale his scent. "That was fantastic... So are we official?" I smile into his neck. "We agree to get married and have kids, of course we're official. I've been tacking Liuo on to the end of my name all morning. You are a lucky that I'm legal or you'd be in trouble Mr. Turk." Elena Liuo... I like it... It's much better than staying Elena Onimi forever. I hear him chuckle slightly. "It doesn't bother you I'm twenty seven when you're eighteen? A nine year difference?" I shake my head. The thought really doesn't bother me at all. "Nope. It just means you can take care of me better. And besides, older men are sexy. Y'know, I couldn't stop planning our wedding even before our first date? I thought I was going insane." I pull back and look him dead in the eyes. His smile is so bright... "I couldn't either. I kept imagining you walking to the alter in a lovely white dress... It would make me the happiest man on Gaia." I kiss him tenderly on the mouth to show him that I agree with his vision. "So do I get a ring?" His smile widens even more and a soft laugh spills from his mouth. He reaches over to the nightstand and pulls out a little black box. I sit up and watch him climb out of bed. He drops to a knee and raises an eyebrow. "Elena Onimi would you do me the honor of being my wife?" Watching him do this all my fears and worries are erased. All my qualms about moving too fast in our relationship are crushed. I know without a doubt that this is the man I want to be with for the rest of my life and even in the Lifestream. Tears well up in my eyes and I smile a joyful smile. "Yes, Tseng Liuo I will be your wife."

x-x-x

Barret is looking pretty nervous. I wonder what's up with him... "Hey Cloudy, what do you think is wrong with Barret?" He shrugs and looks at the large black man. His shoulders are very tense and he is sweating even more than everyone else. It's only the early morning too so it's not too hot yet. "Hey Barret you ok man?" Even Sears noticed Barret's strange mood. "Yo, I'm fine Biggs... Er Sears.. worry bout your own shi'." We're nearing the mako reactor at the top of the mountain. From there it should be fairly easy to get to North Corel. I hope we get stop at Gold Saucer...

x-x-x

Reno is sleeping too late... If he doesn't wake up soon I will have to wake him myself. It's nearly 1000 hours. A Turk shouldn't be sleeping till 10 am, it just isn't right. I've been working on my laptop while Reno cuddled up to my torso. I need a shower, but I really don't want to leave him... Damn him for being so adorable with his untied and messy red hair. I lace my left hand in his hair as my right scrolls down the page. I scratch slightly behind his ear and he purrs... It's a little hidden pleasure of his I discovered this morning. I hear him groan groggily, I close my laptop and look down at him. "Rufus?" I brush his bangs out of his eyes as his looks at me. "Yes, Reno?" He smiles a little and I feel my heart ache at the beauty of it. "Good mornin' lovely. I'm happy not ta wake up alone." I raise an eyebrow at him. "Wake up alone? You expected me to leave?" He shakes his head while sitting up and placing a "good morning" kiss on my cheek. "Nah, I'm just used ta wakin' alone after some one night thing... Ya need a shower?" I nod at him. "Come on then. I'm takin' one then makin' breakfast." I'm quite skeptical of this. "You cook, Reno?" He wrinkles his nose slightly. "Uhh kinda... I can make burnt toast and eggs." I smile and place a kiss on his lips. "I'll be cooking then." I walk to the bathroom, listening to his footsteps behind me. They're barely audible, I suppose that's a skill learned as a field Turk. I was a Turk, but I never worked in the field due to it being too dangerous for the only ShinRa heir to do. We slide into the shower and he settles behind me. I let his arms snake around my waist and pull me back into his chest. I tilt my head backward to let him leave more love bites. I have several on my neck, collarbone, and chest. "Sleep well, love?" I smile for a moment to myself. "Yes Reno I did." I look forward into the shower mirror, I focus on his eyes which are swirling blue. "Good..." He whispers against my flesh. This is about when I give up any hope for getting to work anytime soon.

x-x-x

What in the world could be wrong with Barret? The distress is rolling off him in waves... I can sense it even from the back of the group. I'm worried for him. The planet is scarred here... Something terrible happened in this area. "Cheep." Oh? What was that? "Cheep... Cheep..." I look inside a little crevace and see a nest. "Cheep.. Cheep Cheep." Cockatolis chicks... I smile a little and pet their downy heads. "Cheeeeeep." How adorable. "Rrrraaak!" I look up at their mother who just returned. "It's ok. I wasn't going to hurt your babies. They are very sweet. You must be proud." The grown cockatolis looked at me wearily and nuzzled her babies. I smiled rubbed her head too. I've always been very good with creatures of Gaia. The mother nudges a box towards me. I pick it up and open it. There are ten phoenix downs inside. Oh this will help a lot. "Thank you very much. This will help my friends and I. Take care of your babies!" I turn and continue walking along the track. "Aeris!?" Oh looks like I've fallen a bit behind. "Coming!" I pick up the pace of my walking a little. It looks like we've found the town... Oh dear...

x-x-x

This place is a wasteland... And it seems that they know Barret. "Get out! You're not welcome here!" Damn... This is going to be annoying. "Hey Cloudy." I look at Zack in confusion. "Yeah Zack?" Yuffie is looking around and bouncing like a lunatic. "I don't think they like Barret here... Maybe we should move on to the Gold Saucer. The cable car should be over that way." I nod and motion for everyone to come by us. "We're going to head to Gold Saucer. Let's go." Yuffie squealed. "Oh really?! I love Gold Saucer!!" We make our way to the cable cars and board one. Barret has yet to say anything to explain the towns peoples' actions. I have to wonder what he did to piss them off. "Welcome to Gold Saucer! It's 3,000 Gil for one a day or 30,000 Gil for a lifetime pass!" I pull out 3,000 Gil. "One day, please." She counts the money and waves us inside with a smile. This should be fun. "Let's all have fun today. We need a break from the serious attitudes." Barret huffed. "Fun!? You wanna have fun when we shoul' be lookin' for that guy in the black?! Fine! I'll show'ya fun!" Barret jumped into a slide and took off. "Just let him have sometime to cool off. Everyone else enjoy the day."


	27. Deceiving Amusement

**Cracked Visage**

**Deceiving Amusement**

Sears, Tifa, and Red nodded and jumped into a slide. "Well Aeris, Zack. Where do you want to head?" Zack glowed with joy. "Wonder Square!" I laugh and jump down the slide for Wonder Square. "Come one, come all! Get a free fortune! I can see your future with my magical Mog!" Aeris grabbed our hands and dragged us to this talking... cat? "Tell us our fortunes!" The cat grinned at us. "Alright, lassy!" The mog opened its mouth and spit out a fortune. "You will meet the girl of your dreams tomorrow! Oh... That's not right! Give me another chance!" The mog spits out another fortune. "The thing you seek is always planning... The wrath of Gaia will be felt soon!" Well that's interesting... "Come on guys let's go, this guy is a fake." The cat waves his hands/paws quickly. "No, no, no! I'm not a fake! And besides I want to come with you! So that's that." Oh Gaia please not another one. "Aeris can you handle the cat? I want to go on a date with Cloudy-kins." Aeris nods while I blush to my roots. "Oh, so you're a couple then? Want me to tell you if you will have children?" I growl at the cat. "We're both male and you can't tell futures for shit. Now come'on Zack, let's go."

x-x-x

I groan loudly. My body is so sore. I swear that we will never have sex in the shower again if he can't be a little gentler. Damn I didn't expect him to be so rough when he was "insane", but I can barely move. "Ya ok, Ruf? I'm sorry... Shit this is why I didn't want to risk this..." I roll my eyes at him. "I'm fine Reno. If you think this is the worst I've been through then you're sadly mistaken. I'm just slightly sore." I'm lifted into his arms and he carries me to the bedroom. "Here ya go, Rufus. Just stay in bed for awhile, ok?" I frown and wrinkle my nose. "I have work to do." Reno snorts and pulls on his pants. "Work can wait. I'm gonna make us breakfast. I know I ain't the best cook, but I'll try. If I have'ta then I'll teach myself, yo." I allow myself to give him a rare smile. "You haven't said that in awhile. Yo, that is." Reno shrugged. "I don't know why. But whatever. Stay in bed. Or I'll have ta go 'momma Turk' on ya." I arch my eyebrow. "Momma Turk? You do know I will never forget you said that right?" He sticks out his tongue and leaves the room. I oull out my laptop and switch over to the surveillance. I watch Reno walk over to the kitchen. This will most likely not end well.

x-x-x

Now, where are those eggs... Ah ha! And there's the pan... This shouldn't be too hard... I pick up a cookbook from the counter and flip through it. "French toast? Toast and eggs together... The two things I can make! Rufus would probably like this." I crack the egg into a bowl and use a fork to get out the little shell pieces. I never really cared if shell ended up in my eggs before, but this is for Rufus, I have to show him that I can be a good lover. I added cinnamon like the book said an' whipped it all together. The eggs looked frothy and white like the book depicted. I soaked three pieces of toast in the mixture for a few minutes while the stove heated up. I buttered the pan and licked my lips, this was gonna be good. I cracked four more eggs into a pan and scrambled them. On the back burner I had bacon and sausage cooking. I carefully placed the French toast on the front pan and sprinkled a little more cinnamon them. I had everything cooking now. I put my full attention into this meal, it was for Rufus after all. The bacon and sausage were done first so I set them on a plate that I put on a tray to carry to Rufus. It's kinda my fault he's all stuck in bed anyway... I flipped over the french toast before it burned. The eggs were done so I put them next to the bacon. When the French toast was done I set them on a separate plate on the tray and grabbed some syrup from the fridge and the jug of OJ. I poured a glass of OJ, before placing the jug back in the fridge. Done, yo! The bacon was a little crispy, and the toast was slightly dark on one side, but it was the best I've ever done! I gulped when a thought entered my mind... I'm clumsy in the mornins... And I don't wanna drop this... I move into the living room and clear a path to Rufus' bedroom. Back in the kitchen I pick up the tray and slowly walk to his room. I stop outside of the door and set the tray on the table. Fruit! Dammit! I race back to the kitchen and grab two bananas. I peel them and slice them quickly onto a small plate before heading over to the tray. I see Dark Nation sniffing the food and I bat him away. I set down the bananas and open the door. I pick up the tray and walk over to Rufus who is watching me with a curious expression.

"Here's yer breakfast, babe!" I set the tray on the bed and curl up next to him. "Like it?" He smiled and kissed me on the forehead, nose, and lips. "You did amazing Reno." I could feel joy just coming off me in tidal waves. I puffed out my chest, very proud of myself. Gaia he's makin' me a softy! I've never wanted ta take care of anyone besides myself before and now I do. He makes me happy ta be happy. "Share with me?" I smile and pick up some bacon lickin' all the way up it before biting off a piece. Rufus moan softly and took a bite of the french toast. I stared expectantly. "So?" Rufus chewed slowly with no expression. He leans in close and I lean forward. "It was exquisite Reno." I smile happily and take a bite for myself. Yum! I should learn ta cook more often!

x-x-x

"It looks like Rufus is busy with Reno, so we are free to stay home or go out." Elena looks at me with a smile. "Wanna plan our wedding out?" I walk over to my beautiful fiancée and smile. "Didn't we do that an hour ago?" Truthfully, I'd be happy planning until the day itself. "Yeah, but I want to do it again." I pick up her hand and kiss the ring. "Let's go look at wedding dresses then." She gasped and glowed. "Really Tseng!?" I nod and pull on my jacket. Elena grabs me and kisses me fiercely. I respond quickly and wrap my hand around her waist. Shiva has blessed me with this woman. Elena pulls away and gets dressed. We head to Costa del Solian Bridals. Costa del Sol is a wedding hotspot so the store is huge. "Hello, may I help you?" Elena looks at the woman. "Actually you might be able to. Me and my… fiancé want to look at some dresses. We were hoping for a winter wedding." The woman looks confused. "Winter wedding? Most people look for spring or summer weddings here." Elena shakes her head. "We aren't planning to be married in Costa del Sol. Our job means we will most likely have to have the wedding in Junon or Midgar. It depends where our boss is and those are his two biggest places of business." The woman nods and leads us to a rack of dresses. "Who do you work for?" Elena looks at me and I nod at her. "We work for President Rufus ShinRa. We're his personal bodyguards, the Turks." The woman looks at us shocked. "Oh my... Forgive me for questioning you! I didn't know you were with ShinRa." I wave a dismissive hand. "We just need a dress." The woman pulls a few dresses off the rack and folds them over her arm. We walk towards the dressing room and the woman sets down the dresses. "Ok, just call me if you have any trouble." Elena looks sort of nervous. I wrap my arms around her middle and kiss the crook of her neck. "I'm so excited, Tseng. I've always wanted this." I kiss her again and smile into her skin. "Me too, Elena. We can finally have a happy ending."

Elena grabs the dresses and enters the small room. I sit down and wait. The first dress she shows me doesn't flatter her figure at all and we both hate it. The next has too many beads, she likes it, but I don't. The one after that is a beautiful strapless, yet plain dress. I like this one, but she doesn't and she's the bride so I don't argue. "One more, hun." Oh Shiva... "It's perfect..." The dress is strapless, with a beaded torso. From the waist down it is a simple white and makes a wide skirt that is gathered in places with a little beading. "Tseng... I think this is the one I want... It's perfect for us." I have to agree. "Uhh... Clerk? I think we have a sale." Elena grabs a intricate tiara and veil too. The woman at the front is smiling. "Find a good one?" Elena is glowing beautifully. "Yes we did. We'd like this one." I just can't wait to see her in it walking down the aisle. Thank the Lifestream that I can call her mine.

x-x-x

"What are we doing Zack?" Gaia he's cute when he is confused. "We're having a date, Cloud. Let's play some games!" I put some Gil into a machine and I move the claw forward. I'm aiming for a a little box inside the machine, it's smaller than everything else. Cloud huffed and walked away. I lower the claw and pick up the box... Come on... So close... Damn it fell. I put 100 more Gil in. I try again, but fail. Six times after this I'm left with only 128 Gil... I place my money in once more. I lower the claw... The little box is in the claw... And it falls. I punch the machine with a frown. "Hey buddy. You trying for something?" I turn to the guy next me. "Yeah I was going for that right there." I point at the box and the man smiles. "For someone special?" I nod. "Then here ya go." The man hands me 100 Gil and walks away. I smile and put it in. "Here we go..." I position the claw and drop it. As soon as I drop the claw I turn away really quickly. I wait. -clink- I spin around and open the prize drawer. "WOO!" I grab the little box and run to find Cloud. I clap the guy who gave me the Gil on the back too. "Cloud!" He's playing some video game and I pull him to me. "Happy anniversary!" He looks down at the little box and opens it. There's two necklaces inside. It's a yin and yang heart. It splits into two pieces. Cloud's eyes are teary as he looks at me. "Zack..." I pick out the little white half and place it around his neck and do the same for myself. Cloud throws himself into my arms and I hug him tightly. "I love you, Cloud."

x-x-x

From the shadows two catlike green eyes watch the spectacle with a smile. "I see my Gil went to a good cause, Zackary. Now I should get away before I lose this fleeting mind of mine again and kill everyone. Keep strong Cloud." The figure disappeared into thin air, leaving the two lovers alone.


	28. Ancient Angel

**Cracked Visage**

**Ancient Angel**

Man I'm missin' Reno already and it's only been a day. "Don't you think you should stop drinking now buddy? It's only the early evening and you've been here all day." I snort at the bartender. "I'm fine, just get me another scotch." My words are slightly slurred, but I don't care. "Ryuu?!" I look up and see Elena and Tseng... Shit was I suppose ta be on duty? "What the hell are you doing here drinking yourself into a coma for?" I wave a hand to the seats across from me and they sit down. I catch a glimpse of Elena's ring and I smile a drunken smile. "Congratulations! When are ya due?" Elena blushed. "I'm not pregnant you idiot. We're just engaged." I nod and set my head down on the table. "I miss'im." I can picture Tseng raising an eyebrow and Elena looking confused. "Reno and Rufus are like in love and you're in love... an' I'm alone." My voice breaks with a sob. "Poor thing. You''ll find somebody. You just have to keep your chin up." I sob again. Elena is a sweet thing, but I'm so lonely. "Well I know this sounds really cruel, but could you pull yourself together. We are meeting a prospective Turk here. We need at least one more." I nod and stop my sobbing with a little difficulty. Elena hands me a Sober medicine from her pocket. Damn ShinRa technology... Why'ya have ta make a drug that sobers ya up so fast? It ruins the point of gettin' drunk. "Hello are you the Turks?" I look up and nearly choke. It looks like a Reno clone in girl form. "Hi I am Rio. I wanted to try out for the Turks." Rio?! What the fuck? "Reno what the hell are ya doin'?" The Reno girl looks upset. "My name is Rio thank you very much. And you might be?" My eye twitches. "Liar! You're Reno in disguise! I swear it! An' I'm not drunk no more so I'm not hallucinatin'!!" The woman grabs me by the front of my shirt and pulls me forward. I'd hit her if she didn't look like Reno... I got no problems with hittin' a girl, but hittin' Reno would get me killed.

"Listen here asshole. My name is Rio. Rio Angelvene. Now if you can't get that through your thick fucking head that I'm Rio and no fucking Reno in disguise then I will have to bash that pretty face in. Get me?" Holy shit I just fell in love. "I'm Ryuu. It's nice ta meet ya. Sorry for that ya look like Reno... a lot... But I believe ya, cause Reno would never be able to complete an actual sentence without usin' his slum drawl or cover up his tattoos. You're fuckin' hot by the way." Tseng and Elena slam their heads into the table behind us. Rio loosens up on my shirt and smiles. "Hello Ryuu. Thank you... You're quite handsome yourself." I pumped my fist in the air and let out a cheer. "Hey darlin', if ya join the Turks wanna get a drink sometime?" Rio giggled. "I'd like that Ryuu." Score one for Ryuu! Maybe I can fix this broken heart after all!

x-x-x

"Ryuu calm down and explain, yo." I just got a call from a frantic Ryuu and I'm pretty damn confused. "Ryuu why don't ya just stop by Rufus' house so I can understand ya!" Rufus looks unamused. We just got done with our sixth or seventh round of hot sex. I'm kinda tired, but damn is he amazin'! "Kay, see ya in a minute." I hang up the phone and roll my eyes. "He's coming by?" I nod at Rufus while pulling on some pants. "Put a shirt on too." I snort a little. "Jealous? Or worried?" Rufus frowns deeper. "Both." I pull on a shirt and turn to Rufus. "Do I need ta put on socks too? In case he has'a foot fetish?" Rufus did something I've never seen him do before. He flipped me off. "Woah babe! That was shockin'! I'm so proud, yo!" I run forward and kiss him. A knock on the door breaks us apart. I walk to the front door and open it. Ryuu throws himself in the house and into my arms. "I'm in love! I'm in love, Reno! An' it ain't you anymore either!" I chuckle and carry him to the couch with his arms around my neck and legs around my waist. "Explain, yo." Ryuu smiled a gorgeous smile and I almost felt jealous of whoever he was with... "Her name is Rio Angelvene. She'sa red head with crimson hair like you. She could be ya in girl form Reno! I swear! I thought she was you when I met her! I was drinkin' myself ta death cause I missed ya and was like all heartbroken an' shit when Tseng and Elena showed up!" I listened to the burst of words leaving Ryuu's mouth with a confused face. I drove him ta drink like that? Fuck... Rufus had walked out of the room in pants without a shirt. Oh so he can do it but I can't?! I huffed and pulled off my shirt. Ryuu looked at me with confusion. Rufus just rolled his eyes.

"Continue, Ryuu. Tseng and Elena." Ryuu shook away the strangeness of my random desire to lose my shirt and continued on. "Well did ya know Tseng and Laney are gettin' married?!" I felt my jaw drop. "WHAT!?" Rufus obviously was shocked too as he shouted the same thing. "Oh ya. He proposed ta her! She was all happy and hangin' on his arm. I was happy for'em. But then they said a prospective Turk was meetin' them there at the bar. I took'a Sober and then this lady showed up! She was yer clone Reno! All she was missin' were the tattoos! An' the slum drawl. Well I accused her of bein' you playin' a trick on me and then she grabbed me by the front of my shirt an' cursed me out. I didn't hit her cause I thought it was you and you woulda killed me or hurt me for hittin' ya. Well I think I fell in love, yo! I told'er she was hot and then asked her out and she said yes!! I'm so happy! I thought I was gonna be heartbroken forever! I know she ain't ya, but I can make do with what I got." I was shocked ta say the least. I knew Ryuu loved me, but I didn't know he was obsessed... "I'm happy for ya Ryuu! Congrats. Wow a lot happens when we stay in bed for a day, huh Rufus?" Rufus shook his head slightly. "Honestly I lost my train of thought at the 'Tseng is getting married' part." I can't blame'im... It's quite shockin'.

x-x-x

"Let's go to the Battle Square!" I smile and nod at Zack. Damn how could I forget our anniversary? He hasn't said anything about me forgetting yet, but I know he thought it. These necklaces are cute. I need to get him a present and soon. I hope he doesn't think I'm a terrible fiancé! I could have sworn I sensed Sephiroth nearby… I guess I was wrong but it was eerie. His presence wasn't evil… it was almost like he was back to normal for a minute…

x-x-x

Now this is weird. Sephiroth isn't hurting people? Hmm… "Stop!" He freezes and turns around. "Who are you? I don't have time for this." I examine him. I knew it. His aura is conflicting… A light side and dark side. I saw it on the boat but I wasn't sure. "I'm Aeris Gainsborough. Calm down. I'm special. I can see your aura." It's a good thing I sent Cait Sith with Tifa when I saw her. I approach Sephiroth slowly. "You look familiar…" I smile at him softly. "I travel with Cloud and Zack. I saw you on the boat to Costa del Sol." He looks almost panicked now. "Then you should know I'm a time bomb waiting to detonate." I shake my head and step closer, his light side takes complete control as I push his darkness back. "Don't worry, I can keep her from taking over you for awhile. It will tire me out a little, but I think you need some peace. Would you like to walk with me?" He relaxes minutely as he realizes I've pushed back the darkness. "Ok." We walk quietly side by side. "Thank you… I needed some time to relax." His voice is so low I barely hear him, but I catch what he says. "Don't worry. I can see you're a good person. You just can't fight her. She's not your mother you know. You're human not a monster." He shakes his head sadly. "I wish I could use that to fight her, but I can't. She is too strong. Every time I get close to any of her cells she flares up. I can't stop it. I'm sure Cloud is struggling with it too. I can sense her in him." I nod slowly. "He is, but his friends can help him fight. And his love for Zack helps him too. But you have no one to keep you sane. Don't you have a few friends who would stick with you through everything?"

Sephiroth frowns. "I did. Angeal, Zack, and Reno were my best friends. And Genesis was my lover I suppose. But Angeal and Genesis are dead. I'm sure Zackary has told you about them. Reno and Zack don't want anything to do with me. And what in the world would I say to Cloud? I'm sorry I murdered your mother and burned your town, then tried to kill your lover, your friend, and you yourself, but could you ever find it in your heart to be my friend?" It makes me sad to see him so defeated. "Don't ever give up. I'll be your friend. I promise. One day I will help you get her out of your system. Until then please try to fight. She is strong but I know you can fight her. Like now. You could have killed everyone here, but you fought it. And you could give up fighting and let her break free. Then she would kill me too." Sephiroth turned to face me. We are in a secluded area of the Gold Saucer. "Aeris has anyone ever told you that you're an angel?" I laugh softly. "Yes but they're wrong. I'm not an angel. I am an Ancient and a woman. That's all I need to work miracles." Sephiroth looked at the moon. I'm beginning to weaken. "You should go. I can feel her gaining strength." I nod and turn to go. "But Aeris…" I turn back slightly. "Thank you. Don't trust me if we meet again please. I don't want you to get hurt. I can't lose another friend." I feel something warm on my lips. I close my eyes are kiss him back softly. When he pulls away I smile. "Good night Sephiroth and good luck." I turn and run down the path to the populated area of Gold Saucer. I chance one look back, but he is gone.

x-x-x

"Woah…" That's a lot of bodies… They've all been shot too… Where the fuck is Barret?! "Hey Cloudy, do you think Barret…?" He shakes his head at me. "I don't think so, but you never know. Let's keep looking." We walk up the stairs to the battle arena. This is disgusting… There are so many bodies. "Hey! Who do you think you are killing people in my park?" I turn to look at the voice. It's a guy with several bodyguards… Dammit they have Aeris and the others. "Throw them to the prison." The rest of our group is thrown into a hole in the floor. I rush at the man with my sword out and Cloud does the same. The bodyguards do a reversal maneuver and it sends us falling into the hole. I grab Cloud's hand as we fall.


	29. Mistaken Signs

**Cracked Visage**

**Mistaken Signs**

Well that landing wasn't very nice. I groan and look around. "Everyone ok?" I see everyone moving and grumbling their pains. "Good." I look up in time to see Zack and Cloud falling right where I was standing. I side-stepped Zack and caught Cloud. I would have caught Zack but one he'd be angry I didn't catch Cloud and two he is too big. Cloud groaned in my arms. "Thanks Sears." I nod and set him down on his feet. I was lucky that damn sword of his didn't take my arm off. Zack stands up quickly, trying to assess Cloud's personal damage. He was pleased to find no harm. Zack nodded thanks to me and I nodded back. Red growled slightly and flicked his tail in the air. "There is blood down here too. I can smell it. So either our murderer is here too or Barret is." I didn't like the thought of it being Barret. After all he is the leader of AVALANCHE. We all start our search for Barret or a way out. The talking cat thing said this was Corel Prison which is surrounded by a desert and quicksand… Damn. So guy told us to search out the "boss" so we started looking through buildings. This is so damn stupid. We should be going after Sephiroth… I am so gonna chew Barret out for this when we find him. We all enter a building and are immediately met with gunshots. Everyone gets on the defensive, but the body of a crook falls out from behind a couch and Barret reveals himself. I growl and grab him by the front of his shirt.

"What the hell Barret? You killing people now? What was up with all the bodies!?" Barret looks stunned for a moment. "Tha' wasn't me! I swear! There is another man with a gun grafted to his arm! It was four years ago. I worked and lived in North Corel. ShinRa offered us money for permission to build a reactor. I supported the idea and everyone in the town did too. But my best friend Dyne didn't. He had a problem with i'. I told him it was gonna be fine. I was wrong. The reactor malfunctioned and ShinRa blamed North Corel. Me an' Dyne were comin' back from a trip and we saw the town burning. ShinRa chased us and Dyne slipped over a cliff. I grabbed him with my left hand and he held on with his righ'. The grunts shot our hands off. I thought Dyne was dead. But the doctor told me another man had a similar surgery only on hi' right hand. I was hopeful. Well when the town was burned I got there and everyone was dead. My wife Myrna and Dyne's wife Eleanor were both gon'. All I could do was save his lil' baby girl, Marlene. I became her papa. But it looks like Dyne is still alive. I need to find him and tell him I'm sorry for ruining the town. This is my job and I don' want no help." Cloud shook his head. "No Barret we are with you till the end. We'll help you find Dyne, but we will leave the fight, if there is one, for you."

Barret huffed but realized this was the best that he was gonna get. We all grouped up and left the building. Yuffie, the little brat was complaining again about the heat. What the fuck? It's a desert what does she expect? Icicle Inn? We move towards the desert and see a cliff. It looks like we found our guy. Hopefully Barret will take care of this fast.

x-x-x

"Dyne… I'm so sorry man. It's me Barret." Dyne turns to me. "Barret? It's been a long time since I've seen your ugly face. You have a lot of nerve showing your face here. After you destroyed my life. You were supposed to be my best friend!" Dyne shoots at me and the bullet grazes my cheek. "I know man. I'm sorry. But Marlene is alive! And she looks so much like ya Dyne! You should come see her. She's a beautiful little girl. We can both be her papas!" Dyne growled. "I can hear her voice… Eleanor's… She's begging me not to hate your filthy guts!" Oh Dyne… My best friend… If we hadn't gone on that trip to "reconnect" this wouldn't have happened. We should have let that flame die when we got married and just stayed friends. Dyne starts fighting me with full force and I haffta shoot back. We fight for five to ten minutes, but we ain't worried about time. Dyne gives up… That ain't like him. "I just want to destroy everything Barret. You, Marelene, Gaia… Look after her for me and give her this pendant from her mother. Good bye." I stretch my arm forward. "DYNE!" I watch him throw himself from the cliff. I sink to my knees.

x-x-x

I feel bad for Barret. I try to channel some spiritual energy over him to calm him down, but I am still weak from my meeting with Sephiroth… I unconsciously touch my lips again… He kissed me… I sure do know how to pick men… I hope I can help him fix himself without everyone figuring it out. It wouldn't be good for Cloud and Zack to know. Barret pulls himself from the ground slowly and picks up the pendant Dyne tossed him. Poor thing. We start to trek back to the main prison. Barret leads us to a building. Inside is a man who says he can sign us up for a chocobo race for our freedom.

x-x-x

"Alright who is gonna be your jockey?" Why is everyone looking at me...? They couldn't possibly... "No." Everyone raises an eyebrow. "I hate them. I don't like chocobos... I won't do it." Zack walks up and claps a hand on my back. "Cloudy you're the only one small enough." I shake my head quickly. "I nominate Yuffie." Yuffie snorts. "Like no way. I am not touching that nasty, nasty bird. I'm a princess so I don't have to!" Yuffie sticks her tongue out at me. "I can't... Chocobos don't like me!" Zack smiles at me and I start to shake. "No worries Cloudy! Chocobos adore you! You'll do fine!" The man signs us up for a race and I am taken up the elevator. The woman assigned to be my manager is very nice. Ester her name is. She leads me to the Jockey Lounge and tells me to wait till she gets a chocobo ready. I see a glint out of the corner of my eye. A summons materia? I pick it up and put it in my pocket for later. "Cloud! I have your chocobo ready!" Oh Shiva please save me. She tells me the rules and directions of Chocobo racing and then the bell rings. "Good luck!" I nod at her and walk out to the race course. I mount the chocobo and the thing warks contentedly at me. I unconsciously growl and lean forward. "Ready... Set... WARK!"

x-x-x

"That's... uhh nice Ryuu. But don't ya think it's kinda cruel to be interest only cause she looks like me? I'm flattered, yo, but I don't want ya dwelling on somethin' that will probably never happen." Ryuu shrugs. "I know, but I don't think I can get over ya. And she is just so perfect. She is so much like ya and yet different. Rio... She even has a name that sounds like yers! Should I really not be happy that such an amazin' woman has fallen into my lap?! Oh and by the way... I kinda asked her ta stop by so you can meet'er..." I sighs softly and there is a knock at the door. "Thanks fer the warnin'." I stand and answer the door. "Hi... Is Ryuu here?" I feel my jaw drop. She really is a replica of me! "Heya Rio! Come on in!" She giggles and walks inside. "I suppose you would be Reno. I can see why you confused us now Ryuu. Oh... Are you? President ShinRa?" Rufus nodded. "Call me Rufus. Until you are recruited into the Turks. Then I'll be sir." The woman nodded slowly. "Ya are my clone..." Rio smiled at me. "I have to admit we share many features... the hair, height, skin tone, eyes... Perhaps we are related?" I shake my head. "Nah my Ma was a slums whore from Midgar." Rio blushed slightly. "Oh well then that settles that. I am a Costa del Solian. Born and raised." Ryuu is staring at the woman in lust, I feel a spark of jealous that Rufus obviously noticed. "Reno is my 2nd in command. He is right behind Tseng. The Turks used to be quite an expansive branch, but due to terrorist movements they have been fiercely." Rio nodded at Rufus. "I understand." Rufus walked over to me and wrapped an arm around my waist. I blushed slightly with Rio and Ryuu frowned. "I would hope you can manage a relationship and work. As you see it seems all of my Turks are interested in someone. Tseng and Elena. Reno and myself. And now Ryuu and you." Rio blushed deeper. "We're just going on a date. It isn't definite yet..." I laugh a little. "Ryuu is my protégé. I've taught him well with the ladies. If ya can stand up against the kid's charm for an entire date then I'll start wearin' rainbow outfits and declaring that I'm gettin' a sex change. In other words it won' happen, yo."

Rio huffed. "Ladies? I thought his arm around you was enough to say you don't swing that way." I smirk slightly and lean in towards her sexily. "I swing both ways, love. Ain't no gender safe from me. But yeah, I'm datin' Rufus right now. Such is why Ryuu ain't over here in my arms, yo. The kid is straight as the weapon he uses, but I'm just an exception ta the rule, yo. So ya better be good ta him or I'll warn ya, I don' have a problem hurtin' pretty lil'girlies like yerself, yo." Ryuu put his head in his hands and groaned. Rufus raised an eyebrow. And the little fire cat in front of me narrowed her eyes. "Is that so? Well listen here asshole. I am a lot stronger than I look. You can't scare me with idle threats. You're so damn skinny I'd be honestly surprised if you could snap a toothpick. So shut the fuck up or will I have to do it for you? And stop using that stupid word 'yo'!" I feel my eyes flash blue. Rufus tightens his grip. "I would advise you not to speak to Reno like that. You see he isn't exactly as weak as he appears either. In fact, he is the strongest Turk I have. Not to mention, for fair warning, he is not quite mentally stable. To be blunt, if you piss him off he will kill you. And it seems from the change in his eye color you pissed him off." Reno sneered. "Ya think? Let me go Ruf. I wanna teach 'er a fuckin' lesson on how ta speak ta me. And how she just did sure as hell isn't the way! If she wants ta see strong I'll give 'er strong! Maybe I don' want 'er 'round my Ryuu. I don' want 'er 'round ya either! Lemme go!" I start struggling hard against Rufus' restraint. I feel my eyes going completely blue and widening to reveal Ifrit's flame. Ryuu looks horrified and Rio looks a little frightened. Rufus pushes me onto the sofa and straddles me. "Calm down Reno. We need another Turk." I go suddenly limp and Rufus relaxes his hold. I smirk and flip him. "Ya need ta learn all my tricks, love. Or you'll always end up under me." I laugh and stand up while flicking out my EMR. "So, pretty... are ya gonna apologize? Fer makin' me mad?" Rio frowned and eyed my weapon. "Calm down Reno. Come'on ya don' need ta be killin' her." How cute.. "It's cute that ya want ta save yer pretty lil'girl here Ryuu... It's even cuter that between me or her ya make no moves ta protect'er."


	30. Protected Legacy

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**This is where Ryuu gets a small break here since he is so heartbroken. I had to force myself to pair him, despite the fact that I only like him with Reno. :(! **

**I wrote two little oneshot, songfics a few days ago. Against all odds is a ZackxCloud sad deathfic. Lucifer's Angel is an idea of what is running through Sephiroth's mind when he is crazy. Then I decided start a story for my oneshot Failure about RenoxRyuu. I really like how both CV and Failure are coming along, Failure is much shorter with only 2,000 words per chapter. The reason why the chapters for CV are so long is that they are all 10,000 words except Stained Innocence and Blissful Ignorance, which are 3,000 words. I think I might break my chapters down into 2,000 word parts to get my chapter count up higher.**

**UPDATE: ALL CHAPTERS HAVE BEEN BROKEN DOWN TO 2,000 WORDS AND NO UPDATES HAVE BEEN ADDED! THIS IS TO HELP SPEED UP UPDATES AND RAISE MY CHAPTER COUNT. IT ALSO MAKES IT EASIER ON MY READERS WITH THESE SMALLER CHAPTERS. SORRY IF YOU SAW THE NUMBER OF UPDATES AND GOT EXCITED :(! **

**ENJOY!**

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Cracked Visage

**Protected Legacy**

Woot! Cloud pulled it off. I see him dismount the chocobo. The bird tries to nuzzle his hair, but Cloud smacked it away. The chocobo gave an indignant wark and tried again. I walked over to where Cloud was glaring daggers at the help less bird. "Back off chocobo. This one is mine." I smacked the bird away and nuzzled Cloud's head myself. The bird hung it's head in defeat and walked away. "I'm proud of you my chocobo-champion!" Cloud turned his glare at me and smacked me away now. "I just got rid of the other one. I don't need porcupine nuzzling me now." I pouted. "You are so cruel to me Cloudy. I just wanted LOVE!" I wail the last word and pretend to sob. Cloud wrinkles his nose and turns his head dismissively. Ouch that was cold. Dio approached us. "Good job in that race! Sorry for the mistake. You're free to go and please take this buggy as an apology." Thank Gaia. Our group assembles and we plan our next move. "Ok so Gongaga is near here and I'd like to stop by and say hello to my folks. Is that ok?" Everyone nods their approval except Yuffie. I sigh and ask her what's wrong. "I don't want to go see your icky old parents! You're like really old already and they're probably like ancient!" I smack my forehead. I hear a resounding slap and look up. Cloud hit Yuffie on the back on the head... She collapsed. "Can we hurry before she wakes up and starts talking again?" Sears howled with laughter with Barret, and Aeris and Tifa giggled. Red was silent as usual and Cait Sith looks rather worried about Yuffie. "Is the lass going to be ok?!" Cloud nodded at the mechanical cat. "She'll be fine as long as we get out of here before she wakes up and I have to knock her out again." We all file out of Gold Saucer and into the buggy. I can't wait to get home and flaunt my chocobo-headed bride/groom!

x-x-x

"I hope Ryuu will be ok..." Tseng soothes me for the fifth time. "He'll be fine. Reno would never let him fall too deeply into depression." I smile up at my love from my place on his lap. We're back at the hotel. Rufus is returning to Junon in a few days and the Turks are going to Gongaga tomorrow morning to meet Scarlet before returning to Junon. "Will you try the dress on again?" I nod and rise. He loves the dress as much as I do and I'm glad. I walk to the closet and start putting on the dress. It makes me feel like a princess... I'm worried about what my dad will say when I see him... He is based in Junon so I will be seeing him soon at the memorial. We have to hold a service for the lost Turks and president. I'm sure Rufus is dreading the day like I am. I exit the closet and spin around showing off my dress. Tseng has a very dopey smile on his face. "I think it so perfect! I love it." Tseng nods and pulls me in to his arms. "I do too. You look amazing in it." A knock at the door startles us. I dash into the closet and peel off the dress. I slip my regular clothes back on while Tseng looked through the peep hole. He gaped. "Elena you're not going to like this..." There was another impatient knock and I looked at Tseng confused. He opened the door revealing my father. Oh shit... "Dad?! What the hell are you doing here?!" The man looks from me to Tseng in confusion before stepping inside. "I got time off for my daughter's death. I heard you were in Costa del Sol but no one told me you were with the Turks." I frowned. I didn't tell him that I was accepted into the Turks yet. "Dad... I am a Turk. I was accepted due to the dire need for them. I thought someone would give you that information." He looked shocked and annoyed. "What are you trying to do Elena? Replace your sister? You would never be able to!" I growled but it was cut off my Tseng's cough. "Excuse me. I am the 1st in command of the Turks and I will be the one to make the determination on whether or not Elena is better than Emina. And from the in field observations I have made myself, she seems to be a better Turk all around. She knows how to do her job well and saved my life personally."

Dad frowned. "Aren't you the one who got Emina pregnant? I blame you for her death. If she was in better condition she could have survived!" Tseng narrowed his eyes. "Emina would not allow me to take her off the field. I admit it was a mistake on my part, but she had a part in it." I nodded. "What are you doing in my daughter's hotel room? Are you trying to have her fill the gap Emina left?" Tseng smiled and laughed. "Not at all sir. It seems I may have fallen in love with your daughter Elena. In fact... I have asked her to marry me and she has accepted." I smiled at Tseng warmly. "I did and I'm happy to be his fiancée." Dad looked pissed to say the least. He swung his fist at Tseng. Tseng smirked and side-stepped his attacks with ease. I walked forward and grabbed his hand. Dad turned quickly back to me. "You're nothing but a slut!" I felt a shock travel through me as his open palm connected with my cheek. It didn't hurt that bad but it was shocking. What was more shocking was that Tseng had him on the ground at gunpoint before the slap even made a sound.

x-x-x

"Fine I'm sorry. I didn't expect you to freak out." I watch the ignorant girl snort. Reno twitched with bloodlust. "I'll see you tomorrow night Ryuu." She smiled at him and left. Reno growled and I wrapped my arm around his waist. "Calm down. She's gone now." Ryuu looked at Reno worried. "If ya don't want me ta date her I won't Reno..." Reno shook his head coming back to reality. "Nah... I guess I'm just used ta ya being mine..." I sighed slowly and motioned for Ryuu to sit on the other side of Reno. He did so and Reno relaxed. I massaged his shoulders softly before pressing on his pressure point. He fell unconscious against me. Ryuu looked almost frantic. "Calm down. He will wake up in a minute. I think you should spend the night with him in the guest room." Ryuu blinked a few times. "But, sir... What about ya and Reno..." I shrug. "He said he had all the loose ends tied up but I guess not. I can give him some more time if needs it." Ryuu chewed on his nail for a minute. "Uhh... Sir if ya'd like I could just stay near him... Without, ya know, doin' nothing... After all I don't want ta be a third wheel... He likes ya a lot, y'know... I don't want ta screw that up fer him. Ya know what I mean?" I nodded and pet Reno's hair down. "I doubt he will be up for anything tonight anyway. If you are interested and not afraid, you may stay with us in my room. I can assure you the bed is plenty big enough." Ryuu blushed and I had to remind myself that, though they looked alike, he was not Reno. "Sure I could do that sir." I nodded and lifted Reno into my arms. He followed me to the bedroom quietly. "And Ryuu, you may call me Rufus." The boy nearly choked but nodded. I set Reno down in the center of the bed and removed his pants leaving him in boxers. I took off my own pants and Ryuu did the same. I crawled in beside Reno and put my head on his chest. I felt Ryuu set his head down near mine and I let sleep overtake me. The things I do for you Reno...

x-x-x

"Don't you ever touch her again... The only reason a bullet is not lodged in your skull is because you are her father." I smiled at Tseng. "Thank you, hun, for defending me." He looked up at me with worried eyes. He stood quickly and put a gentle hand to my cheek. I leaned into the touch. "Are you hurt, Elena?" I shook my head as dad scrambled to his feet. "Get out.," Tseng growled at him and he did just as he asked. It was funny to see my strict military father running for his life. "I love you." His face softened as he looked at me. "I love you too."

x-x-x

The road to Gongaga is a long one so it will take us about all night and tomorrow's morning to get there. Barret is still being so quiet. I feel bad for the man... Gaia I wish Cloud would knock Yuffie out again. Him and Zack are all curled up sleeping while Tifa drives. Me, Cait Sith, and Red are just camped out here in the back of the buggy being quiet. Aeris is fiddling with Yuffie's hair while she rambles on and about being a "princess". I roll my eyes and sigh. I'm happy they are calling me by my name now. I didn't like being called "Biggs" very much... I much prefer my real name. I like this little group we have accumulated, except Yuffie, because we make a good team. AVALANCHE has grown a lot over the last little while. Maybe we still stand a chance at saving the world. We need to bring ShinRa down... For Elfé's dream... I hope maybe someday I can figure out a way to cheat this damn Revive Materia... Speaking of Materia... Cloud gave me a really interesting summons earlier... Ramuh... I can't wait to try it out in battle. I haven't used a summons materia for awhile... I need to pick up a new armlet in the next town. Gongaga... Zack's hometown huh? I heard some dark rumors about Gongaga being destroyed... Let's hope that it isn't. I'd hate to have to see Zack deal with something like that... Him and Cloud make a good couple... People like us should stick together... It helps us remember we are still human despite the things they did to us to try and change that fact. Just like me and Elfé...

Sometimes I wonder if I will ever be able to move on from her, yet other times I'm happy I haven't. She is the one thing that holds me together. She holds me together by giving me something to live for. I live to protect her legacy, AVALANCHE. It is all I have left of her to remember everything she stood for and devoted her life to. I have to protect it because of that. I must always protect her memory and legacy or it will fade into the darkness with time. I want revenge for her and I will have it eventually. I promised and I always keep a promise. And some day when I am finally dead and gone I can see her in the Lifestream and smile. I'll tell her I kept my promise and now we can be together. She'll smile one of her rare smiles and hold on to my hand tightly... Then we will finally just fade off into the Lifestream and be together for all eternity... It is my perfect idea of heaven. I will have it some day... and then I can be happy... But until then all I have is my memories and AVALANCHE... I will always protect both.


End file.
